Been with partner 5 years. We have 1 toddler and 1 baby on the way.
2 years into our relationship and his travel related business fell flat on its face. He ended up owing lots of money and getting deeper and deeper into a rut. He still owes people money- friends, family, work related funds.
He owes me around £10k for me covering his rent numerous times (we've always kept finances separate anyway)
He's a very closed book and won't open up to me if I try to ask/ help. He just shuts it down. Has also lied about finance related things in the past.
I have been feeling like he is getting slowly back on his feet. Work starting to come back in etc etc.
But today I received a message from a work connection of his stating he needs to pay back the 6k owed or legal action will be taken.
I've also read over his shoulder other people asking for money. I dread to think how much he actually owes.
These amounts are ALOT to us. We are not rich people. The 10k he owes me was my life's savings. He has started to pay that back now (only one instalment so far) but it's sporadic and not reliable.
I messaged him to say we need to talk about the situation with this work contact and he said "no we don't because that is business not personal" ... I said "it is personal when I'm being contacted"
I feel so anxious and sick. I know he won't talk to me and I feel like my world is closing in on me right now.
What do you do when you have a partner in serious debt that won't talk about it ?!
Advice please.