Would you let your child do this or am I over the top?

It's weird that you draw the line at your daughter walking down a hotel corridor Vs going around town independently.

For her to get snatched in a hotel far from home and full of strangers would seem to me far less likely than a predator in your town noticing your daughter's movements and routines, maybe striking up a conversation with her and her friend in the cafe they like to go to, coincidentally running into them there a few more times, befriending them, maybe buying them some age restricted items, offering a lift home when it's raining/to save on bus fare...

I don't think the local predator is that likely either, to be clear.

I agree with this.

I probably wouldnt have thought about so would have let her do it. If I'd thought about it I'd have said Ok - but leave the door open so we can hear if there is any commotion.

When you look at mitigating risks though you start from a position of what is entirely avoidable, then you see what can be reduced and then you see if it is necessary to tolerate that risk.

You are leaving out a really important aspect of mitigating risk which is understanding the level of the risk in the first place. Yes, it is totally avoidable risk regarding my child being hurt in a hotel corridor by a stranger. It's also such a low risk that the avoidability factor has to be considered in this context.

All decisions regarding risk are weighted. You are applying the same weight to a risk that has a 10% chance of happening as you are to one that's 50% or that's 0.000001%.

I'm with you OP, people who have lived easy lives don't realise what can happen!

Campsite rules: you can only have 1 drink and you must arrive with a husband, wife and 2.4 children. I don't think so.

@Goldenbear even with your example regarding your mum though you said yourself that it was a man who was known to be a bit dodgy. Statistically, I believe this sort of thing is notably down these days in terms of strangers, not least because we're better at spotting, policing and restricting access to people who are known offenders.

When I was growing up (30+ years ago), as teenagers, it was pretty common to be flashed. As I understand it, this does still happen, but I don't think I had a single female friend who hadn't been flashed at some point whereas I don't think that is necessarily true for teenage girls today (although maybe I'm wrong?). But, for example, at least half of us were flashed by the same dodgy guy, who hung out in the area. Again, certainly in large parts of the Western world, those sort of people are more likely to be moved on/arrested these days and there's a lot of sharing of information about them. Whereas in my day, everyone just told us to "avoid Dave". This is a good thing and it makes our children safer.

When you look at mitigating risks though you start from a position of what is entirely avoidable, then you see what can be reduced and then you see if it is necessary to tolerate that risk. I see this risk as avoidable as it doesn’t need to happen at all, getting into a car is a risk than may have to be tolerated in order to get somewhere that isn’t possible without a car but you reduce the risk by putting your seatbelt on, not drink driving, not driving when tired etc. risk of a relative harming your child is unknown until after the event so would be tolerated as unavoidable without a crystal ball.

Seeing the entire US as a gang ridden, gun obsessed hellhole is a popular trope on here, though TBF there are some areas which are exactly that

But unless OP's been very unwise in picking where to stay I doubt she has much to worry about, and certainly no more than she would anywhere else

Exactly this!

When my SD was 10 we went to a caravan park with her aunt and cousin. Cousin is a few years younger and autistic, he wasn't keen on going out much or socialising and doesn't sleep at night. She made loads of friends and we spent a lot of time sitting outside the caravan, relaxing/reading etc. whilst SD ran around with a pack of children she'd met, in and out of our eyesight but within calling distance. A couple of times she asked if she could go with the kids to the park on the site which was fine with us so long as she stayed with her friends, we could find her at the park if we needed to and she wouldn't go anywhere else. She had a brilliant time.

The following year, her Mum took her on the same holiday to the same caravan park with the same aunt and cousin.

She came back and said she'd had an awful time, her Mum hadn't let her leave the caravan without direct adult supervision and because cousin didn't want to go anywhere, she'd spent most days sitting in the caravan watching TV and being bored to death. When she asked why she couldn't go off outside and play, her Mum used Madeleine McCann as the excuse. It really does scare me that adult women equate letting an 11 year old play outside without constant helicoptering with leaving babies to sleep alone in a different building.

Oh ffs
Now in the less than 5 minutes it takes the girl to walk down the corridor of the fairly nice hotel and back at 10pm a gunfight is going to spontaneously break out like they're in the slums

I don’t think she’s missing out on anything by not being able to put stuff in a bin

Probably not, no, but I'd worry more about the message I was giving her than the microscopic chance of her being snatched

Like so much else it's a question of balance, and while encouraging caution's wise, showcasing outright paranoia's perhaps less so

You are completely over the top and are running the risk of giving your daughter a heightened level of fear of anywhere that is not home.

and yes abductions happen, or getting caught in gang warfare. But all kinds of accidents happen at schools. Relatives at home could harm children. If a child is abducted, it is in majority of cases not a stranger. Car accidents clearly much higher risk than hotel hallway abductions. How do you operate with 0 risk?

Absolutely I would, easy enough to leave the door open if you're worried.

no and? How would CCTV made any difference to an instant decision of a criminal?

I thought the OP was discussing her 12 year old not a teenager? I wouldn’t go camping to begin with but if i did it would depend on where the campsite was; whether it welcomed all demographics I.e families, single people, people that drank excessively, loads of things

Hotels and campsites mine have been allowed to go to the toilet unescorted since they were about 6.

I have no intention of going to the U.S. anytime soon for a number of reasons. I would actually be more concerned about people with sinister intentions, I have literally used my Mum’s experience as an 8 year old as an example.

I do think lots of this comes down to your experiences in life and if you are lucky enough to have not experienced the bad side of humans and lived in a bit of bubble where everyone is as reasonable as you then your approach to life is entirely different.

You have anxiety issues you’re being irrational

Genuine question to the more cautious minded.... What would you do on a campsite? Would you escort your teenagers to the toilet block for every wee? At what age would they be allowed to wee alone?

I'm prepared to bet there was no CCTV when your Mum was 8.

Crikey this escalated.
What started off as taking the bin out has now turned into gangland warfare.

If there's going to be a sudden gunfight in the corridors of the Marriott, OP's child is just as likely to get shot if she is with her parents as if she is on her own. If that is what bothers you, just don't go to the US.

I would let my 8 year old go.

No, you wouldn't know which room, but the hotel would.

In the unlikely event they don't have CCTV on that specific corridor, it would be very easy to see that 12 yo did not get to the lift or leave through the lobby.

The hotel would be easily able to gain access to every room on the corridor and locate 12 yo within minutes of the alarm being raised.

The average paedophile/murderer takes into consideration the likelihood of being caught and would not do something which would result in them being identified and arrested within half an hour or accessing a child.