Condescending phrases (lighthearted)

Well done you!
Well done that woman! (me)
or
head tilted to one side - ‘you’re really quite intelligent aren’t you’
obviously this said by someone who doesn’t know me well ha ha

years ago, a professional pick up and deliver ironing lady,
when I asked her not to fold a circular tablecloth into a triangle,
said,
“you’re very fussy for someone who lives in a flat”
the week before she had admired my hall lamp, saying
“you have surprisingly good taste for someone who lives in a council flat”

now that is condescending! patronising and as it transpired,
professionally suicidal

Also patronising is if a man tells you that you have a good sense of humour,
or worse, a good personality, usually because he feels a deficit elsewhere,
when he should really keep his comments to himself, pay for the drink, end
the encounter politely, sigh

There's a newish one that absolutely sounds so insincere and condescending no matter who says it. You say something mildy pleasing that has happened to you:

'Yay! Love that for you'.

I don't know why but it makes me feel so patronised. Maybe because it's usually said to me by colleagues younger than me. Along with 'You're smashing it'.

Oh piss off.

I hate that every one says ‘honestly’ on MN now. ‘Honestly, it’s not that hard’, ‘Honestly, you’re being unhelpful, ‘Honestly be kind’.

I wish all the honestlys would piss off.

I agree. I like the lighthearted threads, but they never end up that way most of the time. An OP had one that was "show me pictures of your normal kitchen" or something close to that. It was quite nice seeing everyones pictures then come the posters "Oh well now you've done it. You'll immediately be robbed and murdered because now people know what your kitchen looks like and can track you down you fools"

With due respect.

While I find this a bit cringey, I think it primarily notes the OPs intent, of which she is the judge.

Whether threads so marked play out that way is another matter!

But equally, if people start such a thread and don't mark it as 'light-hearted', they get told off too!

It's a bit like the MN lore that male posters who don't identify themselves as such are deceitful pervs; but if they do, they're being mainsplainy, acting superior and seeking attention!

How can I help you? A friend when answering the phone. Every every time. Comes over as fuck off I'm busy. They're not and are a lovely person.

Keeping busy are you? Only arrived in my life after my DH died. Sod Off. No, I'm just having an ordinary life and don't need to fill the gaping void with shite while my heart is broken which by the way you never ask about

A friend who had this after a relationship ended was similarly hacked off by it. She took a punt and asked me was I on the receiving end too.

Don't be silly. To be fair I only encounter this on The Archers, where it is universal. So rude.

Not being quite light-hearted, but don't see the funny side of condescension.

And breathe

I'll raise you 'Good morning, Colleagues'.

Mate, this isn't fucking ASDA.

Pisses me off every Monday morning.

I find it hugely patronising and condescending when someone marks their Mumsnet post as "light-hearted".

Yeah, I'll be the judge of that, thanks...

I recently was given some unwanted and unsolicited financial advice in a High St bank. Luckily, as an ex IFA I knew the advice was absolute crap and complained.

A few days later the manager called me up. He blustered and made excuses and called me "sweetheart. He was sounded considerably younger than my son and I was horrified at how patronising he was.

When he eventually paused for breath I said (very politely) that he was wasting his breath. That it would be a cold day in hell before I ever set foot in his branch again, that I was closing my accounts and my dependent parents's accounts and that he shouldn't assume that a middle aged woman was a sweetheart. I also asked him to thank the customer advisor who had realised how badly I had been treated, advised me to raise a complaint and actually used the word "sorry'. I suggested he should use that word in future if he wants to retain customers.

hello/ hi there!’ (Neighbour - please just say my name - I am not called ‘there’!

I agree OP. Drives me nuts when you speak to neighbours and work colleagues who never address you by your name. Don't get me wrong, I find over-familiarity equally wrong but it's just so odd when some people completely avoid using your name even though they should know it, comes across as really ignorant.

'You Guys' just like 'You people'
It is a separation of speaker from the lower echelon.

You guys - when addressing a group made up partially/solely of females.

I hate the response "fair enough" or "fair play" as it seems dismissive and code for "not what I would do, but whatever".

It is what it is...

OP, you may find the person you are referring to condescending, but none of the examples you gave in your OP are particularly so on their own.

I find "You lot" condescending when it's used to judge a group of people, as if the one addressing the group is somehow superior.

I used to work part time as a midwife and people quite often said, oh good to keep your hand in!’

Firstly, it was bloody hard work and I was spinning a lot of plates, it wasn’t a hobby.

Secondly, it’s kind of an inappropriate thing to say to a midwife 🤣

I get the 'Hi there'
For me that is up there with 'You people'

'Fizbosshoes · Today 10:12
I'm really short and apparently this is an invite to many people, to treat me in a condescending manner.
I have been patted on the head like I'm.a bloody dog!!'

Ah, Bless! Legs it in never been trained in trainers

Yes, I know somebody exactly like this. I had to hand something very straightforward to her briefly the other day and I ended up 'getting Mavised' for half an hour