What think you?

If you're worried about 'being left on the street' (according to your other thread) now is the time to do something about it. Your partner is doing his best to stop that happening by giving you a life interest in his property, but if that's not enough, start saving so that you can have the cushion of your own money to rent again in future. At 55, you have working years ahead of you and if you have your partner's pension coming in as well as a wage, you should easily be able to build up some savings.

I think giving you a lifetime interest in the house given you met after retirement age for him is very generous. Of course he wants the bulk of his estate to go to his son. He sounds like a good dad, and probably a good person too if we can interpolate from this one data point.

YABU he is being extremely generous especially considering you have only been dating 6 months (!)

My grandma has the same deal with her partner of 20 years. He is younger than her and has one daughter. On the odd event he would die first, she has a right to live in the house until her death (he isn’t offering any pension though, so lucky you!) and upon her death his daughter would inherit. My grandma wouldn’t have it any other way and they have been together over two decades. In fact she has said to me multiple time that was he to die first she would vacate the property so his daughter could inherit ASAP as it’s his house and the right thing to do.

Bonkers to want to inherit a house you have never paid into from someone you barely know. I would be glad he wants to do the right thing by his child, so many fathers don’t. I would do the same if I was him, because that’s what makes the most sense and is right by all parties involved.

It's his house snd I wouldn't expect him to do any differently. I'd do exactly the same in his shoes.

Look on the bright side, if he does die you might have 24 hours to clean out his bank accounts and grab anything valuable from the property.

OP, you've started a new thread rather than replying to this one. Report it and ask MNHQ to delete it.

This is what life interest trusts are for and he is doing the right thing by his son.

It’s refreshing to hear of a man protecting his child’s inheritance from a potential gold digging later in life spouse….I think the life interest may be too generous, given that due to your age difference, you might not actually be that much older than the son

What would you want/expect to happen with his house after you die? Of course it should go to his son and he is just making sure that happens in case you live 20 years after him and arent especially close to his son living abroad 20 years after his dad died.

He wants the asset that he's worked for to go to his child. Good for him and I'd do exactly the same. YABU.

If you want your own assets you need to buy a house yourself.

I can't see the problem here. He's offering you lifetime security here.

I actually think he’s being stupidly generous here and the son should inherit the house immediately with no lifetime rent for you, which could deprive his son of the benefit for many years. You are practically a stranger so it’s pretty obvious what you want from the relationship. How embarrassing to have mentioned your boobs as assets - perhaps you should grow up and buy your own house.

But she is, in the most basic way, 'inheriting' the house.

She'll have the right to live in it until she dies. That could be another 40 years!With an income from his pension.

If she doesn't want to live in the house she doesn't have to, she just can't sell it and piss the money up the wall move and/or gradually breaking down the asset.
<shrug>

sensible to me. She's had no part in making the money for the house.

Of course he should leave his house to his son. If you have the right to live there till death, you're sorted for life (unless you envisage moving elsewhere, but that would be your issue).

Someone I know died unexpectedly and naturally left a percentage of their estate to their only child. They were married for a long time but no longer to the child's other parent. They co owned a house. The spouse was able to stay in the house for a limited time but it had to be sold after a while to release the inheritance to the child.

Surviving spouse railed against this despite keeping their share plus a portion from their partner, and having inherited from their own family previously. If it had been the other way round though, they would have left their estate to their own children, so were being pretty hypocritical about the whole thing. And made it very difficult for the grieving (grown up) child.

Two of my close family have made similar arrangements with their own wills/property. They outright own their own houses and their partners have not contributed to the mortgage. Unfortunately their partners will have to 'move on' should they pass away - the house being left to the children.

Eminently sensible, I think. I would be making a similar arrangement if I had to.

I think he's being generous letting you stay😂

I really don't know. I feel like marriage comes with the expectation that you're going to look after eachother. Especially with the age gap, you could spend a good chunk of your years as his carer, feels a bit unbalanced. But then would it be fair for you to have his life's work after a few years marriage? No.
I think so long as you have a lifetimes interest to live there you're benefitting aren't you, it doesn't matter to you who gets it after you die.
Dating later in life must be quite difficult and complicated.

Don't rush into this marriage. More for his sake than yours.

You are discussing this after a FEW MONTHS? God give me strength. I hope he damn well ensures his son is 100% protected from financial predators like you.

Sure as hell wouldn’t leave my house to some random bf / short term dh and leave my son homeless.
Actually wouldn’t let a 55 yr old live in it forever either, as it could stop my son inheriting or having any say in the property for 25 years.
Might give them a year to find somewhere else to live.

OP is there just you or do you have children of your own?

This sounds fair, especially given the age gap between you. If it were me I think I would want the option of being able to downsize when older, if it's a large house, and that would need to be covered in his will, with the release of equity to his son. I don't know if that is possible, I imagine there will be a way, and you don't want to have to have an agreement with his son to do that.

I think it sounds it’s the exactly right thing to do

Wills arent meant to be "romantic" they're meant to be practical, fair and sensible. Just in the same vein, noone likes to think about their house burning down but we still get insurance for it just in case. Thats life - if you walked around not thinking about anything because it wasnt "nice" then you'd end up in a right mess if the worst happened.

He's being very generous and it's normal for people to want their estate to go to their children- why wouldnt they?

I agree with PP, you are coming across quite grabby here expecting to inherit everything when you've only known him for 6 months. If you are implying it should all go to you and his son should get nothing then that reflects very poorly on you and it would make me question your motives for dating him in the first place.