To think friend should have reminded me?

You agreed to go to the gig so you owe her £200

Clearly your (former) friend was expecting you to join her - and going alone is not much fun vs going with a friend so you’ve let her down badly

‘Cant afford it’ is just an excuse- bet you’ve spent way more than £200 on non essentials in the last 6 months

That’s out of order - you should have paid regardless. Sounds like she’s had enough of the friendship and can’t say I blame her.

Your behaviour is awful.

The onus is on the one who owes the money to pay up. It is awful expecting the other person to chase payment.

I am not sure you are being serious.

She stopped talking in April because she realised you will never pay and gave up

When you told her you couldn’t make that date, did you suggest an alternative day? Did you invite her to yours at some other point?

If not, I can see why she gave up.

Your comment that "15 year friendship seems very much over" sounds as though you're aggrieved that she no longer wants a friendship with you, yet at no point have you accepted that any of this mess is down to you. You can't afford to send her £200 but seem believe that she can afford to lose that much money. I doubt she can.

So why did you agree to go in the first place? Sounds like you never intended to pay her.

You want to both keep the £200 and keep the friendship. That’s not happening.

It sounds like you would have gone to the gig had she reminded you and STILL not paid.

If this was one of my friends, or me, one of us would have sent a message a week or so before saying hey, looking forward to seeing XYZ band, what time and where shall we meet?

But we are normal people.

And besides, if she has your ticket, she’d know what seat number you were. The whole thing sounds all a bit strange.

She's not your PA, she shouldn't have to remind you. And it's embarrassing for her to have to chase you up to pay her.
Sounds like she's cut her loses here.

She shouldn’t have to chase you for money. You have shown how little you respect her. The loss of the friendship is on you, good luck to her.

Wow. Terrible behaviour. You owe this person money, pay it.

Your friend seems to have been very passive about it. It doesn’t seem normal to me with any of the arrangements I’ve had with friends to arrange something, especially something that costs so much, and then never mention it again.

Makes me wonder - Was this a sort of test? Do you have form for forgetting arrangements or for being hard to get payment from and this was just a final straw for her?

There’s no way that in the six months since you’ve never once remembered. No way.

It was your responsibility, not hers, to remember that you pay her for it. Take some accountability..

I walked away from a friendship due to this attitude so I suspect she's had similar issues with you in the past and she's done with it hence her silence.

you couldn't afford it in december, you convienently forgot till april and still now you don't have the money. why would you even think she would "send you the ticket"? hopefully all mutual friends have been warned about your inconsiderate immoral behavior.
alert OP this is a huge faux pas

Ok I take back my previous message as there is clearly back story here. Sounds like you could never afford to pay and you willfully let this gig pass you by in the hopes of never paying the 200.

I think your friend knew this is what you were doing and was giving you one last chance to get in touch before the gig... but you didn't.

You still owe her 200 and you should pay her back even if, as pp suggests, even if it's in installments. And yeah, it does sound like your friendship is over, but seems that's on you.

So she bought tickets... expecting you to pay her back when you got paid.

She would have had some idea of when that was and that date sailed past and you neither paid nor got in touch?

Did the dinner invite you declined happen before or after the date you were expected to pay?

So from her perspective, she bought tickets, you then basically ghosted her...

And instead of thinking to poke you and say 'hey did you forget' or 'hey you owe me £££' she thought she'd sit and stew and wait for you to remember?

You sound like a dick.

She also sounds like a dick.

Which one of you is the bigger dick, I'm not sure.

You need to pay her for a ticket she purchased for you because you said you'd go. That part isn't negotiable. Pay her 10 x 20 instalments if you need to. But you need to start paying it back.

That's on you.

Pay her immediately, and send her a note apologizing for making her wait so long.

This is all very weird. If I had paid for tickets for someone I'd be chasing them every week and I'd certainly contact them before the event to make arrangements (and chase payment again if not yet paid!). Very odd just to sit there but making any contact. Theoretically of course it would be nice if you didn't have to chase for payment at all, but I certainly wouldn't sit there passive while someone owed me £200!

Have you let her down a lot before?

Just from your posts it sounds like she expected you to forget to both pay and show up!

It all seems a bit odd. You don't appear to be in contact often for someone who was willing to loan you £200. It seems maybe you were once close and may have drifted apart a bit?

Some things don't add up for me and I think some of the back story is missing. I wouldn't forget about owing that money or not sticking it in a calendar. It's also odd that you both didn't discuss the gig logistics at all.

Anyway, you owe her the money. Apologise profusely and offer £50 installments if there is absolutely no way you cannot pay it all immediately or next payday. I think the friendship may be over nonetheless.

Why did you agree to go to a concert you were unable to go to? Assuming you agreed to go and asked her to get your ticket, you are SO unreasonable and paying her back should be a priority

Well, if you owe her £200, you're going to need to pay her £200. So you'll need to find it somewhere.

I'd take you to a small claims court
But maybe your ex-friend who you don't want to pay what you owe her, is a better person than me.