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Cat Deeley making fun of epilepsy

159 replies

Weemammy21 · 18/06/2024 18:58

AIBU in thinking that any tv presenter who ridicules people with serious health conditions should not be in post? This is what I think about Cat Deeley ridiculing people with epilepsy during This morning yesterday. People like this should not be tv presenters because of their intolerance and making fun of children and adults with epilepsy. AIBU?

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WhatAFaffyFiasco · 24/06/2024 13:56

Waffle78 · 21/06/2024 16:15

My daughter has difficult to control epilepsy. She is on 4 lots of meds twice a day as well as rescue meds. She has had multiple hospital admissions pumped full of drugs fighting for her life.

She has had multiple injuries broken bones lost teeth etc always has bruises. There are days she can't leave the house because of the number of drop seizures she's having.

I know 2 of her piers she was at school with have died of nocturnal epilepsy. She rarely has the nocturnal ones now. But she did used to have a lot of them so has a video monitor in her room.

Epilepsy it isn't something to joke about. No I'm not a snowflake I have a sense of humour. But some things you just don't joke about.

Agreed. There was a a film with this kind of joke in the script, something like "don't have a seizure over it," instead of "chill out." it seems to be becoming normalised to joke about seizures now. There was even a social media trend recently where teenagers were pretending to have seizures, then all laughing about it which was imo disgusting.
I don't agree with this kind of joke, and there are many other ways of having "fun."

I do however think Cat Deeley made a mistake, should have thought before she spoke being a public figure, but apologised and it is over with. She seems like a nice person, there was no ill intent, just a thoughtless slip of the tongue.

Ksqordssvimy · 23/06/2024 16:05

@ClaustrophobicKipper considering all you've endured, and it sounds a lot, you should have more of an insight into people's opinions. It wasn't so long ago your children's conditions would've been the subject of casual name calling - kids at my school with SEN were laughed at. Progress ought to be celebrated, not dismissed. I would never belittle you like you've me and other seizure sufferers and if someone mocked you or your children's conditions I would find it reprehensible. We aren't going to agree, so let's leave it.

Ksqordssvimy · 23/06/2024 16:05

@ClaustrophobicKipper considering all you've endured, and it sounds a lot, you should have more of an insight into people's opinions. It wasn't so long ago your children's conditions would've been the subject of casual name calling - kids at my school with SEN needs were laughed at. Progress ought to be celebrated, not dismissed. I would never belittle you like you've me and other seizure sufferers and if someone mocked your or your children's conditions I would find it reprehensible. We aren't going to agree, so let's leave it.

ClaustrophobicKipper · 23/06/2024 10:19

Ksqordssvimy · 21/06/2024 19:01

You make a great point @ClaustrophobicKipper except it's really hard to get on with life when you're critically ill and housebound or caring for your child with seizures that run on through the night and leave you frantic with worry in A&E. I honestly don't know why so many people WITHOUT uncontrolled epilepsy are intent on belittling the experience of people with it. It's really, really shit and you wouldn't do it to cancer sufferers or people with autism (at least I hope not), so just stop. It's not about being 'snowflakes' or any other ridiculous term. It's about having a serious illness and disliking it being trivialised because you're in the thankful position not to have it. All it suggests to me is - from your part - an enormous amount of black and white thinking, an inability to understand nuance and total lack of empathy.

It's just exhausting

Edited

I do understand. I'm not skipping through life happily and being naive. I have multiple sclerosis, and am a single parent to a child with complex additional needs. This is my life. When I say getting on with life I don't mean flying through a career or holidaying or whatever else "getting on with life" conjures up.

This is our life. Getting by day to day and caring for our children to the best of our ability.

Trying to police other people's words it actions or thoughts will never bring happiness

Ksqordssvimy · 21/06/2024 19:01

You make a great point @ClaustrophobicKipper except it's really hard to get on with life when you're critically ill and housebound or caring for your child with seizures that run on through the night and leave you frantic with worry in A&E. I honestly don't know why so many people WITHOUT uncontrolled epilepsy are intent on belittling the experience of people with it. It's really, really shit and you wouldn't do it to cancer sufferers or people with autism (at least I hope not), so just stop. It's not about being 'snowflakes' or any other ridiculous term. It's about having a serious illness and disliking it being trivialised because you're in the thankful position not to have it. All it suggests to me is - from your part - an enormous amount of black and white thinking, an inability to understand nuance and total lack of empathy.

It's just exhausting

ClaustrophobicKipper · 21/06/2024 17:14

I can't help but feel like everything is offensive to someone, somewhere.

I still hear the phrase "nearly gave me a heart attack" or "they're acting crazy". Heart attacks kill lots of people, and mental illness is horrific to sufferers. But we can't police other people's language, we need to get on with life instead of sitting about looking for something to moan about or be offended about. To be honest if you have time to be offended by things you hear or what people say you are in a privileged situation! It's a sign of luxurious times. But trying to control other people is bit the right answer. You need to work on yourself and explore why certain things upset you and work in yourself.

It's just exhausting.

Waffle78 · 21/06/2024 16:15

ClaustrophobicKipper · 18/06/2024 19:02

She was dancing and said her dancing made her look like she was "having a seizure"

I personally dont see the harm, and i miss the days where you could joke and be silly freely

My daughter has difficult to control epilepsy. She is on 4 lots of meds twice a day as well as rescue meds. She has had multiple hospital admissions pumped full of drugs fighting for her life.

She has had multiple injuries broken bones lost teeth etc always has bruises. There are days she can't leave the house because of the number of drop seizures she's having.

I know 2 of her piers she was at school with have died of nocturnal epilepsy. She rarely has the nocturnal ones now. But she did used to have a lot of them so has a video monitor in her room.

Epilepsy it isn't something to joke about. No I'm not a snowflake I have a sense of humour. But some things you just don't joke about.

Ksqordssvimy · 20/06/2024 17:52

I think people with uncontrollable epilepsy (not working, banned from driving, waking in resus, breaking bones, brain surgery) are just desperately grasping for some acknowledgement but it's not happening so let's leave it. To the few who get it - we get it.

PeriMenoMayhem · 20/06/2024 13:02

Verv · 20/06/2024 12:30

She compared her dancing to a seizure.
Thats self deprecation, not ridiculing epilepsy.

You can also have a seizure if you get an electric shock, or use drugs, or get a bite, etc etc.

I have friends whose dc or family members have had seizures due to things such as flashing lights, hypoglycaemia, and a fainting disorder none of them have a diagnosis of epilepsy my dc does but we know a lot of people with seizure disorders that aren’t epileptic

Verv · 20/06/2024 12:30

She compared her dancing to a seizure.
Thats self deprecation, not ridiculing epilepsy.

You can also have a seizure if you get an electric shock, or use drugs, or get a bite, etc etc.

Weemammy21 · 20/06/2024 12:23

@Serencwtch I am not offended on your behalf or anyone else. My opinion is based on my being a person who has uncontrollable epilepsy. I am offended that Cat Deeley made fun of the seizures that I live with daily and which my children and family deal with. Live tv presenters normalising that it is ok to ridicule persons with seizures, epilepsy or other disabilities is NOT ok and should not be condoned and neither should the half hearted so called apology she made. Live tv presenters have a duty of care that she abused with her derogatory comments about people with seizures. It’s not funny and nor should anyone be making excuses for her.

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EvangelicalAboutButteredToast · 19/06/2024 19:24

LordSnot · 19/06/2024 18:32

So "the internet" isn't outraged and demanding punishment then. Just certain hard of thinking people.

That’s what you are calling them.

BreatheAndFocus · 19/06/2024 18:33

Youdontevengohere · 19/06/2024 17:49

I have a family member who suffers from non epileptic seizures, which is why I wouldn’t assume it’s epilepsy.

I believe Epilepsy Action also provide information about non-epileptic seizures so if they were on the show they’d be able to provide a suitable education around seizures. The majority of seizures are caused by epilepsy and most people would name that as the top cause. I hope your relative is getting the support they need and is well.

Serencwtch · 19/06/2024 18:32

Poor choice of words & she apologized. Not sure why you need to be so goady
I have epilepsy & more offended by posts like yours then by the comment that she quickly apologized for. It's kind of you to be offended on my behalf but I think you need to get over it.

LordSnot · 19/06/2024 18:32

EvangelicalAboutButteredToast · 19/06/2024 16:14

Forgiveness from the offended is not on offer. The people in this thread failed to be outraged originally.

So "the internet" isn't outraged and demanding punishment then. Just certain hard of thinking people.

Rav3 · 19/06/2024 18:28

Weemammy21 · 19/06/2024 18:19

This post wasn’t created to be goady at all no matter what is claimed here. This post was created to ask AIBU for thinking that tv presenters who often have a huge following of people should really still present live tv shows when they are ridiculing people who suffer from seizures. I personally do t think Cat Deeley should continue representing live tv shows because of her recent ridiculing people who have seizures. People who suffer from seizures, epilepsy or any disability have enough to live with without television presenters normalising that it is ok to ridicule those with a disability. It’s not and you suggest otherwise is wrong

Yes, you are being unfair.

And yes, it is ok (though not always kind) to ridicule anyone, or any thing. She has already apologised I believe in case anyone took offence, issue resolved for most people.

Weemammy21 · 19/06/2024 18:19

This post wasn’t created to be goady at all no matter what is claimed here. This post was created to ask AIBU for thinking that tv presenters who often have a huge following of people should really still present live tv shows when they are ridiculing people who suffer from seizures. I personally do t think Cat Deeley should continue representing live tv shows because of her recent ridiculing people who have seizures. People who suffer from seizures, epilepsy or any disability have enough to live with without television presenters normalising that it is ok to ridicule those with a disability. It’s not and you suggest otherwise is wrong

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BeetlejuiceBeetlejuiceBeetlejuice · 19/06/2024 18:17

Ksqordssvimy · 19/06/2024 18:12

Absolutely agree @BeetlejuiceBeetlejuiceBeetlejuice. I think if this incident shows anything it's that among the wider public, who aren't engulfed in the 'seizure bubble", there is very little understanding of it. But 30% of people with epilepsy don't gain control, 1/1000 people with epilepsy die from it, people are left seriously ill and housebound from epilepsy, 1/26 people will have a seizure at some point and there are many different types of seizures other than tonic clonics and injuries from seizures include broken bones, burns and head injuries. I speak from an epileptic perspective, of course, but as someone rightly pointed out there are many different causes of seizures. Careless words can cut deep, even if unintentional.

Completely. And just speaking about epilepsy, it is surprisingly common for something that so many people are so misinformed about.

If I had a pound for every time someone has told me ‘but you don’t LOOK disabled’ I’d be a rich woman.

Ksqordssvimy · 19/06/2024 18:12

BeetlejuiceBeetlejuiceBeetlejuice · 19/06/2024 18:00

I have epilepsy. I don’t think she had malicious intention and she recognised the responsibility of her position and apologised. As an individual, she messed up and should be forgiven.

However, this opens up a fantastic platform to get people on the show who have seizures and to explore the nature of stigma. People who have seizures (epileptic or not) are mocked and frequently feared. This would be a great opportunity to do some work to undoing that.

Absolutely agree @BeetlejuiceBeetlejuiceBeetlejuice. I think if this incident shows anything it's that among the wider public, who aren't engulfed in the 'seizure bubble", there is very little understanding of it. But 30% of people with epilepsy don't gain control, 1/1000 people with epilepsy die from it, people are left seriously ill and housebound from epilepsy, 1/26 people will have a seizure at some point and there are many different types of seizures other than tonic clonics and injuries from seizures include broken bones, burns and head injuries. I speak from an epileptic perspective, of course, but as someone rightly pointed out there are many different causes of seizures. Careless words can cut deep, even if unintentional.

Ksqordssvimy · 19/06/2024 18:03

Youdontevengohere · 19/06/2024 17:49

I have a family member who suffers from non epileptic seizures, which is why I wouldn’t assume it’s epilepsy.

This is a very valid point. I'm sorry for your relative, I understand this to be a very difficult illness of which there's also little understanding

BeetlejuiceBeetlejuiceBeetlejuice · 19/06/2024 18:00

I have epilepsy. I don’t think she had malicious intention and she recognised the responsibility of her position and apologised. As an individual, she messed up and should be forgiven.

However, this opens up a fantastic platform to get people on the show who have seizures and to explore the nature of stigma. People who have seizures (epileptic or not) are mocked and frequently feared. This would be a great opportunity to do some work to undoing that.

Youdontevengohere · 19/06/2024 17:49

BreatheAndFocus · 19/06/2024 17:37

It sounds like some education about epilepsy would be a good thing, as I suggested earlier in the thread. The majority of people I know would make an association between the two and none of them are doctors, but it seems there needs to be more awareness.

Edited

I have a family member who suffers from non epileptic seizures, which is why I wouldn’t assume it’s epilepsy.

BreatheAndFocus · 19/06/2024 17:37

Youdontevengohere · 19/06/2024 16:58

My first thought if someone told me that they had seizures would be that they had seizures. Not being a Dr, I wouldn’t be able to attribute them to a particular medical condition.

It sounds like some education about epilepsy would be a good thing, as I suggested earlier in the thread. The majority of people I know would make an association between the two and none of them are doctors, but it seems there needs to be more awareness.

Miri13 · 19/06/2024 17:00

Seriously. Chill out and stop being so offended 🙄🙄

Youdontevengohere · 19/06/2024 16:58

BreatheAndFocus · 19/06/2024 16:43

No, they’re not but if someone told you they had seizures, I’m pretty sure the first thought in people’s heads’ would be epilepsy. Likewise, chemotherapy has other uses apart from treating cancer, but I’m confident the first thing that would enter people’s head if they heard the word would be cancer.

My first thought if someone told me that they had seizures would be that they had seizures. Not being a Dr, I wouldn’t be able to attribute them to a particular medical condition.