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AIBU?

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DH & alcohol

28 replies

Whywhy85 · 12/06/2024 20:34

I think DH is unreasonable. But thinks I am.
i worry he is drinking too much. On average a bottle of wine per night on weeknights & also on weekends, but also some beer or whisky on weekend.
he does well at work, recently got a promotion.
never late. But he sleeps through everything and gets really wobbly in evenings leaving me to deal with toddler. He says it’s not because of alcohol he’s just tired. But I think he’s be less tired if he didn’t drink so much?
I think he’s in denial & I want to be more blunt with him but I don’t know how. I haven’t said anything to him for a while because he gets annoyed when I bring it up. But that just makes me think he’s too dependent on it.
when I asked him in the past why he needs it everyday, he said he doesn’t need it. So I asked why he keeps drinking every day then.
mid also said in the past I’d like to be intimate without him drinking alcohol because it effects things, and could he wait until after we make love. But he can’t help it. He just has to have a drink or two first.
every day his breath smells of red wine and when I try to tell him he gets annoyed. I told him I’m trying to help him but it never seems to be the right time.
to anybody else he probably seems fine.

bit AIBU or is DH?
please help
x

OP posts:
Strictlymad · 12/06/2024 20:47

That is an enormous amount and he is an alcoholic. If he ‘doesn’t need it’ he should be able to just stop- but he can’t so he’s dependent. That will be damaging his health, his bank account and his relationships. He really really needs help. I’m sorry you are going through this. My dh is a recovering Alcoholic and it’s a tough road for all of you full of lumps and bumps but it’s so worth it. Sending you lots of hugs

Menora · 12/06/2024 20:46

You are not being unreasonable he clearly has an issue. Can you reach out to Al-anon who are for family support?

TangerinePlate · 12/06/2024 20:44

I’m sorry but your husband is an alcoholic.

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