Settle a debate: who does the groom toast in his speech?

Does it all really matter? It just drags the proceedings out ...

I agree this is the traditional arrangement (in the UK).

Why would it be either/or? Everybody toasts the bride!

I try to stay quiet when it comes to points of grammar but wedding toasts clearly send people into confusion https://medium.com/creators-hub/a-simple-trick-for-knowing-when-to-use-and-me-or-and-i-1c7e4e49e529

I hope the wedding went well @InNeedOfDebretts

But please don't say 'on behalf of my wife and I" because it's not grammatically correct. "My wife and me" is better 🙂

I'm from the north of Scotland and when DH and I got married my father (who knew about such things and was an excellent speechmaker himself) said that there should be four speeches but we had to choose people who could give good speeches to give the toasts and the best man and bridegroom should just do very short thankyous. So that's what we did. Someone who knew both my bridesmaids toasted them and the best man did the thanks then a friend of DH and mine toasted us and DH did the thanks. Less stress for the main people involved in the ceremony and entertaining speeches for the guests. So never mind what's traditional, think about how to entertain the guests. His other top tip was always have the speeches after the meal because your guests will be more receptive, with full stomachs and a few drinks in them.

Hear, hear. The last straight wedding I was at, the bride and groom made (brief) speeches about how fabulous the other one was, the best man sang a Nick Cave song, and the bridesmaid did simultaneous translation for everything else and did the toasts.

Then best man answers for bridesmaids and toasts the bride and groom again.

Not always these days. No men speaking on behalf of silent women at any weddings in my family!

What a load of sexist tosh tradition can be.

The groom toasts the bridesmaids. Always!

edit to add, these days he usually starts by saying ‘on behalf of my wife and I…’ cue massive cheer.

I hate weddings where lots of men speak and the women stay silent.

At ours the bride and groom did toasts and then best man and chief bridesmaid

There's something horribly dated about women, most of whom are successful professionals, staying silent on their wedding day

(Sorry, not the question you asked I know! )

Bride's father toasts the bride and groom or just the bride if he wants. Normally the couple.
Groom toasts the bridesmaids. And at our wedding also thanked my parents, who were the hosts (paid for the wedding). We did it traditionally but I don't think he toasted them.
Then best man answers for bridesmaids and toasts the bride and groom again.

No traditional toast for just the bride, but often an additional toast to one of the speeches.

He can toast who he likes, though there is a tradition which can be followed. I made a speech at my wedding, to pass on my own thanks.

I thought that was best man? Or am I getting confused because he's supposed to get off with one of them at the reception?

There is no current etiquette I should say.
The etiquette that was, is now old fashioned tradition.

Currently, there are no rules.

Anyone can toast anyone. All the day guests stood up and said something nice at our wedding and some did a toast as well, my husband made a toast to my mum and vice versa, I made a toast to my husband’s parents. My husband wrote and read a poem to me, I also did a speech. I didn’t have bridesmaids, It was great.

The whole ridiculous performance basically sums up why weddings should be a thing of the past.
So much money and pretence when almost every couple lives together before marriage anyway nowadays.

Of course there are if you follow etiquette and tradition.

The point is that these days you don't have to, so you do what you want

There are no set persons the wedding speakers toast. Grooms/brides often toast the friend that introduced them, their parents/siblings, new in laws, mentors/best man or maid of honour as well as their bride/groom.

The father of the bride speech is usually about joining two families, rather than a toast.

Traditionally bridesmaids. But also, at all the weddings I have been to, the groom has given a thank you present to the bridesmaids. Reading this back I realise this is a bit old fashioned as ,surely, it is down to the bride to give them a thank you present. Maybe your brother should liaise with his bride to be on this and find out what she is expecting

Traditionally, only the bridesmaids, as he speaks on behalf of both of you.
In the real world, I think it's much cooler for the bride to speak too.
Crucially, everyone needs to remember to "stand up, speak up and shut up", ie be clear, but brief!

At my own wedding, the best man (who'd had his own wedding already, and is the kind of person who knows these things, whereas we're not) said that what was typical was for the groom to toast the bridesmaids and that the best man should then accepted/replied to the toast on the bridesmaids' behalf - so that's what we did.

I thought the groom thanked everyone, compliments the bridesmaids and then tells a bit about how much he loves his wife and why he has married her, everyone cries and it ends with a toast to his new wife

This is always the case at the weddings I’ve been to, but the best man also has to come up with various stories about the groom which can be amusing though hopefully kind!

Yes, this is the ‘traditional’ structure.

(The toe-curlingly sexist structure where men speak on behalf of the women and the women don’t speak… might not be ‘what’s expected’ these days)