Dm took all the food for my kids!

Why on earth would she think that you bought that amount of prime meat cuts, including steak and a whole leg of lamb for her dog? It makes no sense.

Most of the people I know who raw feed their dogs don't do it using prime cuts and whole joints like that.

What an odd thread.

If you've outright asked her and she's outright refused, go NC till she does. That's absolutely horrendous behaviour from a mother/grandmother.

I actually can't imagine the devastation of that OP. Better things are coming, he clearly didn't deserve you anyway. What an utter waster. You will recover from this and come out even stronger on the other side. No one will be able to devastate you like this again. Quite frankly though your mother isn't helping you. Its very clear that you are the one caring for her, which is the last thing you need right now.

This is a perfect recommendation. I'm so sorry for the stress you're under, but if she's comfortable emotionally blackmailing you, I'd give it back to her. If she's worried about appearances, maybe even mention that everyone is shocked that she'd take her child/grandchildrens' food without word for her DOG. Blow off some steam by outgassing her, you know that it's all an act for her, but most of all, best of luck with everything (and worst of luck to the husband!)

She's a silly cow considering she's got the money, OP.
Also, that was a very expensive babysitter. She's definitely not thinking of your welfare is she? Christ, what a mess.

Wow!

That is unbelievable!!

Your mom is so awful that it gave me an instant headache.

Crikey, your mum’s a total cow (sorry!). I’d send a very unemotional message eg ‘As you know, that meat bar the two steaks labelled ‘for dog’ were for the children. I need you to transfer me the money/do an online shop for me, I can’t wait til you come next month’. If she plays funny buggers, then you can pull the emotional strings ‘Can’t believe you took the children’s food. If you’re refusing to replace it today, I don’t think I want you coming next month.’ No shits given here, I’m utterly appalled at her horrible behaviour. She should have done an online order as soon as you told her. This fake panic attack/suicide threats must be incredibly tiring.

Hi OP, I just wanted to take a minute to tell you your doing really well. I'm pretty sure with a break up 2 weeks ago your pretty devastated about that. Yet your still at work, still being a mum and still having to be a parent to your own parent. Keep on hanging on things will get easier. Sorry about your mother, must be a nightmare

Well I hope you tell her never to darken your doorstep again OP. She's a thief and a liar and a shit parent and grandparent. I'd tell her so as well. She's not going to kill herself, she's a manipulative arsehole. Unless you put a stop to this shit this is your life with her. She will continue the gaslighting and manipulation -it's a toxic relationship.

what a nasty woman! So she puts her bloody dog above her grandchildren!? Despicable person

She considers it her fee for looking after her grandkids for three and a half hours… shocking. Tell her that she must repay you because you have to feed your kids. If she doesn’t then just ignore her. Block her and if she turns up tell her she’s not welcome. She can get lost. What a selfish and mean cf.

You seem to have a communication problem, OP.
You havent answered the question whether you asked you mother for money yet you think you have. If thats how you communicate with your mother too, its set up for failure.
Obviously you mother is in the very wrong to have taken the meat. Its one of the most ridiculous threads I have read on here in the odd 20 years.

What a drama-loving cow. Just reply “wow, I need to find a cheaper babysitter and agree costs upfront because I can’t afford that. Please give me back the £80 this time so the kids have enough food, and next time you want to see the kids we can agree the price before you come.”

And then block her for a bit.

What is her excuses for not transferring money then?! Totally appalling behaviour! You have my sympathy. I hope you can re-coup the money from her some how!

“Hi Mum, that’s not going to work for us, I’m afraid. Your grandchildren do need to eat between now and next month. Please transfer the £80 to me by —-day, when I’m next heading into town. I can replace the dinners for the grandchildren then.”

FFS, just message her your bank details and tell her to transfer the money immediately as you actually need it to feed your children. Grow a spine.

Your mum knew exactly what she was doing; she's a thief, literally stealing food from you and your children's mouths. Shocking behaviour.

Tell her to send you the money or she's not welcome any more.

Look at it this way... It's cost you 80 quid to remove some toxicity out of your life. Priceless!

We had houseguests who stayed at our holiday house when we weren’t there. They cleared the all prime cuts from our huge chest freezer, left shin meat & stew cuts!. We asked if they knew what happened to our meat, they said were doing us a favour by taking it, as it would go bad (frozen in like -40 freezer!!). We’re sure they thought we wouldn’t notice.
Needless to say, never ever ever had them at ours again despite them dropping huge hints for years.

I appreciate that life is tough for you right now but she has done this knowingly and if you don't insist on getting her to transfer the money now, her behaviour will just get worse and more outrageous - she is testing your boundaries. Just send her a simple message along the lines of 'I unfortunately don't have the money to replace the food you took, nor can I wait until next month. Please transfer the money to my account xxxx now. Thank you' Don't engage with any response other than 'the money has been sent'.

What are you gaining from this? Attacking the OP, newly separated from her H, struggling to cope and you are demanding specifics of if she asked for a bank transfer vs cash. She has said she asked for the money. Do you want receipts?

The OP does not owe you an answer.