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Just found out I’m pregnant I must be over 30 weeks I am scared!

517 replies

Goldflamingo · 23/06/2024 13:20

Hi posting here as this thread seems to get the most traction.

I found out I was pregnant this morning. I haven’t had periods for 2 years as I’ve been on the pill and they’ve stopped them. I had no symptoms until recently. My belly is tiny, I’ve lost weight. I have been feeling so sick and dizzy, Saturday I went to a theme park with my daughter, I fainted and was sick everywhere. The medic came over and asked if there was any chance I could be pregnant and I laughed it off. I recovered and we went home.

Today I thought oh I will just take a test to rule it out. I was going shopping anyway so I didn’t specifically set out to buy a test, I just grabbed one with my shopping. I fully expected it to say negative, I was just doing it to humour myself. I knew there was an extremely slim chance but I was 99.99% sure it would be negative. I didn’t even look for 20 minutes as I was adamant it was a waste of time and would be negative. But no, two lines appeared. Because I left it so long I thought a possible false positive so I went out and got 6 more including a digi. All were dark positive and the digi said pregnant.

I went in to panic mode. I have not had sex in 30 weeks, the last time I had sex was November the 24th. I was dating somebody and things broke up after a few months as he moved abroad. I have not had sex or even dated since.

I called EPU, I explained the whole situation and they’ve said as I’m over 16 weeks, they can not take me under their care and I need to do an online referral for a midwife and urge the importance of the situation in my online referral. I have done an online referral and stressed they contact me asap. I can not find a direct number for the midwife’s, only the number for antenatal day Assesment unit. I don’t know what I should do, do I just go to a&e. Do I wait until the midwife’s have got back to me?

I am so scared. For all I know there’s more than one baby, the baby could be sick, the placenta could have developed incorrectly, the baby could be deformed, the baby could have a disability. Anything; because I haven’t been checked! So now I’m worrying!

I also drink a bottle of wine most weekends.

I am terrified something would have gone wrong but I’m in limbo until the midwife’s contact me back after they’ve received my referral. I don’t know what to do, do I go to A&E?? Am I going to be in trouble for not knowing until now?

I feel so uncomfortable sat here doing nothing about it until they’ve got back to me when I’m anywhere from 30-36 weeks pregnant. My other daughter was born at 33 weeks so I’m worrying!!!

please what do I do??? Do I go to a&e???

OP posts:
Godesstobe · 23/06/2024 19:42

I am so glad you are in safe hands and getting the care you need. Very best wishes for the future!

Bristolnewcomer · 23/06/2024 19:41

Hope all the results come back as well as possible, you sound like a lovely mum and some day I hope you are glad this happened. My friend had the same - went into early Labour with her little one. One thing she’d say to anyone is that it will be a huge shock for you so - when you can - maybe try to speak to someone like your GP or a counsellor about it to unpack your feelings. You might not be able to say everything you’re thinking to your family. Xx

Americano75 · 23/06/2024 19:40

Bless you love, what a shock for you. It sounds like you've got lots of support around you which is wonderful, not to mention all the love here for you. Lots of hands to hold yours.

ScrollingLeaves · 23/06/2024 19:40

All best wishes to you and your family, OP.

TokyoSushi · 23/06/2024 19:39

Wow. sending strength, you're going to be ok Flowers

Stripeysocks1981 · 23/06/2024 19:38

Sounds like you’re in good hands OP. Take care x

WaystarRoy · 23/06/2024 19:38

Thanks for updating us. Lots of people here are wishing you well x

BiscuityBoyle · 23/06/2024 19:37

Thank you for taking the time to update. I’m sending you love, hugs and strength.

MaryMack · 23/06/2024 19:37

Sending love and hugs 🥰

Lolabear38 · 23/06/2024 19:36

Oh gosh! What a rollercoaster for you! Hope
you're ok x

Emma543 · 23/06/2024 19:34

Can’t imagine how you must be feeling. Best wishes to you and your family xx

MaryMaryVeryContrary · 23/06/2024 19:33

Thank you for updating us OP and I’m very glad you’re being looked after and they’ve carried out all the necessary tests at speed 💐

ChishiyaBat · 23/06/2024 19:33

Get some rest, sending wishes for you and the baby's good health💐

Sausagedog101 · 23/06/2024 19:32

BirthdayRainbow · 23/06/2024 19:32

I'm so sorry you find yourself in this situation. You have options but for now try and rest.

OP, I don't know what to say. Sending you lots of love and hugs. I can only imagine the shock you must be in. Take good care of yourself xx

BirthdayRainbow · 23/06/2024 19:32

I'm so sorry you find yourself in this situation. You have options but for now try and rest.

Floralnomad · 23/06/2024 19:31

Best wishes @Goldflamingo 💐

Goldflamingo · 23/06/2024 19:28

Hi
Just thought I’d update everyone. I’m in a bed and was scrolling through my emails and saw all of the notifications so figured I’d post an update.

I have been seen and I’m currently on the antenatal ward. They did a urine test and a blood test for lots of other things like iron level. Urine test positive, blood test still waiting on. When I got here, they took a urine test then felt my stomach and put a doppler on. They estimated around 25 weeks (which wasn’t possible)

Consultant (I’m under consultant care due to previous preterm birth) came round with portable ultrasound machine. Did a scan and I am measuring 33 weeks and 3 days, baby is head down.

I am having an ultrasound tomorrow morning to check exact measurements and organs of the baby etc. They said todays scan was just to confirm gestation. I will also have a cervical length internal ultrasound to check my cervix length.

I have had an internal exam. They’ve said my cervix is closed which is good. They’ve done two swabs, one to check my waters have broken and one to check if the risk of preterm labour is likely. Waters haven’t gone but the fibronectin test came back positive.

My sisters gone home as I’ve been admitted and will likely be here until my pain has gone which is a little worse and they’ve given me codeine. They’ve said I can be discharged tomorrow assuming the pain is gone and my cervical length is ok. If my cervix is short or the pain is persisting I have to stay in. They’ve said if my cervix is short or I show signs of labour before 36 weeks then they will administer the steroid injections.

Worried at the moment of the unknown. Worried I could go in to labour at any point as this is how my other labour started (albeit a lot faster) dull pains and a closed cervix to extreme contractions and an open cervix within hours. So at the moment I’m just sitting tight and they’ve said to see what happens.

Really not ideal and I don’t want this at all and nor will the father but I’m not thinking of him and don’t plan to inform him yet as need to get my head together. Don’t know what will happen next but I know I have supportive family and I will try to make the best of this situation I guess

OP posts:
Londonrach1 · 23/06/2024 19:20

Right op firstly what happened in the past is in the past.....now is today... book yourself for a scan asap, private if you can afford it. Congratulations...sounds like you amazing mum.

Cosmicdreams · 23/06/2024 19:17

Congratulations op, I saw a thread on here a while back of a lady in a very similar position, on birth control found out she was pregnant quite late on and went on to have a successful birth. I hope its going well in hospital ❤️ Flowers

bananaphon · 23/06/2024 19:14

Stripeysocks1981 · 23/06/2024 19:10

@Hello38 aIm not even reading your cruel, unkind and unhelpful posts anymore. I’m reporting them because I actually think you’re a troll. Nobody is so thick to genuinely post the things that you are. So I suspect you’re being intentionally nasty and spiteful. What a sad life you must lead.
I encourage others to just report her posts. Don’t engage, it’s what she wants.

OP, I hope you’ve been seen in triage and are feeling a bit more positive and reassured 💐

I've reported quite a lot of the posts and they've been deleted thankfully. Still some to go though.

Stripeysocks1981 · 23/06/2024 19:10

@Hello38 aIm not even reading your cruel, unkind and unhelpful posts anymore. I’m reporting them because I actually think you’re a troll. Nobody is so thick to genuinely post the things that you are. So I suspect you’re being intentionally nasty and spiteful. What a sad life you must lead.
I encourage others to just report her posts. Don’t engage, it’s what she wants.

OP, I hope you’ve been seen in triage and are feeling a bit more positive and reassured 💐

Hayl777 · 23/06/2024 18:49

Hi OP,
Hope you have managed to get someone to see you. Presenting at A&E may be an option, especially as you have already disclosed you are currently on Lithium and therefore presumably under Psych care, I can only image that this turmoil would be enough to knock anyone’s resilience.
It may also be worth noting that although rare, many antipsychotics can cause false positives on home pregnancy tests.

Sloejelly · 23/06/2024 18:44

Grapewrath · 23/06/2024 18:26

Some of the comments are really unhelpful.
FAS is rare even when the mother drinks to excess. My mum is an alcoholic and neither me nor my siblings have it.
Obviously drinking in pregnancy isn’t great but the chances are 4 glasses of wine a week won’t cause an issue.

FAS is actually not that rare. A study in Manchester found a prevalence of up to 3.6% (equivalent to a child in every primary class). There is no ‘safe’ amount of alcohol - though the impact will depend on a range of factors and the more drunk the higher the risk. But whatever the risk, what done is done and if you didn’t know you were pregnant there is not a lot you could do. Some children arrive with challenges for a whole host of reasons and they still make us proud.
https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/foetal-alcohol-spectrum-disorder/

nhs.uk

Foetal alcohol spectrum disorder

Find out about foetal alcohol spectrum disorder, which is a range of mental and physical problems that can affect a child if their mother drinks alcohol while pregnant.

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/foetal-alcohol-spectrum-disorder/

Zanatdy · 23/06/2024 18:40

Some terrible comments. Talk about kicking someone when they are down. I’m sure that a few glasses of wine a week will be fine. I do hope the hospital can find out how far along you are and check you’re not in labour. You’ve still got options if you’re not in a position to have another child (obviously given the gestation I’m talking about adoption) but give yourself some time to come to terms with it all.

GenghisCalm · 23/06/2024 18:38

This reply has been withdrawn

Message removed as it quotes a deleted post.