To not want to live in deceased MIL's house?

I would just say "yes dear" and make no attempt whatever to make it happen. I don't think you need to make a big thing of it, the idea will probably peter out in due course.

I don’t think a lot of posters are taking your DH’s grieving into account. All the “Just sell it”, and saying he’s being selfish - he’s grieving. It’s a terrible time for him. Practicality doesn’t come into it in the early days.

Cant you leave it empty while probate goes through? That could take a year of no one actually owning it. No council tax or water bill while it’s in probate. Insurance is a bit pricey but nothing compared to the costs of sale.

It would just give him a bit of time to work through the grieving process. He could go and stay there some nights if he wanted. Dont force him to sell it in the early days, he could resent you ( and it might not even be possible until probate has gone through).

Renting it out is a good option if he desperately wants to keep ownership.

Sounds like a downgrade. No drive on a busy road is a major dealbreaker. I couldn’t get parked the other day and had to make multiple trips to the car to empty various bits of furniture from a house. Painful.

Do you have dc? Huge pain trying to juggle kids/pets/shopping without a drive. Big no from me. Don’t let him twist your arm. He’s probably grieving but it isn’t sensible.

The house needs to be sold so another family can enjoy it. Once the money has come through, you can buy a bigger home to live in, especially one that doesn’t hold horrible memories. That, or he can fuck off and live on his own in mummy’s house.

Regardless of how it came about you should never be forced to live somewhere you aren’t comfortable. I agree finding somewhere together makes the most sense and honestly, no driveway would be a dealbreaker in any house for me.

Wait. Refuse to move out just yet. Look for better houses that you could have with the sale or rental of his mum's house.

Absolutely. Sell both and buy something decent.

Your DH is being ridiculous. And very selfish.

A married couple shouldn’t move in to any house they don’t both agree on. If he wants to keep it, tell him to rent it out.

You have to take the emotion out and stick to the logical and practical, ask him to do the same!

It will cost to redecorate, to move even a short distance, it will be a huge amount of tidying, packing, organisation etc.

For what benefit? If he brings up his emotional attachment, remind him this is about practicality only.

Then show him what you could get if you sold both properties and bought something bigger - more space, better garden, etc etc.

YANBU but he's just lost his mum. Now is not the time to make big decisions or get into a big argument, especially when it's your logic vs his emotions.

I would advise agreeing to leave the decision for a few months at least.

he wants to live there and will not be swayed

If one half of a couple wants a baby and the other desperately doesn't, who should get their way? Should the partner against it be forced?

What about one half of a couple suggesting you invest in xyz Company and the other is extremely opposed?

It's ALWAYS the person who doesn't want to do xyz that gets the greater vote, even if doing the thing would be the other partners' preference.

Will not be swayed my arse. Tell him he's welcome to move in alone and can sort out the sale himself when you divorce him and claim half the value of the joint asset.

This, but tread gently if the bereavement is very recent.

I agree with this.

You know him best so you need to approach it in the way that work best with him - is he a practical, list type person in other areas - list the pro's and con's of each house and of the option of cashing both in for a new house. If he's aspirational work on that aspect, that you could get something much better than either current house if you sell both.

Whatever path is best I'd not push him into a decision quickly as it's likely he'll push back just because. Let the dust settle and then let him think he's made the choice himself to sell up and buy somewhere else cos that's the best way forward for you all.

I won’t stay the night in my deceased MIL’s house (FIL still lives there), she was a very unpleasant woman. I hated going there when she was alive and less keen now she’s dead. My DH completely understands.

Madness to move !
If he has a deep sentimental attachment to it then rent it out.

Absolutely wouldn't budge on it, especially as there's no driveway. I was thinking there must be some upside if your husband wants to move but you'd probably end up even more out of pocket having to redecorate. Did he have an amazing childhood?

Definitely don’t give in.

If she hadn’t have been horrible to you do you think you would think differently?

His mum has died, I would be tempted to comprise by trying it for a year, let him see that it’s not big enough and that parking on the street is rubbish and then move.

I can totally understand that your husband wants to move back to his childhood home, you are very fortunate to have inherited it. Whilst I appreciate that you don't have happy memories of your time there with MIL, you are in a position to redecorate/reconfigure to make it your own.
Consider how you would feel if you inherited your parents' home and your husband wanted to sell it

No way would I move into a house with such toxicity attached to it.
Is your husband a bit of a bully?
Sounds like it.
Do not move, certainly do not give up a driveway for a busy road.

I would remind DH of the adage that you should wait a year from bereavement before making major life decisions.

Could you rent it out in the meantime?

YANBU and I would not be bullied into moving in.

It makes no sense to move into her house unless it's a mansion which it's clearly not. It's weird to want to move back into your childhood home I think.

YANBU, but need to just gently say it’s too soon to make such a decision.

Yanbu. I can empathise with all your reasons for not moving in to their house. Search for your own and love it 😊

If it was a nicer, bigger etc house I would say YABU .. but if you don’t gain anything and could get a larger house with the proceeds I don’t see why you would live in it