House guests when I'm stressed

Just take yourself off somewhere quiet for the weekend where you can work. Presumably your husband will be fine with this, and doing all the organising/prep for hosting his family himself.

Then don't feel guilty at all. They don't for dumping on you, just say next time and put it out of your mind.

Are you doing PGCE op?
Or a masters?

Say no to them...

Can you do any of thr 4000 w earlier? Or is it dependant on other stuff you're learning now?

YANBU - just say no not possible this time but when my study is over would love to have you to stay. If you're direct and don't waver or be unsure it's often accepted much more readily. You're too busy so that's that - no need to feel guilty.

Tell DH he can stay with relative for a long weekend after the camping trip. He can get the washing done & camping stuff dried & sorted before he comes back with the kids.

You will then have completed & handed in your uni stuff & can enjoy the following weekend with your children rather than dealing with a mountain of washing whilst DH "disappears" to sort out the camping stuff.

Your dh should be backing you on this op. He needs to be kind to YOU first and for most.

Op you sound stressed and completely exhausted. For this reason alone your dh should have said refused the visit.

I give you express permission to say no without a shred of guilt!

Fair enough if you don't want visitors but please reconsider shutting yourself away for the entire summer and not seeing your kids at all during their school break. That doesn't seem very fair. Even if it is just a couple of days.

I'm not sure everything can go on hold because you are stressed - that's not fair on anyone....

Talk to your DH about who does what and set some time for you to enjoy yourself and for you to take yourself off somewhere to work.

Can you find yourself an air b and b or a house sit or even a hotel stay so you can get out of there and work in peace? That also means they will have to look after themselves!

Well, you cant prep food, tidy etc
So if they come you will have to say
BTW, I WONT BE COOKING,SHOPPING,TIDYING. so you will have to work it out with H,
& then go to a library, or work space

I actually think your being a bit selfish towards your husband.
He is giving you a week alone.
Your going to have to get the family shop in anyway.
Tell your husband this.
Take away on the night they arrive.
Or do baked potatoes, roast chicken and salad. Ask for help. Do not be affraid.
As you will want to see your children anyway.
They can go out to the pub for a meal on Saturday, or do a BBQ. As the men always cook that, use paper plates and cups and bin it all afterwards, send everyone else to go shop for it.
As said go to the library if you need quiet to study.

I'm sure this has been asked / answered (haven't read everything) but can you say to your DH, that's fine as long as you do all the catering?

I agree with @Cooliomayn 100%, @Twix42.

You need to say a firm NO to your dh, because your studies must come first. I would hope he doesn't insist - but if he does, could you decamp to a Premier Inn for the weekend, and work there in peace, leaving him to do all the hosting?

its just this one year. I have to get through my postgrad, that takes priority to me.

Its so sad that your DH and family aren't supporting you. Its not much to ask.

I think you need to go on the camping trip. You need a BREAK! 💔

This in spades

Coming home from camping, they’ll be arriving with a shedload of stuff to unpack and a week’s worth of washing!

Why can’t they go to the family relative’s house to ‘extend the holiday’ @Twix42 ?!

If you don't want them to come, just say no. They'll have had a whole week together so no need to prolong the holiday.

Why should op go to a hotel/her parents/air b&b? Maybe she wants to see her dc and spend some time with them after a week away without guests. There's no need for dh relly to 'extend their holiday' at your place when you're frazzled and on the point of what sounds like burnout.

It should be a no brainer. Sounds like the problem is actually the reaction you’ll get from DP. Why is he not protecting your needs?

Our family asks us all the time if they can stay with us. I don't see it as them being rude, but wanting to catch up with us which I view ( possibly the only person on Mumsnet) as being a good thing, although 2/3 nights is generally the maximum I enjoy it for.

If it's really so stressful I like the idea someone had of suggesting it happens before camping not after. Then you're not running into deadlines.

But it seems a bit unfair that the entire family have to put their life on hold for your commitment, particularly when you can just leave them to it and study elsewhere.

Your h is being a dick not to say that it’s not possible then but they can come in the autumn or other convenient time.

If your h won’t say no then he needs to do all of the work hosting and you need to priori your assignment.

I'd say Yes

BUT you stay elsewhere. So he can have the relative over as he wants but can also do all the work. He can also cover the cost of you staying at a hotel for a week so you can concentrate on your work. Bet he changes his mind then once he realises all the prepping/cooking/hosting will be on him.