Bit of background here: MIL has always been rather inconsiderate of our privacy and used to constantly doorstep us without notice. She was asked repeatedly by DH to call first but it would fall on deaf ears and she just continued doing as she pleased. Many a romantic moment before kids was ruined by this...!! She also 'coincidentally' booked her holiday one year to the same place we were going on honeymoon, at the same time. Who does that?!
Anyway, in a few weeks we are due to go to my niece's wedding (no kids allowed) and as all of my family will be there, she has agreed to babysit our DS overnight. She regularly has her other son's kids stay over and has done for years, but has never had our DS who is now 4.
I mentioned to DH about the big sleepover weekend coming up soon and he replied that MIL wants to stay at our house to look after DS, as all his things, toys, etc are here. Now I do get that, but as we are taking our newborn to this wedding, we are selling the idea to the 4 year old DS as an adventure, a sleepover at nanny's like his cousins have. The other issue is that we no longer have a spare bed, so DH seems to think that she can sleep in our marital bed. This is a big no-no for me, especially given how much she has overstepped our privacy in the past this seems like the ultimate invasion. And just weird tbh.
So my 3 issues are:
- The unfairness that BIL's kids get to sleep at hers all the time, go for dinner there regularly, yet our DS has never had this (BIL also lives nearby).
- The thought of my MIL sleeping in the bed that we shag in, when she's already ruined our honeymoon and numerous amorous moments from persistently knocking the door unannounced.
She only lives a 10 minute walk down the road so it's not like she can't pop in to grab toys/clothes if needed as she has a key.
- We are taking the newborn, so I don't want it to look like we have left DS in our house but taken his brother out of choice.
AIBU?