Boyfriend wants me to put his car under my car insurance

I don't understand why people make excuses about being bad with money.

He is too lazy to take responsibility.

His problems are not your problems @CrossingBoundaries007 but he is trying to make them your problems.

Run.

If you want to be really nice you could just give him the money to pay for his own insurance ( though why a single mother should be paying for some bloke's insurance at the expense of her own DC I don't know) but for the reasons everyone else have given, don't link his insurance to yours or to your address.
Can you afford to send your DD to private school?

@CrossingBoundaries007 as a single mum, any money you give him means you have less for YOUR own dc. This man is a scrounger, a moocher and a hopeful cocklodger. All these financial problems he’s created and ‘shared’ with you are of his own making - please listen to all the good advice from every single pp. The only thing you should give him is a firm goodbye.

But now he's asking you to take responsibility for him being bad with money. That isn't right especially when he hasn't been honest about why he's in debt and isn't even discussing things with you but wants you to subsidise him. The private education is utterly ridiculous. He's spending thousands on that when he can't afford his own rent or insurance. Why is he paying his exes full rent anyway? Does she work? Does she claim benefits? Sorry to be the bearer of bad tidings but he's either an idiot or he thinks you might be one.

This one is so bad!

He is demonstrably a shit driver - but you have to ask why it’s a bad idea to insure him illegally (fronting) and when he crashes you’ll be investigated for insurance fraud and will lose your no claims…

As for the situation with his wife and kids… wow

just toxic all round!

I think it's best you end things with him. He's paying rent on his exs place, he can go live there if finances are bad and he's desperate. It's not your problem so don't make it yours. He got himself into this mess, so dont feel its your responsibility to help him, it will only get worse if you help him.

My husband is on my car insurance (multi car policy thingy) but… we are married….he doesn’t have a poor credit rating… he doesn’t have any points…. It was purely cheaper as I had more no claims years (my hubbys parents fault not his but that’s a story for another day)
font do it op, your bf has made some poor choices and wants you to pick up the flack, you don’t know how this could affect You in the future

I don't understand why you see this guy as a catch?
And why would you want to put your own and your childrens financial stability at risk by marrying him?

I just noticed your username 🙈🙈🙈
Crossing boundaries indeed....

What a mess.

Don't get involved.

You have dumped him before and you can do it again.

Why would you help is the better question.

He had overextended himself, this is his issue not yours. This will end up costing you money.

The idea of private education is that you are comfortable enough that it doesn't leave you stretched with other bills. If you can't pay your rent or insurance then you can't afford private education. Tell him he needs to free up the thousands he's throwing at private education if he can't afford his rent or insurance. He's being unreasonable.

Absolutely not. He's very irresponsible and I wouldn't want to be tried to that. He's irresponsible with money and he's irresponsible with his safety and the safety of others. He's also irresponsible because speeding and being Mr big bollcks on the road is more important that maintaining his lively hood.

He basically wants you to commit a fraud. He wants you to get insured in your name saying youre the main driver of the vehicle so he can get cheaper insurance. The premium will be shy high because of his driving record because he'll have to be named as a driver but not as high if he used his name alone. You'll be on the hook for the insurance for a year. He could lose his license anyway. He's so irresponsible it sounds like he'll loss it at some point anyway. Then he won't be able to get to work and you'll have to pay the bill.

Realistically, do you see a future with this guy? It's nice he wants to marry you but do you want to marry him? I would trust him at all.

I haven't found anyone else who I like I just don't get this comment OP? Why do you want to find someone else? If you're a single mum, you already have a family and someone who needs your love and care. Concentrate on your child(ren).

If anything happened to my DH, the last thing I'd be doing is trying to find someone else who I like - they might ruin the lovely family that I already have. I wouldn't want to do anything to jeopardise the happiness of my children, they are my world.

The issue is that when we met he told me about his bad credit. I wasn't really sure why but he had some debt

Take your pick

• becauseyou end up paying the insurance and it causes YOU credit issues as you struggle to pay
• because this kind of ask is step 1 of cocklodging 101
• because its vagina shrivelling that a grown able bodied man cannot supoirt himself
• because you have no idea how he accrued the debt (drugs, profligate spending)
• because its a bad idea to bail people out as they never learn to change their behaviour / solve their own issues.
• because via this you may give him enough info to start taking debt out in your name too

I could go on... and on.

I agree wholeheartedly with @ZekeZeke and @EatTheGnome get therapy and raise the bar. This guy sounds like a loser.

How does he even know you have the money to pay his insurance? You shouldn’t be sharing details of your finances with someone as shady and irresponsible as this.

If you do have the money to spare, it would be much better invested in savings for your child, or put towards something you and your child can enjoy.

Why are you considering subsidising his school fees and his ex living for free? Is that the best use of your money?

Aside from the legalities of this which is a huge waving red flag in itself

The fact you even need to ask tells me you need to work on your boundaries.

Aside from all the good points made by others, genuinely why would you see the carrot of marriage as a positive? I literally got a second hand stomach churn at the very thought of being legally financially enmeshed to that man.

Aside from the financial flags, it concerns me greatly that you belive his Good Guy story of paying all the exs bills and private school for his kids when he hasn't got two pennies to rub together. It's all a con man show. Of course he has to be nice to you, how else will he access your financial support?

If you marry him then you become legally responsible for his debt if he runs away. So of course he wants to marry you, wake up and ditch him.

Why do women fall for this trick every single time?

Oh gosh, OP, run a mile. There are way too many red flags here.

Because he’s a grown arsed man with no financial sense and a shit driver.

only one winner if you go ahead.

its not you.

If he's big enough to get into this situation, he's big enough to take steps to get out of it. 12 points on a driving licence - he's a liability.
Child in private school - take them out. Labour are reported as adding the VAT to fees in a budget inside 10 weeks and schools here are already working on fee change contingencies for the next instalment.

He’s chosen to put his child in private school but can’t even pay insurance on a car that he needs to work (to make money for the private schoo)??
How can you have respect for someone so stupid?
Why on earth would you lend money to someone who has their child in private school.
Make it make sense