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AIBU?

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Father's Day unwanted gift

91 replies

fedupforever · 16/06/2024 19:06

Husband hinted for an expensive gift for Father's Day, new sunglasses that would cost anything from £100 upwards. I bought a few bits the kids picked for him, the usual dad bits and bobs, chocolate etc and printed a voucher for the glasses and said we will go shopping as I don't know what style you'd like and can put money towards them if you like a very expensive pair.

Straight away his face was tripping him and he said the voucher was worthless as I'd given him vouchers in the past that had not been redeemed - for a new cinema that opened but when we hire a babysitter it's been for nights out and we didn't fancy the cinema as wanted to have a meal and drinks instead or went out with friends. This was something we had discussed prior to going out and both agreed the cinema didn't feel worth it when we were paying a lot of money for a babysitter.

I wasn't happy with the comment and thought it was really rude and quite selfish. We don't have much money and I don't buy myself much, I recently spent my birthday voucher he got me on a gift for a friend as I couldn't afford to buy one otherwise. I don't have spare cash to replace the voucher.

Aibu to think this comment was out of order and to feel hurt by this?

OP posts:
sevsal · 16/06/2024 19:26

Sunglasses seem like such an odd gift for father day. What kind of thing does he (or you for Mother's Day) normally get? I'm trying to work out if he wanted something within your ordinary gift giving. For us the kids always made a card and we bought some chocolates together for him. Now they are adults, they buy the card and chocolates themselves. No sunglasses.

Monkeybutt1 · 16/06/2024 19:25

That's so greedy, my 11 year old chose DH a bottle of whisky (not an expensive one) and made him some millionaires shortbread and helped me to make tea, that was his fave present. It's fathers day not a big birthday

Aposterhasnoname · 16/06/2024 19:25

Ereyraa · 16/06/2024 19:16

It’s supposed to be gifts from the kids, not a spoilt adult writing a shopping list

This. Seriously, WTAF! Father’s Day is a can of beer with a cheap engraved glass from the kids, not sulking because you’ve not got a pair of expensive sunglasses.

Workawayxx · 16/06/2024 19:25

What?! Surely “the usual Dad bits and bobs” and chocolate IS a decent present for Father’s Day?! Who asks for expensive gifts costing upwards of £100 especially if you don’t have too much spare cash. It’s not his birthday! I bought DP a jar of chutney and a lemon cake 😂.

I think I’d just say “take it or leave it” and next year just give him chocs and that’s it.

TheChosenTwo · 16/06/2024 19:24

So ‘the man who has everything’ has been rude to the woman who has seemingly not enough money to buy a friend a present?
He sounds like a spoilt prick.

DuesToTheDirt · 16/06/2024 19:24

Why are you buying him anything? He's not your dad. And it's not like your children are babies and too young to get anything from themselves. Plus, aren't father's day presents supposed to be chocolates or mugs or something, not expensive requests?

Littletreefrog · 16/06/2024 19:22

Sounds like a spoilt brat. If he wants sunglasses he can buy them himself. In my family you get what you are given and be thankful for it.

PiggieWig · 16/06/2024 19:21

Enjoy your new sunglasses OP 😎

Lindy2 · 16/06/2024 19:21

He sounds rather greedy picking himself an expensive gift, that you can't easily afford, for father's day. Father's day us about the children giving little gifts to show appreciation for their dad not greediness.

A box of chocolates, dad keyring, dad mug etc and a family lunch is much more what father's day is about.

He seems to think it's his birthday or Christmas. Even if it was, no one should ask their partner for something that isn't easily within their financial means.

Let him buy his own glasses.

susiedaisy1912 · 16/06/2024 19:19

Father's Day is about small personal gifts from the children. Have a chat with your Dh to discuss how much and what sort of gifts you can both expect for future Mother and Father's Day.

wurlycurly · 16/06/2024 19:19

He's not your father. The most I've ever done is encourage the kids to make a card and bring their dad a cup of tea in bed! That's all I would ever like on mother's day too

Frankgodno · 16/06/2024 19:19

What an ungrateful sod.

Ereyraa · 16/06/2024 19:16

It’s supposed to be gifts from the kids, not a spoilt adult writing a shopping list

ButWhatAboutTheBees · 16/06/2024 19:14

Well don't spend £100 on a gift.. if you can't afford to give him the cash then you can't afford to buy him the gift

fedupforever · 16/06/2024 19:13

I agree he needs to grow up. I've said this to him before and today and he can't take it. He takes big offence to being told he's behaving like a child. It's like a red rag to a bull but how do you explain he needs to grow up otherwise??

Really disappointed in his behaviour today. Had he not hinted for the glasses I would have got him some lovely presents to actually open as I'm not a fan of gifting vouchers or money. He's also the man who has everything so is hard to buy for

OP posts:
mummymeister · 16/06/2024 19:08

He needs to grow up doesnt he and behave like an actual adult. its fathers day not some significant birthday. a card and a token gift at most not money spent by the partner on a gift supposedly from the children. a handmade card and some chocolates. really is he like this at every birthday and christmas? make a deal with him. fathers and mothers day card and small token present in future.