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Original poster

Surprise day trip - sister mad!

477 replies

Bellyblueboy · 17/06/2024 23:52

I will open this by saying I don’t have kids!

it’s my sister’s birthday today. As her present I have booked a day trip to London for us (we are in Dublin). I knew she wouldn’t want an overnight because of her dog.

I have booked flights and a few things for us to do. I have arranged someone to come and walk the dog (our brother).

she is angry because it’s a long day - first and last flights and she says it will be too much for the kids.

we would need to leave the house at about 6:30am and our flight gets back at about 9pm.

I thought in the summer holidays this would be grand - but clearly not🫣.

I have apologised - the flights are non refundable. She and I can’t go without the kids as her husband is away on a work trip and no grandparents are free.

So my question - do you think she will come around? Do I go alone? I honestly thought I was doing a nice thing but she says I am clueless and don’t understand children. The kids are 12 and 16. The 16 year old does love a lie in and on non-school days is rarely up before noon! But he has got up early before for holidays.

OP posts:
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DodoTired · 24/06/2024 08:48

mydogisthebest · 22/06/2024 16:34

As OP says, getting through London City and Dublin is quick and easy. They live not far from Dublin airport and London City is so close to the centre of London. Hardly any travelling to/from airports and should speed through security.

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I used London City, thanks. It is fast but this still stands, it isn’t Eurostar

JJtrying2024 · 23/06/2024 21:25

I'm sorry, this is not a representation of Irish men. I don't know who you know, but seriously not true.
In fact, I think our country is ahead of the curve at treating women equally. And I've heard this from alot of foreign people that live here. Men respect their partner's or wives and treat them equal. Your sister obv choose badly

mydogisthebest · 23/06/2024 15:42

Chocolateorange22 · 23/06/2024 15:34

Woe is me I've forgotten to click on the last page. No need to be a rude arse about it....

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No need either to be ignorant and not read ALL the OP's post. Makes very frustrating reading for those of us who do bother

Chocolateorange22 · 23/06/2024 15:34

Liliee · 23/06/2024 08:22

Would it occur to you to scan OP's updates?

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Woe is me I've forgotten to click on the last page. No need to be a rude arse about it....

Solibear · 23/06/2024 14:00

When I was reading this I was all for YABU as I thought the kids must be babies/small children, as if they don’t get enough sleep at the right times their world implodes, as does that of everyone else around them! For this to be about a 16 and 12 year old though?? Either she babies them, or there’s something else going on here

Edit: never mind, I just saw all of your updates!

Lola2321 · 23/06/2024 10:07

I’ve just caught up! So glad you’re all going! Funny that the gang on mums net were all saying it’s too much for kids and you were being unreasonable when all along it was as your sister was planning a two week hol with you. I love this - shows what a special bond you both have.

BeachParty · 23/06/2024 09:31

FawnFrenchieMum · 23/06/2024 08:44

Have a look at the Facebook group Extreme Day Trips, people fly all over for one day trips! This is mild compared to most of them.

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Yes, I live vicariously through that group 😁

FawnFrenchieMum · 23/06/2024 08:44

DodoTired · 22/06/2024 14:23

Sorry that’s a bit of insane plan - it would work with Eurostar but with a plane! You’ll spend half the time on the way to/from airport and in security. Ive done a day trip to Paris but wouldn’t enjoy this idea, with or without kids

Have a look at the Facebook group Extreme Day Trips, people fly all over for one day trips! This is mild compared to most of them.

Liliee · 23/06/2024 08:22

Chocolateorange22 · 23/06/2024 08:19

I think you've tried to be spontaneous and sad that it's come to this. If she is stalling would the kids want to just go with you? Your sisters birthday treat can then be to have the whole day to herself to do what she likes? Saves wasting it all then.

Would it occur to you to scan OP's updates?

Chocolateorange22 · 23/06/2024 08:19

I think you've tried to be spontaneous and sad that it's come to this. If she is stalling would the kids want to just go with you? Your sisters birthday treat can then be to have the whole day to herself to do what she likes? Saves wasting it all then.

Lola2321 · 23/06/2024 07:55

i thought you were going to say the kids are under 5!! In which case I’d have agreed it’s too much for the kids - however at their age it sounds like a fab day out!

YANBTA!!

BlondeAussie · 23/06/2024 04:10

Why is the plan all so rushed "because of her dog"? It seems logical to include a dog-sitter overnight (perhaps the brother who is already lined up to walk the dog), then you travellers can take the pressure off and stay overnight, and actually have a better chance to relax and enjoy your break.

Codlingmoths · 23/06/2024 02:25

HoarseSoprano · 23/06/2024 01:10

There is no ‘Irish attitude’, any more than (one hopes), the hapless, strategically-incompetent, chronically-unfaithful, or malicious fuckwits so often described on the Mn relationships board are an accurate representation of British masculinity.

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I’m on board with that! But the op thinks there is, and my post is to her.

SleepPrettyDarling · 23/06/2024 02:23

I love your can-do attitude, and I think you will open your sister’s (and BIL’s) eyes. Out of Dublin, I took the kids to Thomas Land for a day trip, into Birmingham. Saved a fortune by not staying over. It was a Grand Day Out. Everyone was tired the next day, and it turned out that TL is a bit shit in the rain, especially if you arrive before the park even opens (thanks, Red-eye scheduling) but it was a super and memorable day trip.

HoarseSoprano · 23/06/2024 01:10

Codlingmoths · 23/06/2024 01:06

You should encourage her to book at least a week holiday, but ideally two weeks and in term time. Careful that you haven’t absorbed some of this Irish attitude you mention- he will cope fine and there is no reason she shouldn’t do it, so why do you assume she won’t follow through? make sure you say something to your parents too, about the sun doesn’t shine out of a man because he knows his kids names and actually he’s a bit of an arse and their daughter has had a rough deal for a long time.

There is no ‘Irish attitude’, any more than (one hopes), the hapless, strategically-incompetent, chronically-unfaithful, or malicious fuckwits so often described on the Mn relationships board are an accurate representation of British masculinity.

Codlingmoths · 23/06/2024 01:06

You should encourage her to book at least a week holiday, but ideally two weeks and in term time. Careful that you haven’t absorbed some of this Irish attitude you mention- he will cope fine and there is no reason she shouldn’t do it, so why do you assume she won’t follow through? make sure you say something to your parents too, about the sun doesn’t shine out of a man because he knows his kids names and actually he’s a bit of an arse and their daughter has had a rough deal for a long time.

Itisjustmyopinion · 23/06/2024 00:58

Milliemoo6 · 22/06/2024 19:22

That makes me exhausted just reading it. Do people really visit another country for a day?! You're heart is definitely in the right place and it's a lovely gesture, just a bit left of the mark.

Of course they do. I have just booked a day trip to Barcelona after being inspired by a comment on this thread

HoarseSoprano · 23/06/2024 00:54

Bellyblueboy · 23/06/2024 00:11

I think she has just realised my BIL is a bit of an arse. He live his life, does what he pleases and she does everything for the kids while working full time.

Ireland is a challenging place to be woman. My parents think he is amazing because he occasionally spends time with the kids.

I don’t want to start the whole female hormones stuff. She is awesome- works full time and pretty ouch raises two kids on her own while he travels the world and doesn’t even ask if everything at home is hand.

it’s a day trip. I thought it would be nice. The kids both know now and are supper excited. I have sod I can take them and she can have a day alone but she wants to come.

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Your BIL is a wanker, but I fail to see what this has to do with Ireland. The Mn bad husbands he resembles are overwhelmingly British.

Original poster
Bellyblueboy · 23/06/2024 00:41

Meraas · 23/06/2024 00:12

Oh wow that’s given me the rage. I hope she divorces him.

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he has been part of my family for 30 years and I di love him. But I also see my sisters sacrifices while his life is not impacted at all by having children.

I am very conscious that I am the single career driven heartless spirit buster aunt😂. But I do try and bring fun where I can. And to be honest my sister normally appreciates sudden holidays. We took the kids to euro Disney - my Christmas o present many years ago. The kids loved it - I hated every minute😂. But tejn years later my nephew still remembers it. His dad was working.

OP posts:
Meraas · 23/06/2024 00:12

Bellyblueboy · 23/06/2024 00:11

I think she has just realised my BIL is a bit of an arse. He live his life, does what he pleases and she does everything for the kids while working full time.

Ireland is a challenging place to be woman. My parents think he is amazing because he occasionally spends time with the kids.

I don’t want to start the whole female hormones stuff. She is awesome- works full time and pretty ouch raises two kids on her own while he travels the world and doesn’t even ask if everything at home is hand.

it’s a day trip. I thought it would be nice. The kids both know now and are supper excited. I have sod I can take them and she can have a day alone but she wants to come.

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Oh wow that’s given me the rage. I hope she divorces him.

Original poster
Bellyblueboy · 23/06/2024 00:11

Itislate · 22/06/2024 22:06

I hope you all have a great time. Has your sister considered she might be perimenopausal?

I think she has just realised my BIL is a bit of an arse. He live his life, does what he pleases and she does everything for the kids while working full time.

Ireland is a challenging place to be woman. My parents think he is amazing because he occasionally spends time with the kids.

I don’t want to start the whole female hormones stuff. She is awesome- works full time and pretty ouch raises two kids on her own while he travels the world and doesn’t even ask if everything at home is hand.

it’s a day trip. I thought it would be nice. The kids both know now and are supper excited. I have sod I can take them and she can have a day alone but she wants to come.

OP posts:
Liliee · 22/06/2024 23:40

Itislate · 22/06/2024 22:06

I hope you all have a great time. Has your sister considered she might be perimenopausal?

It's her DH who can't be arsed doing anything and leaves everything to her. May be he's peri? At least that would give him an excuse for being an arse.

Justanothermum42 · 22/06/2024 22:51

?! As a mother of a 13 and a 15 year olds- they will be fine!!!! The kids will love it and wouldn’t care that it is a long day. I think it’s your sister who has the problem. Sorry 😞

Itislate · 22/06/2024 22:06

I hope you all have a great time. Has your sister considered she might be perimenopausal?

Original poster
Bellyblueboy · 22/06/2024 20:37

the kids will just sleep the next day and watch tv. We can get takeout to save cooking. At their age they don’t need much childcare. Had my parents been in the country they would have gone round to help with two teenagers who will be in bed.

OP posts: