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DH booked a trip for him for my birthday

381 replies

MrsDurrells · 28/06/2024 14:11

DH asked what I’d like for my birthday (last weekend), I clearly said no trips as I end up doing all the packing, planning, unpacking washing etc.
Hes booked us glamping, leaving after school today. All week I’ve reminded him I’m not packing, meal planning, shopping etc and guess what-he’s done a bit of a shop but no meal plans (eg we have bacon, broccoli and cookies?), there’s 3 kids to pack for still and the weather is set to be hot, cold, sunny, and rainy so all weathers really, and he’s not packed a thing yet!

Part of me says don’t help but another part of me knows it’s me and the kids that will suffer because frankly, we’ve experienced similar before! He is so unprepared about most things in life as he knows I always step in and sort it and he openly says he thinks I’m a perfectionist (I’m not I just like to be prepared and have saved his arse so many times!) It’s exhausting. It’s more a jolly for him than me isn’t it?

OP posts:
Hihellogoodbye · 29/06/2024 22:44

you lot are some ungrateful people that’s all
I can say.
i’d be grateful that he bothered to do something . If it was me I’d stop even remembering it is your bday…see how you like it
a gift is a gift so where I’m from we are being taught to be grateful

BuggeryBumFlaps · 29/06/2024 22:05

The op won't be able to charge her phone to respond until she gets back. Doubt chargers or battery packs have been packed.

This reminds me of a time my db took his 3dd's camping. He let them pack and his youngest arrived with her swimming costume, pjs, leggings and her school uniform for a week in Wales. Luckily my parents lived close to the campsite so my mum took the dd's shopping Grin

SammyTales · 29/06/2024 21:11

I can't wait for an update... I hope you had some fun at least...

DexaVooveQhodu · 29/06/2024 20:19

Don't lift a finger. When it all goes horribly wrong just be prepared to take the kids home. He's a shitty husband for going ahead and booking a trip when you specifically said you didn't want any such thing. This is the chance to practically demonstrate to him quite how shitty he is.

Have something nice at home (new DVD & some bags of popcorn?) that you can pull out to ameliorate the kids' disappointment when you have to come home because there's no food/practical necessities and it's simply not possible to stay.

HadEnoughOfBears · 29/06/2024 20:15

Unless he's packed power banks for phone / device charging there's always a chance that the 12yr old will be as equally annoyed with him 🤣

ThatsAFineLookingHighHorse · 29/06/2024 20:13

thestudio · 29/06/2024 19:57

Are you still with this crappy selfish man? I just don't understand why women accept this kind of stuff.

That's what I want to know ... not to mention WTF didn't she insist they go home since he'd absolutely only thought of himself and proved he left everything to her .

thestudio · 29/06/2024 19:57

pinkstripeycat · 29/06/2024 18:43

I always organised everything. One time I had a bug 2 days before hols and I was too weak to pack or help anyone.
Kids had no walking boots, no coats, we didn’t have enough dog food (he eats raw so can’t just give him a tin from the supermarket) and hardly any food supplies and nothing for me.
It rained a lot so me and kids couldn’t go out. DH did as he’d brought all his things.
I had to do a food shop (he drove)as he didn’t have a clue what to get.
Dog was on half rations all week to eak out the food.
it was absolutely awful

Are you still with this crappy selfish man? I just don't understand why women accept this kind of stuff.

OhcantthInkofaname · 29/06/2024 19:21

MrsDurrells · 28/06/2024 16:27

Cats are fine, he’d asked his mum to pop in for them already so that’s good.

Please come back and give us the report on your weekend.

Secondly do not do the clean up when you get home!

pinkstripeycat · 29/06/2024 18:43

I always organised everything. One time I had a bug 2 days before hols and I was too weak to pack or help anyone.
Kids had no walking boots, no coats, we didn’t have enough dog food (he eats raw so can’t just give him a tin from the supermarket) and hardly any food supplies and nothing for me.
It rained a lot so me and kids couldn’t go out. DH did as he’d brought all his things.
I had to do a food shop (he drove)as he didn’t have a clue what to get.
Dog was on half rations all week to eak out the food.
it was absolutely awful

Toptops · 29/06/2024 18:36

He sounds well annoying. Agree that you need to wait for him to sort everything out. If you do, I bet he won't do it again

WimbyAce · 29/06/2024 18:36

I feel your pain, trips away always sound good in theory but it's all the mental load that goes with it and when it falls to 1 person it's awful.

allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 29/06/2024 18:20

@MrsDurrells Did the kids enjoy their bacon and brocolli breakfast??

Sleepytiredyawn · 29/06/2024 18:05

I would happily pack and send him on his way and have a chilled one on my own.

crumblingschools · 29/06/2024 15:22

Isn’t glamping meant to be glamorous camping. This trip does not sound glamorous

BruFord · 29/06/2024 14:48

ActualChips · 29/06/2024 14:39

Can no electricity, no utensils and no bedding really be 'glamping'? Sounds horrendous.

Yes, @ActualChips , I’ve always thought that “glamping” was a huge tent or yurt with proper beds and facilities.

This sounds like an ordinary campsite-perhaps a tent is provided, but nothing fancy!

ActualChips · 29/06/2024 14:39

Can no electricity, no utensils and no bedding really be 'glamping'? Sounds horrendous.

SeatonCarew · 29/06/2024 14:37

CheeseSandwichRiskAssessment · 29/06/2024 13:39

Except she actually went on the stupid trip so doesn't have a leg to stand on now, unfortunately

I concur she shouldn't have gone, she's reinforced he can get away with this nonsense. (Sigh).

CheeseSandwichRiskAssessment · 29/06/2024 13:39

SeatonCarew · 29/06/2024 13:36

He also still needs to get OP a birthday present she would actually like.

Except she actually went on the stupid trip so doesn't have a leg to stand on now, unfortunately

SeatonCarew · 29/06/2024 13:36

Timelass · 28/06/2024 17:41

When you return home OP,
I hope you will just have to pop out with your youngest, whilst your DH unpacks and sorts the washing out. 😊

He also still needs to get OP a birthday present she would actually like.

SeatonCarew · 29/06/2024 13:24

YellowAsteroid · 28/06/2024 17:36

He’s asked where various things are

Well, you know the answer to that @MrsDurrells : "Where they always are."

Or, "Wherever you left it". (Famously once my auto reply to a DC's enquiry as to where Croatia was...). 🤭

Codlingmoths · 29/06/2024 12:09

Stay firm op. When down there say airily make a note on your phone so you don’t forget it at your <bloody huge expensive> top up shop! You can take the kids of course, I might read my book for a while. Or go for a stroll. Make sure you work out dinner before you head off, you don’t want to have to go straight back out again.

Lurkingandlearning · 29/06/2024 11:59

I would not go and I would check what he’d packed for your kids - if it was inadequate I would say they couldn’t go either. I doubt it would be much fun for them with that incompetent, selfish idiot

CheeseSandwichRiskAssessment · 29/06/2024 11:36

Hopefully the OP brought her own loo paper, living with flatmates taught me to always have a personal stash.

crumblingschools · 29/06/2024 11:31

What’s the betting there is a compost loo!

LittleGreenDragons · 29/06/2024 11:28

GrumpyPanda · 29/06/2024 10:54

There's not even electricity! OP has probably run out of juice by now unless somebody brought a powerbank. Not expecting an update before Sunday night at the earliest.

Probably why he didn't pack the eldest's airpods. He knew they weren't going to be used... maybe 🤔

I hope OP is having a lovely time despite the chaos. Happy birthday OP! 🍾