To feel pleased that neighbour’s kids are being pulled out of private school?

I went to private school. Loved it. But the main thing that was important in my upbringing was my family and how we were brought up. I've brought my children up the same way. Both currently at an incredible state primary (that feels very much like a private school) and will be going to a decent state high school.

There's two private schools I could have considered. I chose neither as frankly they're crap compared to the state school. Thought the Heads were out of touch with the real world.

My private education was peaceful, if that's the right word. I did have a culture shock when I went to a regular sixth form college. But guess what, still ended up hanging around with other 'nice' children.

Trust me, your upbringing is far more important. This child will still do very well as the type of parent who values private education will still be providing opportunites for their child to succeed.

I think this post just proves your jealous and spiteful. If you want your kids to have a better education work harder to pay for it perhaps, you're telling me if you had the chance to send your kids private you wouldn't because you believe all kids should start at the same place? Many of us can't afford to send our kids private but we certainly don't begrudge anyone else sending their kids.

Gosh, what a hideous unpleasant thing to say!

@grengat thank the lord you are not my neighbour!! you are a really nasty individual!

Wow, only a viscous and vindictive person could celebrate that a child’s life/schooling will be completely upended because they’re pissed at the mother.

Fingers crossed your neighbour/DH gets a promotion and the child is able to stay on after all.

This.. 💯

Grim. If anything sums up the race to the bottom it's this.

Also, you're not "friends", even with the qualifying "ish" - you clearly don't like them at all.

Yes. Life is unfair. We all have different chances. Not better, not worse but different depending on ability, personality and where we are born/ who are parents are. But education is the only thing we have to attempt to level the playing field. We should all have the same chance to achieve in whatever it is we want or are good at. This is why we should no longer see private schools as charities. They are not. I see so much good in my two teens from sending them to our local school. They are resilient, they need to make the effort to learn, they have to be supported with ASN by law. As a teacher I can see what a huge difference more funding will make. More adults in the classrooms would raise attainment massively.

I agree with you that I am pleased to hear some parents having to pipe down. I’m not pleased that children have to change their lives and friendship groups. I hear that Y5s and 6s are smaller year groups nationally so things might even out as there are more spaces in state schools.

in the words of the desiderata, ‘avoid loud and aggressive persons. They are vexatious to the spirit.’ (And quietly know the things can only get better.)

Of course this actually happened ☺️
or maybe you’re just posting propaganda for how horrible and smug pp parents are and how they deserve to be “taken down a peg or two”. I hope they take the places from some obviously extremely better deserving local paupers

This sums up the whole private school debate for me. Very unpleasant.

This is what I was thinking.

Misinformation and scaremongering. Low birth years coming through amongst other reasons why this isn't guaranteed to happen.

No one feels like this and shares it with the rest of the world, this surely cannot be real. Maybe it's the kind of thread that does reverse psychology? Perhaps, the OP wants people to feel appalled at her and therefore at anyone who is for PS VAT.

You sound bitter and vindictive. If you were that bothered you could have disengaged years ago. You’re not obliged to talk to your neighbours.

If you don’t believe in private education, fine. But if it bothered you that much, you had years to reduce this relationship to the odd nod of hello when you’re taking the bins out. Instead you’ve seethed for five years and are now gleeful that a child is having to change schools, which can be a disruptive experience. It’s not your neighbour who comes off poorly here.

Nasty.

I’m sure someone has already mentioned this but I am pretty sure you won’t feel so smug when your children’s class sizes rocket.

Its not going to happen though

And plenty of private school parents can't see anything wrong with their outlook on life

When he starts at the new school be sure to ask lots of questions about it at every opportunity. Maybe even ask if she still keeps in touch with the mums at the private school 😂

@Bananagirl23 I think that's exactly it. Having made the choice to pay for private education, it's understandable parents want to feel secure in their choices. Sadly, in some people, that turns into bragging

I can understand stretching for a house purchase because (in theory) house prices rise, wages rise etc so the LTV falls and in the worst case scenario the house can be sold and you downsize to something more affordable. But stretching to the limit for school fees makes no sense as if something has to "give" then its a childs education which to me is far too important to fuck about with. Surely its better to save the fees and spend it on educational experiences with holidays, trips etc, a tutor or study group....that sort of thing?

Mns advice re private education is to never stretch yourself in case you can no longer afford it.

Taking pleasure in a kid going through that disruption … that’s really low OP.

Your attitude makes me feel sad, not just for human nature generally, but for you specifically and how you can’t even see what’s wrong about your outlook on life.

Couple of PP's have mentioned stretching to pay fees, which I dont get.

I can understand stretching for a house purchase because (in theory) house prices rise, wages rise etc so the LTV falls and in the worst case scenario the house can be sold and you downsize to something more affordable. But stretching to the limit for school fees makes no sense as if something has to "give" then its a childs education which to me is far too important to fuck about with. Surely its better to save the fees and spend it on educational experiences with holidays, trips etc, a tutor or study group....that sort of thing?

I genuinely cant see that its worth the risk, especially in recent years when the talk of VAT on fees has been knocking around for a while.

Just plain nasty.

State school parent here FWIW. Anyway, YABVU.

It makes me so sad that a grown adult is so driven by bitterness and envy that they delight in the upheaval of children being forced to change schools through no fault of their own.

I can see that the gloating would be annoying TBH. I’ve spoken to several mums who’ve moved their DC from state to private who brag constantly about how much better their private school is than state - I don’t understand the need to show off about how great their school is to people who really can’t afford it (like me). Perhaps it’s a need to justify the extra expense?