DH in a bad mood because I'm home late?

It’s his house too. He can clean it.

communication needs to be better as I’d be annoyed if I was kept waiting for food and the goalposts kept getting moved. He is a grown man and can make dinner for you when you work late and run the hoover over. He will survive.

I work some days 8-8pm so DH gets dinner ready for family when I walk in the door as our kid is 15 so he has mammoth snack when he gets home from school to keep him going. Then DH preps lunch for some days eg we will have salad one day and he will box up two salads for lunch next day so makes 5 meals.
He absolutely won’t clean the bathroom as it doesn’t seem to bother the boys in this house but other jobs he is on top of.

Drinks with a client that runs after work for over 2 hrs? That seems extreme. I'd be peed off too, especially as those messages make it sound like you'll be home soon.

@syndromeImposter

"So picked up beers, salad, chicken and pizza from a nearby deli and headed home.
Messaged an hour and a half later saying I was on my way with beers and pizza and he lost it."

Could this have something to do with it?

I 100% thought this too, in my head I saw an edgy woman constantly texting and trying to placate someone she knew would be grumpy with her by offering to buy him any snacks or food he wanted in the hope it might stop her getting shouted at.
I think in most equal relationships you just go "having after work drinks, will be late home, probably between 8 and 9, so feel free to have dinner without me and I'll sort myself out when I'm home". If he wants a takeaway he can go get it himself (unless they have kids in bed and then just get a delivery or cook the food available). It's a weird set of messages to send to a grown adult and also weird to feel like she'd need to bring him home something anyway. The only time I'd do it is if I was by an exciting shop like a giant tesco (we don't have one) or an M and S food hall and then I'd offer to grab a month's supply of percy pigs, but otherwise he knows where the shops and takeaways are, so him wanting pizza for dinner is not my problem

And he probably would have if she hadn't asked him what he would like brought back twice. Do you normally cook food when someone has told you they are bringing food back?

He's not mad that you're late....like he said, if he had known you were going to be that late he'd have just went himself for beers and takeaway, but what you've done is constantly call him or make it sound like you're just going home. The second time you called and picked up food....what did you do for 1.5hours to then have to phone and tell him yu we're now coming home? That's a huge wait and your deli pizza salad is laughable to a takeaway.

Poor communication.

If I was hungry and holding off on getting myself something to eat because I was waiting for my partner to come home with a delicious takeaway which she kindly agreed to get for us, I would also be a bit upset if she turned up at 8:30pm without it.

I don't know if you're in the wrong here; but surely you do?

How would you react if he said he was going to be a little bit late and asked if you wanted anything picking up; then an hour later said "do you need anything" then an hour and a half later finally said "I'm on my way home now do you need anything?"

If you were messaging me I'd assume after the first message you don't intend to be long, and then on the second message I'd assume you were on your way then.

If he'd gone and got himself a takeaway and not you, because you haven't said how long you'd be - how would you feel?

I personally would consider being 1hr 15mins to 2hr 15mins home late quite alot and if you didn't clarify this in the first message asking if he wanted anything I would assume you were leaving shortly and wait to have dinner with you etc. had I of known you were still going to be a couple of hours I would personally rather know so I could plan dinner accordingly, I would be annoyed too

But OP is the one who offered to bring home takeaway and who kept messaging him asking if he wanted anything

brought=BRING
bought=BUY

I would message my husband to let him know I would be late so that he could plan what time to have my dinner ready after I’d had a long day in a new job. Why is the bar set so low?

He's an ungrateful loser. He shouldn't be comfortable speaking to you like this

If he’s at home and you’re still out working surely he should sort his own food and it would be thoughtful of him to prepare bits for you too

He was probably annoyed because you told him you were bringing takeaway home and didn’t. You should have told him to order something or go and get takeaway when you decided you were no longer going to get one.

Absolutely no idea where you’ve got that from
it was lack of communication from OP and assumption from him
all he did was take OP up on her offer to get something on the way home
had she not messaged him or told him how long she’d be he would of sorted tea out no problem
He didn’t ask or expect

as many many many other have said if there partner did this they would assume they were coming directly home

in all the 5 messages OP never said she’d be hours or there was no take away available
instead she turn up with something you’d need to cook so he’d have to wait even longer

in the last 48 hours OP has done this about tea and cleared off out and dumped him with her share of housework

i wouldn’t describe him a a whinny lazy asre and I’ll hold my hand up I’d feel exactly the same as him

You sound like his skivvy and he sounds like a whiny lazy arse.
What is the point of him exactly?

Yea and very weird that you offered to get anything when you were having to walk and taxi….

not only did he have full use of a car but also had the things in house to cook! Weird set up….

weird he makes comment about having having to tidy up too… does he see that as your job?

This.

’Im going to be home late, you need to sort dinner for yourself and the kids tonight… don’t forget to feed the dog!’

Yes. This.

Why on earth did you message at 5 asking if he wanted anything? If that was me I would assume you were on your way home...and it wasn't till 8.30 you got home

That's true
It's MN
I didn't need to ask

Because he's a man so many so be nasty

Why do people willfully ignore the fact DH said he would have sorted it himself had he known???

If I had to guess, I would say he is reacting more to your new position and schedule. Some people get really upset when schedules change. You kept in contact, so he can't get upset about that. Although he could be upset about your home time constantly being pushed back. I think that since this is a new thing for you, you should sit down with him and explain that since this is new to you, you can't always tell how long things will/should take and can he give you some grace while you are figuring out your new job.
He was probably hangry, but if he wanted more than whatever you brought home, he should have expressed those wishes. He should have been like, "you have taken a while and I kept waiting for you to get home to eat so I would like something really tasty, like X" (would be curry or Chinese for me).