To think friend should have reminded me?

Before you pay ask if she sold your ticket.

Why is it on her to ask for her money back? OP is an adult.

And now friend is described as judgmental and mean. This place is so weird sometimes.

I think the OP was hoping the friend would give her the ticket anyway as it was already bought and paid for and they would go to the concert. Probably either promises to pay her back in the future. She didn't expect her to go alone

I suspect this was the final straw for the friend and you have form for this - which explains why she specifically didn’t remind you and let you dig your own grave here.

regardless, you owe her 200. If you weren’t able to pay her 200 you shouldn’t have asked her to get a ticket for you.

I get the feeling this may have been the straw that broke the camels back for your friend. Is she usually the organiser, the one who messages first, the one who pays, the one who puts the effort in? It gets pretty soul crushing being that person. Maybe she's just absolutely sick of trying. You didn't pay, she tried to organise a dinner and you didn't go. You haven't asked about the money or the event at all or tried to man's contact. I'd probably not want you to go with me by that stage either. I'd make every effort to pay the £200, even if I sent her £20 a month until it was paid off.

Ugh, there's definitely a personality type I'd classify as organised-and-extremely-judgemental isn't there. She could've taken the pragmatic approach and spent 20 seconds texting you to say "I'm wondering if you've forgotten". Her choice instead was to sit around for months fuming that you've not done "the right thing". You forgot, she's intentionally been mean, she's the one being unreasonable.

Well she may also be lying and have sold the ticket and /or gone with a friend.

She would also have a hard time legally getting the money back as she made no attempt to mitigate her loss (by contacting the op to ask for the cash or confirming she would sell it by x date if not heard anything)

So yes your behaviour is not great but neither is hers so I'd just leave it now and accept the friendship is over no matter what happens next.

I would have at least text to ask if you're going. I'd have said if not let me know so I can sell it. I wouldn't go alone or waste a ticket.

OP l don’t understand the point of your post. What exactly are you hoping to get from the thread ? You’ve drip fed information right from your first post and the tone of your replies to posters asking various questions has been ill tempered and vague. That makes me think there’s more to this than meets the eye. Do you treat your friend with the same snippy attitude you seem to have here ? If so l wouldn’t be surprised if she felt uncomfortable in reminding you, or that maybe this is the last straw if you have form for this kind of behaviour.

She’s not your mother - why would you expect her to remind you ? You let her fork out a substantial amount of money and clearly the expectation was that you would pay her back on payday. You didn’t and she’s out of pocket. So unless you contacted her before the gig confirming you were going, and with a solid offer of payment, and she’s ignored that, then you have an obligation to pay her back regardless of whether it salvages the friendship or not.

You owe her £200. You have been a cf

Exactly!

You say you can't afford to pay £200. That's your problem, not your friend's problem. Pay her in instalments if necessary

Buying 2 tickets for a gig doesn't make you "the event organiser".

It sounds like the friend was the last person to initiate contact when she invited OP to dinner. In April. So having not heard from OP in 2 months after her dinner invitation was declined, it's not really that weird that the friend is reticent to be the one to open contact again about a gig that OP hasn't even bothered to pay for. From friend's perspective, it must seem like OP has no interest.

It's weird how you didn't pay her say £20-£50 when she bought it and then the same the month after. You couldn't have forgotten 4 weeks after you had both ordered the tickets.

Also odd she didn't ask for a payment towards it or give her bank details.

My DDs friends often pay for skating / cinema and I transfer the same day.!

@Frogpole , you okay hun?

I doubt it’s Taylor Swift @MissUltraViolet as they were on sale so much earlier than that. I think we’ve had our tickets for over a year. I’m betting Killers. Less publicity, but still very expensive.

You “forgot” to pay her and “forgot” the gig as well. I think it’s time you started setting yourself done reminders and using your calendar.

and you can’t afford to send her money now either. Did you ever have any intention of paying? Or did you hope she’d “forget” too?

I hope she was able to sell your ticket (is it Taylor Swift because of it is she’ll have had no problem) and had a brilliant time.

I do think a “don’t forget my £200” text would’ve been wise from her, given your all round flakiness. Do you have previous for this?

I am less surprised about forgetting to pay than forgetting the gig - which should have been on your calendar and a clear reminder to pay every time you saw it

Especially a £200 gig

Many people feel awkward asking more than once

Sorry but most people are being quite weird on here. If I invited someone to a gig and got tickets I am the event organiser and it’s my job to message the invitee and say “looking forward to next week, shall we meet at X time or have dinner first?” Really strange and passive aggressive of this friend to just not saying anything at all and go without you! There must be more background to this, like she thinks you don’t care about her and this was some sort of quite immature test that you failed and now she’s not speaking to you.

How on earth did you forget you owed her £200? Surely pay day was within 4 weeks of her buying the tickets, is she seriously supposed to believe you forgot to pay her within that time?

I'd be angry with you if I was her. The onus was on you to contact her to pay her back and then find out the details for the concert. Not just claim to have forgotten to do all of this

You owe her £200 now and morally should pay it to her.

This.

Another classic “aibu” where the OP refuses to accept they’re the unreasonable one…

You couldn't afford the money when your friend bought the ticket and you can't afford it now.
So, what exactly did you expect your friend to send you as a reminder? "Just to remind you, you haven't paid me for the gig ticket yet, please can you send the money?". Sounds like your response would have been "oh yeah, sorry I don't have the money". Not very helpful to your friend.

You are not her friend. She is well rid of you. You sound very entitled and self-unaware

How the hell do you forget you owe a friend £200? Nah you just didn't want to pay it. Guessing she went to the concert with someone else who DID pay for the ticket

YABVVU

You couldn’t afford it then and you can’t afford it now so you should never have agreed to go, let alone agree to have her pay.

Sounds like your is fed up with your flakiness. I wouldn’t expect the friendship to survive.