Met his ex now I'm really sad

You poor thing. Low self esteem is horrible. I have had it all my life, but the older I get the less it rules my life, you'll find that as well.

Just remember, you are NOT competing with her. They have both moved on. He is with you. He WANTS to be with you. Please don't push him away. Stop asking questions about the past, you'll only twist yourself in knots about it.

It’s hard to get a perspective of your relationship from what you’ve said, as it’s all from the perspective of your fixation on his ex.

Take her out of the equation, focus on whether you want a relationship with this man based on how you feel together and how good he is as a partner.

Honestly? It doesn't sound like the relationship is the best. Nothing to do with how objectively attractive you are but you don't have great chemistry, you haven't been together long and it doesn't sound like you are each other's great love. Would you agree? Would you feel you were settling for him or being settled for?

You are very young and you have been with this man for LESS THAN A YEAR. You don’t have great sex, he likes stuff you don’t, he doesn’t make you feel special? You should throw him back and keep looking. The right person is out there for you but you won’t find him if you try to hang on to someone who is this wrong for you. The right person will be mad about you and your looks. I look like a bag of old potatoes at this point, 33 years into my relationship, snd my husband still finds me massively attractive (yes, Im puzzled by it myself).

The point Im trying to make is that you shouldn’t be feeling this insecure in a relationship.

I too want to hug you. Bear in mind pregnancy hormones can definitely magnify sadness. Give yourself time to think. Whatever you chose will be the right choice. But truly this should be the honey moon period. Chemistry is there or it's not. And I am sure you are beautiful!

We have discussed this before as sexual chemistry is definitely something we lack, he's more adventurous and kinky than I am.

^

Here we go again

He sounds pretty spiteful tbh

Oh the sex was so good, etc

Whatever. He didn't need to rave on and on about that, how else are you supposed to feel now??

This is very sad. Pregnancy brain is real (I’m not saying your emotions aren’t) but pregnancy mucks with your brain from the start.

you are beautiful I’m sure. He likes you for you. Tell him and take it from there, take her out of the conversation and talk to him. Good luck.

I would love to give you a big hug, you sound so sad. Don't make any hasty decisions. Can you go away for a few days for some thinking time?

I really feel for you. I had low self esteem in my younger days and pregnancy hormones won't help.

I agree with a pp though, it doesn't sound like you're compatible, not emotionly nor sexually. Now you're feeling insecure and jealous too, it won't bode well for your relationship and it sounds unlikely you're going to end up together in the long run.

I think you need to take the boyfriend out of the equation when thinking about whether you want to have this baby.

Do you have supportive family/friends that can help you work through how you're going to proceed?

I think you need to spend a few days alone, try to relax and think about what you want to do. Pregnancy hormones will be making you feel a lot worse so you need to try and clear your head as much as you can.

I do however think that the relationship won’t last. There’s too many insecurities and he seems quite emotionally shut off.

He will probably still be thinking this girl is the one who got away years down the line to make himself feel better for any future failed relationships.

If you’re lacking sexual chemistry now, that also won’t get better. You should still be in the honeymoon period and not be able to keep your hands off each other.

Given he’s also house sharing he probably isn’t ready to be a parent. Again, I could be wrong but what really matters is what you want to do. It’s likely if you go ahead with the pregnancy you’re going to end up a single parent. You need to consider that scenario and if you still want to go ahead then you should have the baby. I definitely agree with you waiting to tell him until you’re sure what you want to do first.

You sound like you have low self esteem and are a bit insecure, why do you keep asking him about his past relationships? Does he make you fell good about yourself?

He sounds immature and insensitive,or he may be fed up with you asking these sorts of questions. Either way, you are beautiful and worthy, he should be telling you this rather than his past loves and you should have more belief in yourself.

I had asked about previous relationship before and very early asked "tell me about the best sex you've ever had". I ask this to get to know about what he likes.

Asking questions like that are a lose/lose proposition. His past sexual experiences are none of your business, and any answer he gives is going to make you feel less than.

Anyway, you really need to think about what you want for your future, because it has barely begun. Your relationship with him isn't great, regardless that he's seemingly a decent person. You don't have a good emotional connection, nor do you have very good sexual chemistry. That does not bode well, at all.

If you decide to continue this pregnancy, you have to be resigned to the fact that you will probably end up being a single mother.

Aw, you're beautiful for you, and she isn't perfect.

Please bear in mind pregnancy can make you feel vulnerable. Can you have a cuddle day (just curl up by yourself) to think about the pregnancy etc with no interruptions?