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AIBU?

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AIBU to “steal” this?

940 replies

AmiABadPersonn · 24/06/2024 20:43

Hello everyone I just want your opinions on this as today I’ve been in a heated argument with my friend as to wether I am unreasonable or not.

I am off work on maternity leave so the funds are tight at minute. There is a man who lives near me I believe he is drug user, he sells half price stuff and also takes orders on what you want for half price. He knocks on my house about 1 or 2 times a week with a bag of half price goods. I always buy washing detergent and softeners from him because you can get a whole weeks laundry of the nice brands for around £10. Money is tight as I have just had a baby and I have 2 other children with my husband also. i also sometimes get baby milk formula from him if I’m running low because it’s cheap.

I feel like this is not wrong because if I didn’t buy it other people would. Even if no one bought it he would steal it anyway in hopes someone would buy it eventually.

Today my friend was at my house when he came so I offered her to have a look what he had. She immediately asked him where he got this stuff from and he replied “shop”. She didn’t say much after but when I finished buying my items she started shouting about how I’m funding his drugs addiction and I shouldn’t support it because I am now stealing too. I told her to relax it’s fine it’s only a couple of items. She didn’t say much and finished her coffee and left quick.

So am I morally wrong for this? Or would you do the same?

OP posts:
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8
Caterpillarshoes · 26/06/2024 11:10

Fishcake15 · 24/06/2024 20:46

Moral compass goes out of the window when you need and can't afford baby milk.

Breastfeed / don't have another baby if money is so tight you can't feed it?

Its abhorrent to justify stealing from a shop.

DwarfBeans · 26/06/2024 11:02

Here's a thought OP. How about you ring your local police station and ask their advice on the matter 😂

inamarina · 26/06/2024 10:47

Coatsoff42 · 26/06/2024 08:35

I do think there is a deterioration in society and a loss of trust in institutions, businesses etc over the last 20 years maybe? No one has any personal affection for businesses who are seen as entirely profit hungry, customer manipulating, impersonal mega corps. They aren’t friendly family owned shops, or rosey cheeked producers selling you food.
The legal system has no respect it’s clogged up and slowed down. The government is ‘one rule for them, another rule for us’ There’s no community or support for people struggling with unemployment or depression or ill health, it’s very dog eat dog.
I think all these factor into OP thinking it’s ok to buy stolen goods. It’s not ok, but I can understand a decline in trust and personal honour when it seems like everything you interact with is out to rip you off.

I can see your point about people feeling disillusioned and mistrustful, but I think it can also be easily used as an excuse.
People like to criticise big corporations, but then go and order stuff from Amazon because it’s so convenient.
If you don’t like huge faceless enterprises, why not try to support small local businesses whenever possible? The friendly family-owned businesses still exist, and by the way, people quite happily steal from them too.
And as for the big chains - several posters on this thread who either work in retail themselves or know someone who does have explained how much stress shoplifters create for them.
It’s not the Tesco CEO who’s suffering most here, it’s the minimum wage workers.

Coatsoff42 · 26/06/2024 08:35

I do think there is a deterioration in society and a loss of trust in institutions, businesses etc over the last 20 years maybe? No one has any personal affection for businesses who are seen as entirely profit hungry, customer manipulating, impersonal mega corps. They aren’t friendly family owned shops, or rosey cheeked producers selling you food.
The legal system has no respect it’s clogged up and slowed down. The government is ‘one rule for them, another rule for us’ There’s no community or support for people struggling with unemployment or depression or ill health, it’s very dog eat dog.
I think all these factor into OP thinking it’s ok to buy stolen goods. It’s not ok, but I can understand a decline in trust and personal honour when it seems like everything you interact with is out to rip you off.

inamarina · 26/06/2024 08:25

a222 · 26/06/2024 07:54

i said on a wider scale.

also, i never said that.
my point was maybe stolen goods having such a huge market, not just op, may reflect some wider issues in our society.

But for a society to work individuals also need to take responsibility for their own actions and not just blame the government and expect them to fix everything all the time.
If everyone started stealing because “there are bigger issues” we’d end up in a right mess.
I see it in a local town - high levels of shop lifting over the last couple of years, the result is a town full of empty shop units because many businesses decided to close down or move elsewhere. It’s not rocket science really.
There might be a huge market for stolen goods, but like OP’s case shows it’s not necessarily always because people can’t afford basic essentials.
Go ahead and steal branded stuff you feel you’re entitled to - don’t be surprised if business increase prices to recoup lost profits or simply close down.

a222 · 26/06/2024 07:57

Runnerinthenight · 25/06/2024 23:47

Ah jesus christ that is scraping the bottom of the barrel!!

honestly the absolute pile on this thread has become, is actually breaking up the barrel and selling it for scrap.

a222 · 26/06/2024 07:56

ByNavyOtter · 25/06/2024 23:43

Christ I knew you'd mention war. Honestly wow if you think that crime is okay as long as its not war. How ridiculous.

read my reply again, i don’t quite think you grasped where i said ‘on a wider scale’.

a222 · 26/06/2024 07:54

inamarina · 25/06/2024 22:46

So because there are two wars going on elsewhere it’s okay to steal nonessential goods in the UK? And because social care is lacking OP is somehow entitled to branded stuff she can’t really afford?
All the excuses in the world just to avoid any kind of responsibility for one’s actions 😵‍💫

i said on a wider scale.

also, i never said that.
my point was maybe stolen goods having such a huge market, not just op, may reflect some wider issues in our society.

a222 · 26/06/2024 07:51

Runnerinthenight · 25/06/2024 23:44

You really haven't. You aren't that significant, you are nothing. I just can't abide thieves or their apologists.

and yet here you are, replying again with your vainglorious attitude.

MissTrip82 · 26/06/2024 02:10

I mean yeah it’s stealing.

Only you know how desperate your need is.

I don’t think anyone who can’t afford to feed their children is buying scented laundry pods and so on.

Lyraloo · 26/06/2024 01:31

Runnerinthenight · 25/06/2024 23:46

She must be very stupid if she didn't realise that she would get pushback on her support for criminality!

I think you've hit the nail on the head…. Very stupid, just about covers it!

PyongyangKipperbang · 26/06/2024 00:59

Runnerinthenight · 25/06/2024 23:49

I understand irony. Probably much more than you. This wasn't it.

Edited

Nah you dont, you just....dont!

Simpsonsfan · 26/06/2024 00:27

Runnerinthenight · 25/06/2024 23:45

You might as well be. Have a fucking word with yourself.

Oh chill out. You'll give yourself a nosebleed.

Runnerinthenight · 25/06/2024 23:49

PyongyangKipperbang · 25/06/2024 19:59

Well as someone who actually understands irony, I thought it was very funny and well observed.

I understand irony. Probably much more than you. This wasn't it.

Runnerinthenight · 25/06/2024 23:47

a222 · 25/06/2024 22:34

uhh…maybe on a wider scale the two wars currently going on.

and maybe stolen goods and ‘drug addicts’ being pretty much an epidemic reflects how this country is lacking in social care.

Ah jesus christ that is scraping the bottom of the barrel!!

Runnerinthenight · 25/06/2024 23:46

Lyraloo · 25/06/2024 23:03

I see she’s gone very quiet now and only commenting on posts where people agree with her! I don’t think she was expecting the backlash from decent, honest folk!

She must be very stupid if she didn't realise that she would get pushback on her support for criminality!

Runnerinthenight · 25/06/2024 23:45

Simpsonsfan · 25/06/2024 23:25

I'm not the one stealing 🤣🤣🤣 have a day off will you.

You might as well be. Have a fucking word with yourself.

Runnerinthenight · 25/06/2024 23:44

a222 · 25/06/2024 22:28

what?? lol i’ve really got ur knickers in a twist haven’t i

life isn’t perfect, there’s far worse going on than someone saving money in the CoL crisis by buying dodgy detergent.

You really haven't. You aren't that significant, you are nothing. I just can't abide thieves or their apologists.

ByNavyOtter · 25/06/2024 23:43

a222 · 25/06/2024 22:34

uhh…maybe on a wider scale the two wars currently going on.

and maybe stolen goods and ‘drug addicts’ being pretty much an epidemic reflects how this country is lacking in social care.

Christ I knew you'd mention war. Honestly wow if you think that crime is okay as long as its not war. How ridiculous.

PyongyangKipperbang · 25/06/2024 23:39

Simpsonsfan · 25/06/2024 23:25

I'm not the one stealing 🤣🤣🤣 have a day off will you.

No but without scumbags like you, scumbags like him wouldnt have a market.

Judge a [person] by the company [they] keep.

Simpsonsfan · 25/06/2024 23:25

Runnerinthenight · 24/06/2024 22:08

Well I can look myself in the mirror with a clear conscience. I am way happier on mine.

I'm not the one stealing 🤣🤣🤣 have a day off will you.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 25/06/2024 23:11

I’m afraid I also think scent balls are a total waste of money, and fabric conditioner/ softener is a luxury. You don’t need either.

And they don’t even smell very nice - I really sure the smell of laundry that’s had scent added to it.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 25/06/2024 23:08

Thing is, it is handling stolen goods, and it would be quite easy for the police and the courts to decide that you “must have known” it was stolen, because where else would he have got it from?

And you do know, for the same reason - it’s completely obvious.

So you could end up in a lot of trouble.

Lyraloo · 25/06/2024 23:03

ByNavyOtter · 25/06/2024 19:55

Oh god the irony, there isn't going to be fewer drug addicts with people like the Op exploiting the drug users and getting them more and more hooked on drugs are there? The sad thing is people like Op who have baby after baby wanting hand outs and freebies are in more of a fortunate position than they will ever know or appreciate. You're lucky if you're ABLE to work for what you have, that's why people hate thief's so much. It undermines everyone else's hard work and is so entitled and brattish. The op sees this man as just a drug user who's chosen to ruin his life so she can exploit him. He would've been the same as her baby once upon a time... what bought him to this? Hardship she can probably never even imagine. Society is fucked because of people like Op who consider themselves more important than others and she is even brave enough to shoplift herself.

I see she’s gone very quiet now and only commenting on posts where people agree with her! I don’t think she was expecting the backlash from decent, honest folk!

inamarina · 25/06/2024 22:46

a222 · 25/06/2024 22:34

uhh…maybe on a wider scale the two wars currently going on.

and maybe stolen goods and ‘drug addicts’ being pretty much an epidemic reflects how this country is lacking in social care.

So because there are two wars going on elsewhere it’s okay to steal nonessential goods in the UK? And because social care is lacking OP is somehow entitled to branded stuff she can’t really afford?
All the excuses in the world just to avoid any kind of responsibility for one’s actions 😵‍💫

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