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AIBU?

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To find what’s happened to Michael Mosley quite anxiety provoking

966 replies

Glasto73lover · 10/06/2024 18:14

It’s that idea of never really knowing what’s going to happen- the idea that we walk such a fine line in life. If you think too much about it, you probably wouldn’t leave the house.!

A close family member died suddenly and tragically a decade ago - literally dropped dead at home age 48 - something went pop in their head. So you genuinely don’t know when your time is up.

It’s that idea of a chain of consequence that can go so horribly wrong too- people always say ‘oh but you could get hit by a bus’ - stuff like this actually makes me really anxious. So many what ifs.

For Michael Moseley - a chain of probably inconsequential decisions may have led to his death- not having a phone on him, choosing to undertake a walk that in the U.K. is nothing but in that heat, was devastating and probably caused his death.

It makes me anxious that I won’t know if I am making those decisions - am I making sense? I think as I have got older, I have become more anxious and risk averse (thanks menopause) and as a result, you could end up not leaving the house. How do you choose a sensible approach? Not too much risk but some!

But I also want to live my life too!! I guess I find incidents like this quite difficult!

I guess always having a phone, not undertaking walks in intense heat in an unfamiliar place etc are the common sense points that will come out of this tragedy.

Aibu to find it anxiety provoking tho?!

OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
BonifaceBonanza · 13/06/2024 13:37

He thought he was taking a 30 minute walk with good sun protection. It’s a tragedy that he seems to have got lost one way or another.

westisbest1982 · 13/06/2024 13:32

He was 67, told nobody where he was going, was a medical professional, didn’t take his phone, and had a history of amnesia. It don’t think he was stupid, but he was certainly unwise.

ssd · 13/06/2024 13:11

I think what people are saying is if there's one person who you'd put money on being sensible and not hiking in extreme heat with no phone and a little water, it would be MM.

That's why what happened is so mystifying. I think he was more of an adventurous risk taker than he made out from his healthy eating programmes.

Anyotherdude · 13/06/2024 13:09

I don’t think he was exhibiting stupidity at all. He was, by all accounts, less than 300 feet from the path, and died of natural causes.
Some people drop dead in their living room, or running for the bus to get to work, or running a marathon. He could have just had a cardiac arrest that would have happened wherever he was.
YABU to be anxious about it: it’s the one part of life that’s inevitable, so live your best one, as he undoubtedly was…

Disturbia81 · 13/06/2024 13:00

Lentilweaver · 13/06/2024 10:51

An American hiker has gone missing on another island now. Sorry can't link at the moment.

Has made me think about all the solo walks and hikes I do. Usually not in remote areas but will be downloading that finder app...

And there's so many British men who have gone missing on greek islands just in the last 10 years and they are never found. MM has just brought attention to it.

Lentilweaver · 13/06/2024 10:51

An American hiker has gone missing on another island now. Sorry can't link at the moment.

Has made me think about all the solo walks and hikes I do. Usually not in remote areas but will be downloading that finder app...

JamieFraserSporran · 13/06/2024 08:55

@TempestTost being really alone? Not having a phone? The problem is that other people end up involved in searches be it mountains in Scotland or islands in Greece for these people and potentially endangering their lives. I'm not saying this was his attitude btw.

nobeans · 13/06/2024 07:51

PassingStranger · 13/06/2024 00:05

Your not sorry to sound cold so why say it?
You don't know what resources he had, you don't know what happened.
A phone may not have saved his life as said anyway.
It's not helpful what your saying either.
It's happened now. No point going on.
You better hope something dosent happen to you one day.
If it did would you like strangers picking everything you did apart?

Absolutely agree. If people want to stick the boot in they should just own that.

PassingStranger · 13/06/2024 00:05

DaisyChain505 · 10/06/2024 18:29

I’m sorry to sound cold but this incident was a case of you play silly games and you win silly prizes.

Going for a walk in an unknown place in extreme heat without the correct resources or enough water and without a phone!

Your not sorry to sound cold so why say it?
You don't know what resources he had, you don't know what happened.
A phone may not have saved his life as said anyway.
It's not helpful what your saying either.
It's happened now. No point going on.
You better hope something dosent happen to you one day.
If it did would you like strangers picking everything you did apart?

bakebeans · 12/06/2024 23:53

Gettingbysomehow · 10/06/2024 18:23

I feel absolutely furious with him. Quite unreasonably as I don't know him. Why did a medical doctor think it was OK to go for a long walk in 40 degree heat at the height of the day with one very small bottle of water and no phone????
He wasn't young either. He was 67.
Sheer stupidity.
Now his wife is on her own for her whole retirement. He won't see his kids marry or have children.
Older single women as I know very well often get abandoned by their married friends after the husband has gone. It takes time but in couple of years she will be lonely.
The utter stupidity of the whole thing made me feel sick and depressed.

I agree. I actually thought he was chose to walk to his death.

like you say. Why would someone with sense do that. He walked past a cafe didn’t he?
it was blistering heat and known as an abyss. He was a clever man so why would u walk into the unknown without your phone or water

blueshoes · 12/06/2024 23:43

TempestTost · 12/06/2024 22:49

I think you are missing the point.

People can take a phone if they want.

But there is a real difference in attitude today. How many parents won't let kids, even teens, out without a phone because they won't be able to contact them? This radically changes the sense that kids have of being responsible for their own situation.

And it's radically changed people's sense of risk. A generation ago, even in my childhood, no one would have thought it far out to go on a canoe trip for a few weeks into the wilderness. Intrepid, sure, something that required proper planning, sure. But not something unthinkable without a cell phone.

Not everyone feels the need to do every possible thing to make every situation "safer". They care to make the risk something they are happy with. The ultimate safety mindset is often quite debilitating in the end.

Being really alone is something a lot of people value.

I am not sure how your point of people wanting to be alone above safety (well that maybe in the older generation who is nostalgic about the past) is relevant in the context of this thread.

TempestTost · 12/06/2024 22:49

godmum56 · 12/06/2024 11:10

oddly (and I am 70) that's not how I remember it 40 years ago. No we didn't phone or telegraph from ships often, but definitely for birthdays and similar occasions. in the early 90's DH and I went to the US with his job and I used to phone my Mum for a chat once a week, also phone the in laws. Yes it wasn't cheap but definitely affordable. the line was always clear and fine. I do think though that "ordinary people" did do less sensationalist things. the clearest example of this is more people climbing Everest, but I also think that generally more people do undertake more extreme activities casually and that part of the reason for this is better safety options including communication. I don't know about younger people being anxious...or older ones. For myself, I find it much more convenient to have my mobile with me when I am out...as anyone who has broken down miles from anywhere (yes its possible in the UK) will tell you. Yes I know that mobile coverage isn't perfect but some is surely better than none? Of course we didn't just stay in doors, that is a silly comment, but if there is a development that increases safety then why deliberately choose not to use it?

I think you are missing the point.

People can take a phone if they want.

But there is a real difference in attitude today. How many parents won't let kids, even teens, out without a phone because they won't be able to contact them? This radically changes the sense that kids have of being responsible for their own situation.

And it's radically changed people's sense of risk. A generation ago, even in my childhood, no one would have thought it far out to go on a canoe trip for a few weeks into the wilderness. Intrepid, sure, something that required proper planning, sure. But not something unthinkable without a cell phone.

Not everyone feels the need to do every possible thing to make every situation "safer". They care to make the risk something they are happy with. The ultimate safety mindset is often quite debilitating in the end.

Being really alone is something a lot of people value.

Riversideandrelax · 12/06/2024 21:15

westisbest1982 · 12/06/2024 20:10

There’s nothing to disagree about. We don’t know where he was going and that’s a fact.

As I said I disagree.

SallyWD · 12/06/2024 20:22

westisbest1982 · 12/06/2024 20:10

There’s nothing to disagree about. We don’t know where he was going and that’s a fact.

I'm pretty certain he was going home, probably having a little wander around en-route. Remember the police were searching the route home and they got their information from speaking to his wife. Practically every single report said he was on his way back to the house. I think people got confused when his wife said he'd gone for a walk - but that could easily mean a walk home or a walk around the area before heading home. She said he took a wrong turning implying he should have been heading the other way - I.e. Home.

westisbest1982 · 12/06/2024 20:10

Riversideandrelax · 12/06/2024 19:53

I disagree. He was going back to their holiday home. That was why the search started in that direction until they realised from CCTV that he'd gone in the opposite direction.

There’s nothing to disagree about. We don’t know where he was going and that’s a fact.

Riversideandrelax · 12/06/2024 19:53

westisbest1982 · 12/06/2024 16:33

But he was planning to go back to their holiday home in the opposite direction of this mountain range. In fact he was planning to get the bus from Pedi.

No, these things haven’t been confirmed. We only know he was going for a walk.

I disagree. He was going back to their holiday home. That was why the search started in that direction until they realised from CCTV that he'd gone in the opposite direction.

Uricon2 · 12/06/2024 19:51

I think there is a big difference between doing sensible things that can promote a longer, healthier life and seeing any of those things as guarantees, because they're really, really not.

My younger brother has always been very sporty and fully embraced the gym. He had to have a hip replacement in his 40s (too many marathons/road runs) when extremely tall and rangey, quite different to the small wiry people who tend to excel at these. He pointed out "Well, Nan had a hip problem". Yes, Bro, she was 88 (in the early 1980s when that was really old) and fell over. She was one of the scone loving old ladies mentioned by a PP who thought lard was a healthy cooking medium and "gym" was a misspelling of "Jim".

There is no telling, sometimes.

Riversideandrelax · 12/06/2024 19:45

headstone · 10/06/2024 19:47

People are still implying his behaviour wasn’t extreme on that day even though the locals and the mayor clearly thought it was. I think the late Dr Mosley was terrified of ending up like his father and had the motto what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. I tried his 800 cal diet very extreme tbh and couldn’t manage it more than a few days. I think as you get older you shouldn’t put your body through extremes as you get older, you have to be very in tune to what your body is telling you. Even younger sports people are now found to suffer more from things like motor neurone disease.

But his plan was to get a bus from Pedi. Yes, his behaviour was extreme which suggests there was something wrong.

I personally found his plan very easy to follow. But obviously different things suit different people. His plan does have options though - you can just do 800kcals on 2 days per week.

LoveRules · 12/06/2024 19:24

This is a good short documentary about his death and his work/legacy

www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m0020jxw

Fireangels · 12/06/2024 17:49

Other than ‘natural causes’, we don’t really know yet exactly what happened to him. Yes it’s possible that he was overcome by heat /dehydration, but it’s also possible that he suffered a devastating cerebral or cardiac event which led to his collapse. If this was the case, not having a phone or water with him wouldn’t have made any difference to the outcome. This is just so very sad, but it isn’t really helpful to speculate or lay blame until we know more.

Disturbia81 · 12/06/2024 17:35

@Thebellofstclements The ME is a vast place, I lived there and literally said it was cooler than Qatar. It was 30-35c in the summer, but experienced 40c at the dead sea. So literally the same as Greece.

Thebellofstclements · 12/06/2024 17:27

Disturbia81 · 12/06/2024 10:06

So true, so many died from heat building the Qatar world cup stadiums and they had lived their lives in hot countries. I know people who lived there and the school day finished by 1pm to avoid the heat. Air con everywhere. People didn't go out in sun in the heat of the day unless for very quick moving A to B
I lived in the ME myself but wasn't as hot as qatar, I love walking but was warned never to go in heat of the day. I went to some ruins once in my 20s and nearly passed out, the heat/sun bounces off the light rocks which makes it worse. The time I got sunstroke I wasn't even moving, just by a pool there.
I was a silly Brit who'd never really been into sunbathing and tanning and just drank up all the sun I could when I first arrived, like I'd been starved of it in the UK. The family I was staying with thought I was mad. It was a harsh lesson but has stuck with me, the sun is not to be fucked with

Temps in the Middle East are around 50°C in the summer, that is incomparable with 35° in Greece. In South Asia now we are generally 38-43°C and it's roasting hot but a 45 minute stroll in the hills wouldn't kill a westerner, with a parasol/hat. The locals are more used to it, but no one envies those digging roads (with picks and shovels), it is sweltering.

Calliopespa · 12/06/2024 17:03

Nevergonnagiveuup · 12/06/2024 15:42

I’m a physiotherapist and I’ve spent many years working in paediatrics and then the rest of my career in palliative care, so the beginning and ending of life . I have also been a bit of a health freak and ardent fan of Michael Mosley. My observations of over 30 years working in the health sector on either ends of the age spectrum, is that we are all so incredibly fragile. I treated children that had unusual, avoidable but life changing accidents ( falling on a pen, swallowing a lollipop, being hit by random golf ball , being run over on a zebra crossing, to name just a handful). It’s a miracle we are actually born never mind making it through childhood/ teen years.
Whilst working in palliative care, I witnessed the fittest most health conscious people succumb to cancer/ neurological diseases. It was truly heartbreaking.
A few months ago I got absolutely annihilated on a thread by the OP who insisted we could largely control our own destiny by taking certain health measures. I think we can adopt a sensible attitude and take responsibility for our own health but aging and deterioration of the body is inevitable. Our skeleton, the scaffolding of our bodies weakens and there is a decrease in bone density making us more likely to fracture bones if we fall. We lose muscle mass and joint flexibility with our advancing years. Our kidneys, heart, brain function decline and don’t get me started on lung capacity and falling VO2 max! It is very depressing.
I think people(me included) like to feel in control of the aging process and struggle with their mortality as it’s such a difficult concept to come to terms with. I religiously stand on one leg, do flexibly exercises, plank, walk daily etc but I’m not altogether convinced it’ll make much difference but I live in hope!
RIP Michael Mosley -you seemed a like you were beautiful soul and you will be missed

Edited

A very balanced post. And yes “ hope” - and desire - play a big part in the results people expect from their attempts to control outcomes.

Calliopespa · 12/06/2024 17:01

Waitingfordoggo · 12/06/2024 16:58

I don’t disagree- but I think hard cardio such as HIIT, Bodyattack or fast running probably isn’t necessary. You can get a cardio workout by walking up a steep hill or even with weights if you lift heavy enough!

There also a big difference - healthwise - between morbid obesity and “overweight.”

Concepts of ideal weight have moved about over time.

Calliopespa · 12/06/2024 16:59

Allfur · 12/06/2024 16:15

So women's fertility is comparable to men hunting? Who hunts these days?

Are you being deliberately perverse?