Being deliberately ignored

This is pathetic. Why get worked up over a work colleague. Shes not a personal friend so forget it

In exjob I worked with a manager like that for four years. Looked through me if I said good morning, never started a conversation (but oddly was always OK talking about work). No idea what her problem was but it was her problem as far as I was concerned.

As long as she did what I needed her to do workwise I didn't care.

I would say hello or good morning so as she doesn’t think you’re in the slightest bit bothered and but make her think she has any power over you but not wait for a reply. She’s honestly not worth being worried about as nature adults don’t behave that way.

But why is it ‘triggering’? It’s mildly rude, sure, but it’s the kind of thing that merits a ‘Oh, weird!’ and barely another thought, surely?

I’ve said this on here before, but I once had a nice, quite lengthy conversation with a woman at the village playground, who then completely blanked me every time she saw me afterwards, and thought I must have unintentionally offended her. Until someone told me a year later that she had badly impaired vision (couldn’t drive etc), and simply wouldn’t have been able to see me unless I was less than about two feet away.

We're all so very different in our temperaments so what 1 person can do another would shudder to...but personally I would ask her if I've offended her in some way as she seems to be upset with me/ignoring me. See what she says..

I have learnt that you never know what people have going on in there own lives that can cause anguish, grumpiness and even rudeness etc. I've also learnt that most of the time its never personal, and the shitty behaviour is because the person generally doesn't like anyone and just has a bad attitude.

I understand that it can be upsetting, but try and brush it off. If you actually don't need to work with her then ignore.

I would ignore her and mirror what she does tbh.

I do this on the school run. Gave up trying to smile and be friendly with a few parents, if people look through me or look away then I mirror their behaviour back. It's childish but I feel great when I do it!

I'd say her name and ask if she was deliberately ignoring me.

Someone I used to work with and like very much used to walk past me and said hello in the street in our lunch break and I was so wrapped up in thought that I quite often genuinely didn't see him. He would say "You've done it again!" and we'd laugh about it.

A guard at the station said "Good morning!" to me this morning and I'd gone past her on the stairs before I registered that she was addressing me, looked back, apologised and said "Good morning!" to her.

Well said. Very true

No don't give her a hello when she's treating you like that. Just walk past her and ignore her. See how she likes it

I don't even say hello to people like this. I look right through or past them. In groups I talk to anyone except them. I am a very friendly easy going person but if someone wants to play mind games and status games I just have to ignore them. Too many nice, sane people in the world to get to know better without being sucked into the dance moves of the manipulators.

Is there a reason this is triggering / upsetting / hurting you so much? I understand being a bit over sensitive as I can be myself but I think this is too much.

I have people who don’t say hello back in my office blocks, yes it’s rude but I just stop saying hello and get on with my day

I would speak to her really loudly and obviously in front of everyone. “Good morning Jane, how are you today?” And stand staring at her waiting for a response. She will make herself look like an idiot.

If you got on before then has something happened? Could someone have stirred a rumour that you said something Asher or did you do a minor faux pas?

We had one at work. She’d been manipulating and bullying by silent treatment for 30 years. Created a terrible atmosphere which I assume was the plan. Never challenged by management. I assume she’s still there to this day doing it

Could she have difficulty with face recognition? I do; and sometimes people have thought that I was deliberately looking away when I just failed to spot them.

If you're quite sure that this isn't the case, then it's impolite of her, but may not be directed at you specifically. Some people seem to think that any interaction in the workplace, howeve brief, outside of designated times is a sinful and dangerous distraction to be avoided at all costs.

Don't worry about it op it's her problem not yours. Just keep smiling and saying hello to annoy her.

Why do you care so much? It sounds like you are a bit over invested in this relationship - could that be why she has backed right off? I can't imagine memorising a light hearted chat with a colleague, or getting so upset that someone has not said hello back to me

Personally I would keep saying hello to her. Childish people like that have a habit of twisting thing and could potentially end up claiming that you are ignoring her.