"Your boobs are lovely!"

I had my nipple cut off when I had a partial mastectomy... its really not 'gag worthy'.

I do relate to your irritation with DH. I remember harping on about how gorgeous Catherine Zeta Jones was one evening and my DH said "but you're way prettier." I was so mad! I told him he was either being ridiculous or untruthful.

Ref your boobs. My friend had hers lifted, no implants, and honestly the result was fantastic. She is so glad she did it.

I have a couple of friends who often talk about how much they hate their droopy, empty boobs. I just think, if you can afford it, get them fixed.

Sorry this is getting you down, OP.
I had corrective breast surgery 2.5 years ago, nipples repositioned in the process, and am delighted with the results. You are only 40. Go and have some consultations so you can make an informed decision.
My surgeon was recommended by my GP.

Maybe they are lovely to him and he was being honest

If I were you I would go and get a consultation, at least a discussion to see what can be done

Why cares about your nipples being cut? Youll be asleep

Do you want to live with your boobs the rest of your life? If not do something about it

A lift alone might get you the results you want - I had a lift/reduction with a world class surgeon and mine look like implants, very perky and lots of projection. It’s fairly major surgery so not for the faint of heart but I wish I’d done it a decade earlier.

How many of us look the same post children though! Your hubby loves you .you have born and raised his DC ..you have given him a family life.br grateful OP..I am currently receiving treatment for ovarian cancer..my SIL and BFF have both had breast cancer
.please don't mess with an otherwise healthy body .there's more to life than perfect breasts you know!

Well you shouldn't and if you're not, more power to you, genuinely. But some of us are and that's perfectly valid.

Very good.
And to the OP, please don't be so harsh to
yourself!
It's good to know about these lovely husbands
as well.
👍🎉🤝

Mine are similar to those pics, I didn't realise I should be self conscious of them..

From the other side of the coin I know someone who had those pip implants and told no action needed unless problematic. Always on the back of her mind. Fast forward to 2020 and one was leaking all over, lumps under armpits, misshapen boob, pain. Took a good 12 months to get sorted via NHS, who thankfully took on their safe removal. I know pip was pulled in 2010 but you just never know the next scandal. Even leaving aside the risks, Im so surprised to see many suggesting surgery. Sooner or later you have to accept ageing and is there any dignity in a pair of bolt ons? The theme here is most DHs are happy with what you've already got, and why have a pair of fake bangers over a big saggy gut?!

At 40, I’d definitely consider surgery.

Get the surgery if you want it op. Life is so short - why wouldn’t you?! Genuine question!

Yes, exactly this.

Hating your body at 40 is no fun.

I can completely relate. I'm currently a year postpartum myself after two babies (big age gap) and having combination fed both. My body has taken a battering.

I'm currently losing weight and have half a stone to go to get back to my goal weight. I'm a road map of stretch marks, varicose veins and saggy pancake spaniel ear titties. Unlike you, I was a modest b cup. Now I'm a very deflated B cup verging on an A cup. Nipples are definitely cock eyed and one points down more than the other. One is now definitely larger than the other. Always had a bit of A symmetry but now it's obvious.

I hate my body, the lumps, bumps and the extra padded bras I have to wear. Pants need to high waisted as well to pull in the mum tum. Thighs are a mess and my hair is limp and growing back in greying tufts.

Thank fuck I have a decent face!

I don't know what the solution is. I do remind myself that I've grown and nurtured two tiny humans, I'm working and raising a family, I am older and aging is natural (similar age to you) my H has been understanding and reassuring as well but he just doesnt get it. It makes me feel shallow and vain but I miss my pre kid body . His lack of understanding and writing it off as me be overly sensitive and unrealistic pisses me off to no end. I get the rage, bad, whenever he compliments me or says he fancies me still, more than ever.

When you find the answer, please share!

I absolutely hate my tits OP. Having struggled with eating disorders for most of my adult life, losing extreme amounts of weight, putting a bit on then losing even more. Mine too are shit. Now, I have lovely bras, they look cracking when I'm clothed. When I am unclothed. They're horrid. Now, I actually genuinely believe my husband loves them but I too can get the rage when the poor bloke tries to compliment them because I know they're not 'amazing' 'gorgeous' etc. I would much prefer him to say 'well no, they're not what they once were but I love them anyway'. At least that would feel genuine.

I would love to have mine done and they could chop what they want off and reattach whatever they want if it made them look and thus me feel, better. But I cannot afford it. So I'll continue to be pissed off and lacking confidence in my piss poor norks.

Going slightly against the grain here I think…
Can you afford breast augmentation? If you can, absolutely do it. It doesn’t matter what your husband thinks or what we think, it’s about how YOU feel. Your body is making you deeply unhappy. You ask if it’s worth it at 40? YES! Definitely it is. 40 is young. If it’ll give you more confidence and make you feel happier then go for it.

But maybe he does think they are lovely?

I was in exactly your position, I went to see the doctor and then a cosmetic surgeon who after various excruciating examinations agreed with me that they were in a sorry state ( not those exact words) , it wasn't a commercial clinic and he was recommended by my GP and very professional.
I had implants put in- not big ones but honestly it's one of the best decisions I ever made.
I make no judgment on anyone but for me it was a huge issue and badly affected my confidence so it was a gift to myself after successfully breastfeeding 3 babies.

My goodness me - you are amazing! The amount of weight you’ve lost is incredible. You should be feeling like a superhero - not beating yourself up. I cannot fathom how much willpower and pain it was to do that.

Get a boob job if that would make you feel better - don’t overthink what the operation will entail. If women overthought gory medical stuff, none of us would have kids.

I had very large, saggy boobs and had a reduction and lift a couple of years ago. BEST thing I’ve ever done and the difference it’s made to my life is huge. I’m much happier, more confident, my relationship has improved, I can dress nicer.

If you want it, do it. The only regret I have is that I didn’t do it sooner.

OP, I don't think you are really being heard here. Your husband gave the best answer he could possibly give. Maybe he thinks your boobs are lovely, maybe he doesn't however he clearly loves you and wants you to feel better about them.

Objectively, those boobs you say are similar to yours do not look good, certainly not for a young woman (yes, 40 is young, far too young to be so unhappy with your body).

Underwear, no matter how lovely, will not help when the look of your body naked is upsetting you nor will body lotion!

I really think it is worth at least going to see a cosmetic surgeon to discuss what might be possible. You have (likely) a long life ahead if you, it will be a more difficult one if you feel sad and upset every time you take your clothes off.

You don't have to have your nipples removed to have your breasts lifted.

I don't know how old your youngest is but you've had three and lost a lot of weight, give your body time to adjust. Moisturise and wear a good bra and see how you feel in a couple of years.

A friend of mine had a boob job after bf 4 babies.
She’s very happy with it.

Do what makes you happy.

Dh is the same. He said they are lovely because they are part of me. Part of me that changed due to mothering his dcs. He compliments me daily. I struggle to accept this though for some reason as I hate me