To be done with this forum..

The help I had with some things in RL when mine were small was truly shocking. So sometimes I do like to try and help some others going through similar stuff.

Sorry I've put that on totally the wrong thread by mistake. Sorry OP.

There can be nasty comments on here, and the worst are those who will read an awful comment, and then jump in, like putting the boot in. Bullying. But there are helpful comments amongst the shit OP, and you just have to sift through and ignore the shitty ones. They look for a reaction so just ignore. Bullys survive on you giving oxygen to their words, so just dont react.

Agree.

Though also seen threads turn nasty at any mention of trying to navigate relationships with in-laws or older relatives now you are a parent.

Or if anyone ever dares comment about drivers who do not have blue badges or are not with young children using parent and child bays. Apparently all those poor young men driving vans all have hidden disabilities that for some obscure reason do not qualify for a blue badge and they should be allowed to park in the 'it is just a courtesy spot anyway' parking bays designed for parents trying to get kids in car seats in and out safely.

Sorry, trying not to rant. But there does seem to almost be an anti new mum vibe to a lot of the nastier comments on some threads.

Is there a Tongue Tie Practitioner who will see you both sooner?

Don't worry. I got told I needed to be eradicated from society because I put poo bag in a skip. Then told I take and give nothing back. Completely bonkers because my job is the most giving you can get ! Crazy.

I think that might have been my thread @Peanutbutterfan . People mean well but honestly the suggestions that apparently MN toddlers find a hoot just - aren’t. Apparently a really exciting day if you’re a MN toddler is jumping in puddles and getting piss wet through, having a bath with disco lights then getting the sofa cushions off the sofa and leaping around on them.

I don’t want to disparage kindly meant advice but that day would depress the absolute hell out of me.

I was going to say, the only real time I see answers about parenting truly get out of hand on here is when neurodivergence is involved. The gobsmacking amount of ignorance on MN about autism is something to behold, like we suddenly time traveled back to the Victorian era. And don’t even get me started on having to explain that you’re a carer and a parent to your child, that’s like a red flag to a bull….

Thread police delete threads for fun with no rhyme or reason.

I have noticed this too OP. Also I’ve noticed a lot of posters aren’t very good at letting the OP vent if that’s what they need to do- they jump straight to solutions. And the advice can be very condescending. So for example someone posted recently about not knowing what to do with their young kids in this dreary weather & they got accused of lacking imagination & told that ‘there’s no such thing as bad weather only bad clothes.’ Also posters saying they would have a whole roster of activities planned & they never had that problem of coming up with ideas. I realise that’s a pretty tame example but I see it played out on a lot of threads & it really annoys me!

There are a lot of people on here. Blokes especially who are commited to being down Mumsnet from the inside. Men can't stand women talking amongst themselves.

This combined with people who aren't getting laid regularly and are unhappy in their lives makes a bit of a toxic soup.

You need a very thick skin to post threads I think and learn to swerve and ignore a lot of them. If they're personal attacks then report and ignore. If you don't feed them, they become obvious and shoot themselves in the foot.

I think Facebook parenting groups are kinder, probably because they aren’t anonymous.

It's always been a bit like this but gotten worse lately.
Years ago, I posted about a homeless person who was asking for money 'because he was hungry'. I bought him some food in the shop and he shouted at me to give some fucking money, he didn't want food. Was IBU to offer him food and not money.
I got completely slated on here, because what if he had allergies and how dare I just buy him food without asking him if he was allergic. Bonkers!

This section of MN is underused, underated and underappreciated

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/flouncers_corner

I’m sorry that you’ve been treated badly on here. Some people are very quick to jump on others, putting them down and totally lacking in empathy. Saying that though there are also lots of helpful advice and genuine concern from others.

Is there a way to get these people banned?

People are asking for constructive advice and instead they end up with a barrage of abuse. It's really not on.

Ahhh, sorry to hear that. I know nothing about ASD so won't comment on that but I do know about being in a horrible relationship where you feel trapped. It sounds like you are being overwhelmed from multiple directions so maybe take a deep breath and focus on the easier problems and get them semi-sorted first. This will give you more time and strength to deal with the bigger problem (your child) that is likely to last for years before being anywhere near resolved.

Get to a solicitor and start that particular ball rolling. He's only going to drag you down more.

Yep. MN can be wonderful, but there does seem to be an element who seem to enjoy giving someone else a good kicking. It's worse on other forums, from what I've seen.

Some people are mean for the sake of being mean. Once one starts others join in.

I think there is still kind and thoughtful advice out there, but there are definitely a depressing number of posters who seem to enjoy undermining people.

You really just have to learn to skip over the vipers, and try not to take it personally.

I have deleted my account several times because I've been upset at the responses.

When you are genuinely asking for help and advice and everyone piles on. I've had people say my kid is horrible and won't have any friends, when actually she's absolutely lovely and has loads of friends, but everyone on Mumsnet was acting like she's a serial killer.

People are nasty on here for absolutely no reason. I've probably come across 1 person in my life that's spoken to me like shit, and yet just judging by Mumsnet, around 70% of the population are like that! People hide behind their phones and write all sorts of horrible things when in real life they wouldn't say boo to a goose.

Pathetic behaviour.

I agree and I would call it out if I see it. I use mumsnet for about 5 or 10 per cent of users I can talk to normally