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Misbehaving student

39 replies

callingwith · 16/06/2024 08:40

Hi everyone,

I need to know if I am being unreasonable.. Long story short, I am a private violin tutor, teaching from home. A couple of months ago, I received an enquiry re some beginner lessons for a six year old. Parent seemed a bit rude from the outset but i ignored this (big mistake) but I decided to give them a chance as the child was very keen on learning.

Child and mother come to my house. It is clear DC has behavioural issues, running up and down my stairwell, going into personal bedrooms, picking the plants in my driveway etc. I put so much effort into these bloody lessons as the child would sulk and refuse to do anything, lying on the floor refusing to move etc. I would try asking him questions about our learning, the mood of the music, etc. to pique his interest.

Now I receive communication from the parent saying it is MY FAULT I can't control her child, and it is the job of the teacher to make sure they are scared of you?! Also how they do not agree with my method of "constantly questioning the child, the teacher should dictate authority to the student" They also said their child never had behavioural issues when learning piano from another teacher, which I know is completely false (who are they trying to kid?).

Am i being unreasonable to let them go? I'm a conservatoire trained violinist by the way with a class of 20. Noone has ever accused me of anything like the above!

OP posts:
Cloudfluffy · 16/06/2024 08:51

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CocoapuffPuff · 16/06/2024 08:49

Terminate. Immediate effect.

Ragwort · 16/06/2024 08:49

Absolutely let them go ... and what was the parent doing whilst their DC behaved so badly in your house ? No doubt smiling indulgently about their DC's 'spirited behaviour'. Hmm

Not quite the same situation but I had a maths tutor for my DC who after two years explained, very nicely and politely that he felt they were no longer a 'good fit' and he didn't feel my DS was getting any benefit from the tutor sessions. I think that was a polite way of saying my DS was a lazy sod true. There were no hard feelings, we found another tutor and my DS got his maths A level and went on to study economics at Uni.

fashionqueen0123 · 16/06/2024 08:49

Unfortunately I am going to have to stop teaching X. Their behaviour is not appropriate for violin lessons and therefore they are not learning anything while here. Going into other rooms in my house and lying on the floor does not make for an effective learning environment. Many thanks, Calling with.

BrigadierEtienneGerard · 16/06/2024 08:48

Sorry, but I'm not sure why you are worrying about whether it's U or not U to dump this odious little brat?

Get rid of him and do both of you a favour.

CelesteCunningham · 16/06/2024 08:48

Definitely ditch them, I'm sure you'll fill the slot in no time.

Thehop · 16/06/2024 08:46

You're quite right, we are not well matched. Lessons will not continue with me and I wish Jonny well in his music endeavours.

ProfessorPeppy · 16/06/2024 08:45

‘Your child isn’t ready to learn. Try again in two years’ time [with someone else]’

Barefootsally · 16/06/2024 08:45

Throw this one back!

ellesbellesxxx · 16/06/2024 08:44

As a fellow peri teacher… the hills are that way ➡️🚩🚩🚩🚩

PithyLion · 16/06/2024 08:43

ofcourse it is not your fault, and yes, let them go - they are not getting anything out of it anyway

RandomMess · 16/06/2024 08:42

YANBU I would give the line that they don't seem happy with your teaching style so are terminating the contract.

Or do you need to be even more diplomatic?

LordPercyPercy · 16/06/2024 08:42

Definitely let this one go! Sounds like far more hassle than it's worth.

llamajohn · 16/06/2024 08:42

Drop them.

Easy.