6 year child - stranger talking about her penis

Totally unnecessary.
Personally at 6 I would have talked about willies (or pee-pees as we called them) but not with adults. So IF an adult had mentioned one it wouldn't have been a problem. But it would have been inappropriate.

This type of man will find any excuse to talk about his genitals. Best to keep your kids well away from him and any other men who claim to be women. Not just because of that, also the sexism in thinking women are just clothes worn, or merely a thought, or a male gaze fantasy. It's all so very wrong.

Agree with ponypatter. Op doesn't have to report it if she doesn't want to take the risk, but the word trans doesn't even have to be mentioned. Trans people (or poser trans people) are not above the law and normal standards of appropriate behavior around kids.

Oh come on . It's fucking weird to see a man , in this case a bearded man in a dress and so of course a six year old will ask. The man is a pervert . Grim.

I agree with the above post, especially this part

"I feel that we're in danger of conflating two separate issues here. One is the issue of men wearing women's clothes and calling themselves women, but the other is people who make inappropriate comments to children. These are separate issues"

OP I would 100% bring this up with HR and leave out any reference to a Trans person, I would be informing them that I was very very unimpressed and quite concerned at an adult discussing their genitalia with my 6 yr old child - completely inappropriate and they need to be told that and that under no circumstances should it ever happen again.

I completely understand why you’re making this decision.

It is so awful that he gets away with it. That we are being conditioned that this sort of disgusting behaviour is ok - because it isn’t.

I feel that we're in danger of conflating two separate issues here. One is the issue of men wearing women's clothes and calling themselves women, but the other is people who make inappropriate comments to children. These are separate issues, and it concerns me that some people are using one to disguise the other.

People who involve children in their sexual choices are dangerous. We shouldn't be making excuses for them, or letting them hide in plain sight at parties, or being afraid to challenge their inappropriate behaviour at parties.

Six year olds are allowed to be inquisitive. Live your life how you want but you must realise that in setting yourself apart you will attract attention, if you want kids to grow to be empathetic then answer their entirely reasonable question arising from their observations. Don’t shut them down.

All I am saying, notwithstanding all the objections - is that there are very many people across this issue - IMO & IME - who mean no harm. And the anger of either side doesn't help them.

They may mean no harm, but they do harm and they support others to harm. It’s like, tolerating slavery. You are supporting a situation that causes harm.

It harms the women whose privacy and boundaries are eroded, and it harms the children who wrongly believe they need surgery and life altering medication to make their body ‘right’.

Be kind, protect children and women from this insidious ideology.

As I said upthread, what's wrong with saying 'yes absolutely wear the dress if that makes you happy and you should not be stigmatised for that - but as you are still men, your sex based rights do not change'?

This is the simple common sense of the situation.

All I am saying, notwithstanding all the objections - is that there are very many people across this issue - IMO & IME - who mean no harm. And the anger of either side doesn't help them.

They may mean no harm, but that doesn't mean they should be given special rights that innocents have to 'suffer' for, as per what you've said earlier.

As I said upthread, what's wrong with saying 'yes absolutely wear the dress if that makes you happy and you should not be stigmatised for that - but as you are still men, your sex based rights do not change'?

I do empathize with all the main issues of concern.

I only want to move towards constructive discussion as IME, that is better in the long run, than fixed, extreme positions however plausible the positions are.

There are lots of actions which are extremely questionable and lots of institutional, medical, educational and legal/political capture which makes this a very complex embedded social movement.

All I am saying, notwithstanding all the objections - is that there are very many people across this issue - IMO & IME - who mean no harm. And the anger of either side doesn't help them.

Institutions must create logical rules, systems and data collection that is true - that is starting to happen I think at least in the UK.

Beyond that I can't remain angry despite all these arguments. I will try to do the right thing of course and speak up for women's rights as I always have.

I just don't think the issues are simple. The problems are obvious, the conflict is obvious - but the solutions are not easy although we must push for all rights to be protected and for those rights to be based on reality.

The obsession with gender binary in clothing, behaviour, jobs and toys etc is what has led to all this madness. People should be able to look how they like without society telling them that if the thing they like is pink they must be a girl.

I 100% agree with this.

This. Kindness is reserved for people you feel deserve your kindness, it's like respect, it's not a wholly inclusive concept. If someone is causing harm to you, in any way, why on earth should you "be kind". Am I kind to people who hurt animals, no! Am I kind to people who hurt kids, no! So why should I be kind to men who hurt women, just because for some unknown reason, their feelings and wants are deemed more important than the feelings, safety, dignity and privacy of women, in our OWN places.

Did you ask me? I didn’t get an @.

No I don’t know a % but I have known a few in my time on the gay scene. Men who occasionally wear a skirt or whatever (like Harry styles or young blud) but very much identify as male and aren’t fetishists.

My ds (who is 10) has always loved pink ‘girly’ things- he has started wearing skirts.

He knows he is a boy, and is happy as a boy, and is definitely too young for a fetish (he doesn’t even do the girlfriend or boyfriend thing at school or talk about crushes or anything yet)- he just doesn’t think that there are girl clothes and boy clothes, just clothes that he likes or doesn’t.

The obsession with gender binary in clothing, behaviour, jobs and toys etc is what has led to all this madness. People should be able to look how they like without society telling them that if the thing they like is pink they must be a girl.

Let's just stick to the facts then

He's a bloke

Why can’t people just go down the middle and say ‘their’ rather than completely misgendering?

If a man wants to be referred to as "she", then calling him "they" is equally as misgendering as calling him "he". Either, you're basically admitting you don't really believe he's a woman. If that's the case, it's more honest to say "he".

Why are people so caught up in ‘sex is determined at birth’ to just accept terminology probably needs a bit of work but being transGENDER IS a thing.

Your sex doesn't change over time. You die with the same chromosomes you were born with.

I have a lot of issues with trans women in female spaces, jobs etc. But the deliberate use on this forum to misgender is frankly disgusting. It’s a deliberate point, rather than even attempting to be ambiguous.

Attempting to be ambiguous is not a good thing. It means tiptoeing around the truth.

I asked before but do you know what percentage of people are doing this solely as a fashion choice?

Learn to lie for men or else that’s the feeling

Orwellian and dangerous

Kind is just another stick to beat women with. It's today's scolds bridle. Today's stocks in the market square. Today's ducking stool.
Ironically, being told to be kind to people who intend to cause me harm has hardened me more than anything else.

I have vowed to NEVER tell my 18-month-old daughter to 'be kind'. The whole concept of kindness has become toxic.

This incident encapsulates this new reality. I don't like it much either! But I'm trying to get my head round it.

Upthread I linked to articles about the German government in the 1980s placing foster children in the homes of known pedophiles and the impact they had on those children.

No doubt many people then nodded along with these kinds of policies because 'that's the new reality'. They presumably 'tried to get their head around it' too.

Now was that the right thing to do, do you think? Or should they have pushed back hard instead?

If there was a word that I could shoot off into space never to be seen again, it would be "kind".
My mouth actually fills with vomit when I see it used to women and kids about men.