Colleague has sent me a dick pic

He jeopardised his own career by sending that to you. He is testing out your boundaries.

Make an appointment to speak to someone in HR on Monday morning. Don't forward the picture. Is he in a position to influence your career negatively in future? I would be concerned that if you don't reply but also don't report, he may attempt to harm your career at a later date if he's worried you have something on him.

Take a screenshot and go straight to HR. Don't reply or respond to him; doing so could be seen - potentially - as encouragement. Obviously this is sexual harassment and gross misconduct. Revolting behaviour and totally unprofessional. Ugh!

At 41, this is not his first rodeo. He will have done it multiple times before. I am a great believer in being direct. I would tell him that you were disgusted and you don't want him to email you again unless it is essential for a work matter. Tell him that you want to have as little as possible to do with him in future and you expect him to absent himself from your unit's work drinks. If he cannot agree to this, you will be forwarding the whole thread to HR. I wouldn't feel the slightest bit bad about his career being affected because I think he has been at it for years. This is a middle aged man who has such a complete lack of judgment that he thinks it is appropriate to send a colleague a picture of him in his tiny shorts with an erection!

Sod not wanting to ruin his career. What he's done is a criminal offence - he's the one responsible for any career ruination, not you.

I'd screenshot and go to HR and the police.

Men like this are only going to stop doing this if there are consequences.

He’s the one who is going to look like an idiot. It’s made you really uncomfortable. Either tell him straight or tell HR. I’m o,d I’d tell him straight to his face.

I'd say lovely tan, but would rather not see your body again please as only interested in friendship.

Reply with the button mushroom emoji, then screenshot and report to HR.
This behaviour needs calling out ever time.

"Why the hell did you send this to me?!" msg to him & refer it to HR & blank & block him after that. What a pillock.

This is the why men continue to behave this way though, as women allow them to get away with it. It’s totally unacceptable / it is his fault, not yours if it jeopardises his job / not a good excuse not to do anything about it because “he goes to drinks too”. He’ll just move on to another woman. You have a chance to ensure he isn’t so stupid as to do this again.

I suffered sexual harassment like this in the work place at 18 and didn’t want to report it! Some older women in the company (20s/30s) all told me he’d done it to all of them too. At 18, in my first real job and absolutely terrified I wish wish wish one of those older women had reported it!

Please do, this was all his own doing and he deserves to be hauled up in front of HR and get told that this is wrong, because there will absolutely be other women after you if not- if he can do it so casually he clearly has zero boundaries and respect. Sadly that probably also shows it’s not the first time and he’s clearly comfortable and thinks it will get him somewhere 😫. So sorry this happened to you!

Just ignore it and don't engage again.

He will get the message and probably be shitting it thinking you could potentially go to HR.

If anything, I’d send the ‘puke’ emoji, and then block.

I think this refers to the non reporting which makes them think it’s acceptable and then they continue to do it. Admittedly if they didn’t do it in the first place we wouldn’t have to report it.

While I see you r point, you would be amazed how oblivious men like I was can be to how much of this goes on.
Reporting it will help but that obliviousness can be bad. It needed my wife and some colleagues to really open my eyes to it.
The other side is she might not get a sympathetic response. She has had a mixed response on MN (as did a rape victim), so her caution is understandable.

Oh yeh it’s the women’s fault as per. Victim blaming classic 👏🏼

Put a thumbs down then block
I wouldn’t report to HR but I would save it so I had it locked and loaded just In case.

I had a similar experience a couple of years ago and the following day walking into work knowing that he was going to be there made me feel physically sick. I managed to avoid him the first day. That physical reaction made me realise that I had to report him. It sounds like the OP is friendly and has previously had a bit of a laugh with this colleague, that doesn’t mean he can behave like this. Presumably the OP also has a good relationship with the other males she works with and yet none of them have behaved like this. I reported my colleague and taking into account how it still affects me two years later I would strongly suggest that she reports this behaviour to management/HR.

And we wonder why men keep on doing this. Because women let them. Laughing it off, not wanting to jeopardize his career...the list goes on. We need to call them up on it each and every time. Report to HR.

options are

1. ignore it

2)message back that’s it’s really offended you I’m not reporting it this t but never do that again

3. go to HR and raise complaint

its 100% what the best option for you

Block him and report

If it were me, I'd text him back something like "Unsolicited dick pics constitute sexual harrassment."

And then block him.

And keep the pic.

Keep him worrying for months and potentially years as to whether you'll tell HR or not.

Actually a good response. 🌹

I don't think I'd send a laughing emoji. If those messages ever got out (eg to another colleague, HR, etc) it would look like OP found his unsolicited dick pic funny and/or condoned it. Either take the situation to HR or block this tosser for a while and avoid him otherwise. 🌹

I too think you send it to HR. You can say I was sent this, I certainly didn’t ask for it. I’m sure if asked he will say he really just meant to show his tan, but I ask if you really think any professional man over 25 would accidentally take a close up of their erection and send it to a female colleague unsolicited. I don’t think so.

He has jeopardised his career. You need to take it to HR and let them deal with it.

As you said he may be doing it to other people and you don't know what else he could be doing to others.