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AIBU?

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To find what’s happened to Michael Mosley quite anxiety provoking

966 replies

Glasto73lover · 10/06/2024 18:14

It’s that idea of never really knowing what’s going to happen- the idea that we walk such a fine line in life. If you think too much about it, you probably wouldn’t leave the house.!

A close family member died suddenly and tragically a decade ago - literally dropped dead at home age 48 - something went pop in their head. So you genuinely don’t know when your time is up.

It’s that idea of a chain of consequence that can go so horribly wrong too- people always say ‘oh but you could get hit by a bus’ - stuff like this actually makes me really anxious. So many what ifs.

For Michael Moseley - a chain of probably inconsequential decisions may have led to his death- not having a phone on him, choosing to undertake a walk that in the U.K. is nothing but in that heat, was devastating and probably caused his death.

It makes me anxious that I won’t know if I am making those decisions - am I making sense? I think as I have got older, I have become more anxious and risk averse (thanks menopause) and as a result, you could end up not leaving the house. How do you choose a sensible approach? Not too much risk but some!

But I also want to live my life too!! I guess I find incidents like this quite difficult!

I guess always having a phone, not undertaking walks in intense heat in an unfamiliar place etc are the common sense points that will come out of this tragedy.

Aibu to find it anxiety provoking tho?!

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Applesandbananaz · 11/06/2024 21:28

@westisbest1982 thank you for clarifying this. I hadn't appreciated that the autopsy had been conducted. I still wish they'd checked the CCTV to spare his loved ones so much desperate searching. Such a tragic accident.

Disturbia81 · 11/06/2024 21:26

@Calliopespa For me it was the most intense nausea I've ever had, felt like it was waves through my body. Headache like it was going to explode, dizzy, sharp stomach pain. I wanted to be sick and shit myself at the same time. And my skin felt cooked and painful. I couldn't move from the spot I was in without being lifted up. It crept up on me so suddenly. Just can't imagine being in my late 60s and navigating a rocky steep landscape while feeling like that 😢

milveycrohn · 11/06/2024 21:23

My DBIL collapsed on a walk recently. Neither my DS nor BIL had their phones with them! Fortunately, a local person came to their assistance and they were given a lift back to their holiday accommodation. Not heat exhaustion, as this was in the UK, and the usual dreadful weather we have been having. Re CCTV It takes a long time to go through the CCTV. Initial reports stated it was from a boat in the marina, so this could be why it was not found earlier.

Calliopespa · 11/06/2024 21:00

Disturbia81 · 11/06/2024 19:03

I had it in my 20s and I've never felt so ill in my life, and that was by a pool with lots of drink and shade available. Poor guy

What does it feel like?

SophiaElise · 11/06/2024 20:52

Apologies if this has already been posted as I've only just seen this thread and can't go back 30 pages, but I'm surprised so many people are still not aware that this can happen in hot weather:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-latin-america-67826945

Taylor Swift performs onstage at Estadio Olimpico Nilton Santos in Rio de Janeiro on 17 November

Taylor Swift fan died of heat exhaustion at Rio concert, tests show

The fan collapsed at a Taylor Swift concert in Rio de Janeiro during a heatwave in the Brazilian city.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-latin-america-67826945

cosmicfig · 11/06/2024 20:52

This reminds me of that saying “life is short so enjoy every moment because it could be your last” or something like that - it’s the most depressing thing to say and makes me feel anxious.

Since my 40s I started thinking about death,
mortality etc a lot more but now I find the best thing to do is to just force myself to not think about things like that. I get busy and move on.

It’s literally pointless to worry about (but I know sometimes it’s not that easy)

Happyharry2003 · 11/06/2024 20:45

ABirdsEyeView · 10/06/2024 19:12

I also find it very frightening how mundane decisions (like not charging your phone in time and therefore not having it with you, when you decide to go for a walk) can potentially be the difference between living or not.

Menopause has massively increased my anxiety levels (which I was always prone to). HRT has helped a lot, but I try not to dwell on how precarious life can be - it would drive me insane if I thought about it too much.

Someone said to me that it's rarely the things you worry about that actually happen. Mostly you get blindsided by something you could never have seen coming, and therefore could never have controlled or prevented, on a random Tuesday. That frightens me tbh - all you can do is try not to think too much!

I totally get this but my mind ends up trying to think of alllllll the worst things that can happen so I don’t risk getting blindsided!

westisbest1982 · 11/06/2024 20:43

Same as I posted previously, it's to help us believe that we have some control when we really have none.

You're completely wrong, and I think this is inappropriate to post on a popular online talk forum.

westisbest1982 · 11/06/2024 20:42

Applesandbananaz · 11/06/2024 19:36

Is anyone else just absolutely gutted that the Marina didn't check their CCTV until afterwards? I feel like so much heartbreak could have been prevented if everyone in the area had just had a good look at their CCTV for the afternoon he went missing. Absolutely devastated to lose MM.

He died at 4.00pm on the Wednesday, 2.5 hours after he went for the walk, he was reported missing at 7.30pm, so his death couldn't have been prevented in terms of the CCTV checking.

Waitingfordoggo · 11/06/2024 20:37

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I think that would be a very unlikely method to choose for suicide.

time4anothername · 11/06/2024 20:33

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There is absolutely no indication of this. His friend Tim Spector has written two articles now mentioning how MM took risks with his physical self and under estimated danger to himself. The Times Radio reporter shared police info today that MM was found in a recovery position someone with medical knowledge would put themselves in if in distress and even by a tiny trickle of running water. He seems to have taken the wrong, longer path at a confusing junction which has been described in a blog that a number of posters have linked higher up. This led to a much longer and steeper walk up and down to the beach so he came down the longer North side instead of the shorter South side. Heat stroke takes blood away from the brain so decision making is impaired but he seems to have had somewhat of an automatic pilot to do the advised thing, it was just too late.

urbanbuddha · 11/06/2024 20:19

Applesandbananaz · 11/06/2024 19:36

Is anyone else just absolutely gutted that the Marina didn't check their CCTV until afterwards? I feel like so much heartbreak could have been prevented if everyone in the area had just had a good look at their CCTV for the afternoon he went missing. Absolutely devastated to lose MM.

Yes, I thought that was strange too when there was a major search going on.

Damnedidont · 11/06/2024 20:19

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Motheroffourdragons · 11/06/2024 20:11

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Motheroffourdragons · 11/06/2024 20:10

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venus7 · 11/06/2024 20:06

LiterallyOnFire · 11/06/2024 19:46

That's not fair. It's good MN etiquette to say if you think you recognise someone.

Thank you; that's what I believed too.

DaisiesInTheAir · 11/06/2024 20:06

Disturbia81 · 11/06/2024 19:03

I had it in my 20s and I've never felt so ill in my life, and that was by a pool with lots of drink and shade available. Poor guy

I'm glad you made a good recovery @Disturbia81 your age at the time will certainly have helped!

venus7 · 11/06/2024 20:04

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No need.........

Gwenhwyfar · 11/06/2024 19:53

PadstowGirl · 10/06/2024 18:35

My DH is 64 and honestly he doesn't think that he is even slightly older or more vulnerable. He acts like he is 30, doing "daft" things like really vigorous games of tennis/football in the heat of summer.
They think they are invincible.

I guess that's the downside of the trend of claiming that we are younger for longer these days. People don't want to accept they're getting old.

Motheroffourdragons · 11/06/2024 19:49

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AnnaSewell · 11/06/2024 19:48

For me it isn't about blaming.

It's about answering people who are worried about whether a particular physical activity - i.e. walking - is risky.

The answer is no, it isn't. If you are mindful of conditions, have navigational skills and are properly equipped then you can walk challenging routes.

If you are less skilled and only wearing everyday clothing, shoes etc., then you stick to more populated, shorter, flatter, less challenging routes.

LiterallyOnFire · 11/06/2024 19:46

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That's not fair. It's good MN etiquette to say if you think you recognise someone.

Goldenbear · 11/06/2024 19:45

Efacsen · 11/06/2024 17:21

Yes definitely - there's a saying 'the canary on your garden wall is more likely to be a sparrow'

Plus expect that Dr M would have had an ECG at some point during his experiments on himself for insurance purposes - that would have most likely revealed any issues with electrical conductance in his heart

That’s a very good point about the tests for insurance purposes. A good saying aswell.

Motheroffourdragons · 11/06/2024 19:45

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venus7 · 11/06/2024 19:43

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Of course there are.........but I think, from your username, and the way you express yourself, that I know you. Happy to ignore it, if you are. I don't loiter here often!