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Dm took all the food for my kids!

637 replies

Littlechesnuttree · 17/06/2024 17:17

Newly single mum here hi!

dm visited this weekend to ‘help’ largely consisted of me running errands for her and bringing cups of tea.

here’s the thing, she brought her dog who she only feeds meat (she won’t listen) so steak, chicken, mince etc.

i went to the butcher on the weekend and bought our meat for the month, steaks, whole chickens, lamb leg, chicken breast, meat and even duck breast.

all in all £80 or more likely. Had them in fridge before I could sort and put in freezer.

i had a kids bday party so was getting kids ready whilst dm was packing up.

go to the fridge this morning and it’s all gone… all the meat.

she thought I bought it for her dog. So now not only got to do a freezer tea for the kids but ive got to rebuy it all.

dm didn’t offer to replace and lives too far away to return.

aibu to think this is barmy behaviour? You check before you clean out someone’s fridge

OP posts:
QualityDog · 17/06/2024 17:57

Next time!

Your children will be dead from starvation before 'next time'.

OldPine · 17/06/2024 17:55

Ok. But you've asked her to transfer the money to you, right?

DelphiniumBlue · 17/06/2024 17:55

I’d ask her to order replacements online and have it delivered to your address. Plus money for a takeaway to be delivered for dinner tonight and until the delivery arrives.
Failing that, she transfers money to cover all of that to you pronto.

WinterMorn · 17/06/2024 17:49

Whiskeywithoutice · 17/06/2024 17:46

@WinterMorn In case it helps the OP said:

Littlechesnuttree · Today 17:33
I’ve said that’s the kids dinners for the month gone and tonight and she said I’d have to get more and she was sorry, I said I can’t afford it and she said she’ll take me to the butchers next time She visits next month

its the money and the time too,

Now are you quite happy and satisfied? Not feeling aggressive or whiny or entitled?

Not when I have to read posts like yours, no.

ohfourfoxache · 17/06/2024 17:49

I’d be cancelling all future visits immediately IIWY

LordSnot · 17/06/2024 17:48

Littlechesnuttree · 17/06/2024 17:46

I called her and asked where everything went she said for the dog, and she’s too far away for return it and I’d just have to ‘pop to the shops’ and buy more which I pointed out I’m alone, and at an office, I can’t. They have nothing for the week and I don’t want to spend another £100 or so. She said she’d buy the next load of meat from the butcher when she’s up next 3/4 weeks time. I said come on mum, what do I do in the mean time and then she had breakdown about how she’s got so much to deal with but took time out to help me… all whilst I was at work so I don’t really have the time or bandwidth for the conversation

Text her your bank details and say you need it in your account today to feed her grandchildren.

Comedycook · 17/06/2024 17:48

Omg...that's outrageous!

Procrastinates · 17/06/2024 17:47

and then she had breakdown about how she’s got so much to deal with but took time out to help me…

So she's a theif and a manipulative... She sounds delightful. What did she say when you told her to transfer the money across. Seriously don't engage in her nonsense tell her she needs to transfer the money now.

TheCheeseThief · 17/06/2024 17:47

Tell her to send you the money by the end of today, she can't leave her grandchildren hungry!

Has she got dementia?

WinterMorn · 17/06/2024 17:47

ActualChips · 17/06/2024 17:45

@WinterMorn you can select 'view all' to read all of the OPs replies on threads.

Thank you, I have…but until the latest OP post it wasn’t clear.

Easipeelerie · 17/06/2024 17:47

She’s absolutely not going to return it. Her behaviour is disgraceful. Get rid.

Whiskeywithoutice · 17/06/2024 17:46

@WinterMorn In case it helps the OP said:

Littlechesnuttree · Today 17:33
I’ve said that’s the kids dinners for the month gone and tonight and she said I’d have to get more and she was sorry, I said I can’t afford it and she said she’ll take me to the butchers next time She visits next month

its the money and the time too,

Now are you quite happy and satisfied? Not feeling aggressive or whiny or entitled?

Littlechesnuttree · 17/06/2024 17:46

WinterMorn · 17/06/2024 17:42

Taken on board 🙂 but I honestly can’t see where this has been answered.

I called her and asked where everything went she said for the dog, and she’s too far away for return it and I’d just have to ‘pop to the shops’ and buy more which I pointed out I’m alone, and at an office, I can’t. They have nothing for the week and I don’t want to spend another £100 or so. She said she’d buy the next load of meat from the butcher when she’s up next 3/4 weeks time. I said come on mum, what do I do in the mean time and then she had breakdown about how she’s got so much to deal with but took time out to help me… all whilst I was at work so I don’t really have the time or bandwidth for the conversation

OP posts:
Easipeelerie · 17/06/2024 17:46

I would tell her you can’t wait, the children have no food, you have no money and you need it now.
If she prevaricates, and she will do, cut contact. Why would you entertain a thief in the house?

ActualChips · 17/06/2024 17:45

@WinterMorn you can select 'view all' to read all of the OPs replies on threads.

GalacticalFarce · 17/06/2024 17:45

How on Earth did she think £80 of meat was for her to take home for her dog?
This makes no sense. She's either lying and just took the contents of your freezer or she's got some mental health issues.

She needs to transfer you the money.

WinterMorn · 17/06/2024 17:42

fiddlesticksohyeah · 17/06/2024 17:39

Simmer down, Delia

Taken on board 🙂 but I honestly can’t see where this has been answered.

Namechangedagain20 · 17/06/2024 17:42

Rather than say you can’t afford it just outright tell her she needs to transfer you x amount today so that you can replace the meat for your children’s meals.

Whiskeywithoutice · 17/06/2024 17:41

No way would she be fobbing me off for buying food for my children in a month's time when she has waltzed off with it. She should have asked but there is no way anybody with even a shred of common sense thinks that £80 or more of meat is for her dog.

She would be paying me right now or there wouldn't be any more visits. Her dog is eating better than her grandchildren who are going hungry. She is a thief and I would be thinking very seriously if I want somebody setting that sort of example for my children.

I just can't imagine anybody doing this or not making amends immediately. My mother's dog led a very pampered life but there is no way my mother would have cleaned out my fridge of family food for him.

WinterMorn · 17/06/2024 17:40

Littlechesnuttree · 17/06/2024 17:38

I have answered the question, why are you so aggressive

It’s not aggressive at all, but I don’t understand why you don’t just ask for the cash? I must have missed it if you have done, in which case you have my apologies. It’s just that this post has people asking you this question repeatedly and you don’t seem to have answered it 🤷‍♀️

TomeTome · 17/06/2024 17:40

She can send you the money but better still she could have replacement meat delivered. What a cow.

fiddlesticksohyeah · 17/06/2024 17:39

WinterMorn · 17/06/2024 17:35

So…..have you asked her for the money or not? Why won’t you answer this question?

Simmer down, Delia

pandarific · 17/06/2024 17:38

*'Mum, that was my kids meals for the month. Only the steaks labeled for the dog were meant for you. You know I am on my own now and cannot afford to spend another £80 to feed your grandkids, while your dog eats like a king. Please could you transfer me the money, so they don't go without.'$

This, text her this!

Littlechesnuttree · 17/06/2024 17:38

WinterMorn · 17/06/2024 17:35

So…..have you asked her for the money or not? Why won’t you answer this question?

I have answered the question, why are you so aggressive

OP posts:
Bettyfromlondon · 17/06/2024 17:38

There is no way I would let her visit again!! That behaviour would kill my goodwill stone dead!