UPF, poverty, obesity.... children’s healthy eating - an impossible challenge?

What makes it not real butter?

Really? I don't think that's the case at all. I see plenty of other parents managing.

People feed their kids crappie because it's easier abd they think 8ts what kids like. So few children in the UK are weaned to eat proper foods. They eat beige rubbish because parents think they wouldn't eat lentils, olives, spices

The only thing that will fix it is much much tighter regulation of the food industry and no party has the appetite for that.

The eveythibg in Moderation message serves the interests of corporations. Its a fine message when applied to say, fats or carbohydrates, which some people demonise. Not when applied to totally artificial junk foods. They are literally designed to bypass satiation cues.

Yes, portion size and plates have got a lot bigger!

As I say I still give my 12 yo her food on a IKEA plastic plate sometimes. As her portion can look ridiculous on a massive dinner plate.

I get Hello Fresh sometimes and the portions are enormous - I order for 2 and there is plenty for 3 and sometimes more.

McDonald's really knows what it's doing. When I had my firstborn I would often go into McDonald's when out to breastfeed. It was large enough to accommodate the pram easily, it has a sort of 'anonymous' feel and it felt there was no judgement and I liked the coffee.

This is one of the issues of schools having to take more and more students - more than they can properly accommodate. This is why there are no cloakrooms, no lockers and no space to sit down for lunch.

It is ridiculous, though, we can spend so much time trying to teach our DC about healthy eating and then they go to high school and it's the norm to have sausage rolls and hot dogs and chips and cakes every day for lunch!

@DoesItSparkJoyMarie Nothing to addd, I just wanted to say that I’m sorry for what you went through and, without wishing to sound trite, I hope you are as proud of yourself as you should be for getting through that awful time. Your daughter is lucky to have you. I too found myself a single mum under unexpected and hard circumstances (sudden death of my DH so different to yours but also traumatic) and without the kindness of friends and family I would have found myself in similar circumstances – and I know I wouldn’t have dealt with it even close to as well.

I was born in 80s and brought up by a single mum who was banging the anti-UPF drum back then. Home-cooked meals every night, taught me to cook and bake from being small. I was grateful that I could budget, meal plan and cook well for myself when I left home at 18 and naturally did the same for my daughter in her early years.

When we left my abusive husband, we were housed in social housing where we have to have to have PAYG energy, just as the prices rocketed. We have single glazing and live in one of the coldest parts of the UK, and for 2 winters I couldn't afford to put the heating on. I cut back on everything - no TV subscriptions, no car, furnished the whole flat off Facebook freebies. I work full time and still, after rent, bills and childcare there was no money left. So to feed and clothe her, I sold 2/3 of my wardrobe, my laptop, tablet and phone. That lasted a couple of months before we were reliant on food banks, community pantry (£3 a week for 12 items, almost all UPF) and £20 a month to play with if we were lucky. We also live in a food desert where the nearest supermarket is 45mins walk one way at adult speed.

Believe me, even with generational cooking skills and all the best will in the world, I could not source the diet I wanted for either of us. I put on 2 stone in the year this happened, through a combination of stress, depression and living on UPF. I felt awful and I knew why. We were both hungry constantly but none of the food seemed to satisfy us.

I got a new job a few months ago, with a big pay increase and flexible hours. I am extremely lucky that I had this opportunity. It means childcare costs have decreased massively, we have the budget to get a weekly Tesco delivery of real food, and I have the time to prepare it and start passing on the skills I was taught. She has fresh fruit in her lunchbox and mainlines the week's supply of blueberries and Greek yoghurt in a day. I've lost just over half the weight I put on while never feeling that disorienting dissatisfaction-hunger.

All this to say, in my experience it's been poverty - both of money and time - and the unavailability of anything but UPF, that have had the most catastrophic effects on my family and on the families I've met in similar circumstances. I'm so, so lucky things are better now but I'll never forget the shame of not being able to feed her, and not being able to feed her properly, when the shame should lie squarely at the doors of the food companies, their shareholders, and the horrorshow governments that allow it.

I think many DC eat what their parents do at home, for us it is more if we go out my DD will have a 'kids meal' of nuggets or pizza.

My 17yo has never really massively been into junk, luckily. He does drink too many fizzy drinks though but at least not this Monsters some of his friends drink!

Forbidden fruit theory is bullshit imo. The only people I ever hear spouting it are parents looking to justify their kid eating a load of junk. How many of y'all actually grew up with food Nazi parents? 😅 I did. Especially dad. Never had a fizzy drink till I was in my late teens (I'm in my twenties now so fizzy drinks were very much a thing when i was a kid) he also used to point out overweight people to us and tell us we'd end up like that if we ate junk food (mean I know and I don't condone it)

According to forbidden fruit theory I should of hit the cakes and candy hard as an adult and I should weigh 20 stone.
But nope that never happened if anything my tastesbuds prefer the type of simple stuff I had as a kid which was meat potatoes fruit vegetables milk etc.

Oh and the biggest people I know grew up eating tons of chocolate and candy. They love what they're used to

if you’re reliant on a food bank I don’t blame you for anything you cook as you clearly just cook what you are lucky enough to have

I don't think people who are reliant on food banks regard themselves as lucky.

"I don't know the exact make up of 1970's UPF but we would have a packet of angel delight between 4 of us, served with maybe a chocolate biscuit. Eaten as pudding after a home cooked meal of meat & 2 veg. We also only drank water with meals. "

Wasn't it usual to have pudding every day? A small amount like you've described but after dinner daily?

I was born early 80s. Both my parents worked full time because they had to. My mum actually did two jobs and my dad did loads of overtime on top of his normal working week. Yet we still ate mostly home cooked fresh food with the occasional takeaway or convenience food meal and we were encouraged to exercise. All this crap about how time poor parents are now because both parents have to work is simply a crap excuse. It’s been that way for many families for 40 plus years. We also didn’t have supermarket deliveries then either.

5ft5 isn't small! I'm only 5ft3 fully grown! My DD is 12 and only just 5ft!

I meant to disagree with the notion it takes a long time to cook dinner.

the food bank notion was not directed at you but was a more general ‘you’ at anyone who was reliant on them, who should not be judged for simply doing their best to ensure their kids are fed. My point really was that anyone who can afford a food shop who selects meals like pizza and chips is choosing to impact their child’s health because pasta and veg is cheaper than pizzas and chips.

I don't know the exact make up of 1970's UPF but we would have a packet of angel delight between 4 of us, served with maybe a chocolate biscuit. Eaten as pudding after a home cooked meal of meat & 2 veg. We also only drank water with meals.

Compared to now and UPF make up the majority of some people's meals, the portions are larger, they might be accompanied by fizzy drinks and added to by morning, afternoon and evening snacks.

I have gained weight due to medication so you have my sympathy. Unkindness is never helpful.

I remember when they first brought in the universal free meals for infants and lots of schools tried to make them pretty much compulsory. My argument was that may be fine if they weren't such utter crap.

I didn't think nurseries allowed cordial? It was only milk or water when mine were at nursery. Then only water at Primary.

That's very sad though your description of grey children. And I'm the first to admit we have too much UPF and are working at getting better. But just crisps or biscuits for lunch? That's heartbreaking.

I have to admit I still often use an IKEA plate for my Dd's dinner and one of the bowls for cereal and she's 12! But as you say modern plates are huge!

Blimey that is a crazy packed lunch! I must admit I've never thought to fill a lunch bag to capacity. I thought the extra space was for ice packs etc

Yes, that's true. I mean we would never eat more than 2 biscuits now either. But I know what you mean about the size of bags of crisps. I don't buy multipacks as don't want them in the house. But I will get my DC a few treats at the weekend. And yes, lots of the crisps are in massive bags.

I have to say I've never taken a snack to the school gates. My DD is at high school now and gets in at 4.15. She usually has a drink when she gets in and a snack if hungry. I don't see the need for her to have a snack before that.

Lovely, thank you. That gives me a few ideas!

I'd be interested to read the food labels (to the extent they existed) of UPFs that many of us ate in decades past.

Did the oft-cited angel delight from the 70s have the same ingredients? Did the boxed cereal I ate in the 90s in America have the same amount of crap it has now? When did they start putting palm oil in ice cream??

I can't be arsed to RTFT but DH and I (lates 30s) have had to educate our parents (all in their 60s) about upfs, to the point of getting them to read food labels with us to point out all the shit in the ice cream squash and sweets they like to give DD as a 'treat' are horrendous and not to do it.
DH and I feel pretty much in a minority of removing as many upfs as possible from DD diet. We lived abroad in two European countries and found the diets/no binge drinking a bit of an eye opener.
People need educating ref upfs. It's not that difficult to read labels but it is more expensive. This needs changing.