Page 8 | To not give builders food

ThiswillDoItsfine · 2024-06-10T12:43:53+00:00

Help me settle this difference of opinion. I have a company coming out in 3 weeks time to install a lot of fencing. I mentioned to dh that I will get them coffee, tea, and biscuits/cookies in to have with drinks. Dh is saying just the drinks is fine, and for me to just offer it as and when. The job is going to take 2 days. I want to give the men something to eat as well, at the very least. DH is then saying he doesn't want them trailing through the house, which I do understand. However, I was going to set a table outside with a flask, tea bags, coffee, milk & sugar, and bowl of biscuits so that they could help themselves. I thought this would be less restricting and mean that they can get it when they want, without waiting for me to ask. I also think it saves me running around when i have a child to look after. DH is saying that this is well over the top. Is this okay? Or is it wrong i set this up outside for them? It is an outdoor job, so I thought it would be easier all around, and they'll be working hard. Thank you.

Westfacing · 10/06/2024 16:48

Tea, coffee & biscuits is hardly 'food' - it's basic hospitality to provide these to visitors to your property.

PocketSand · 10/06/2024 16:45

I always offer but have found recently (maybe since Covid) that most refuse. I almost feel offended as this is my only role.

Polite to offer but maybe Covid made it OK to refuse - especially when increased fees means tradespeople earn decent money and can make their own choices and don't have to rely on the largesse of those that employ them. It's not like they will go hungry and thirsty otherwise. They will definitely need the loo though. So maybe offering a loo is more important.

NigelHarmansNewWife · 10/06/2024 16:40

ThiswillDoItsfine · 10/06/2024 14:24

Exactly, I only want to put out a selection of individually wrapped biscuits and chocolate bars, some packets of Crisps to go with their drinks. Some ppl have mentioned sandwiches, pizza, bacon rolls and toast. I feel this would seem a bit over the top for a 2 days fence job?

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Tbh a packet of digestives would do, but there's nothing wrong with providing drinks and snacks

Sunnyandsilly · 10/06/2024 16:40

Seaweed42 · 10/06/2024 16:25

""they can get it when they want, without waiting for me to ask."

But they aren't waiting for you to ask.

Some builders say no, not to be polite, but because it's more professional not to get involved in taking tea and biscuits from your client.

Because relationships can be sour later on. That's why they refuse.

When they come in and do a shite job and then you feel like you know them and can't say 'oi here Jimmy you can't leave that like that!'

How’s it more professional to not have a cup of tea. And how possibly can you feel like you know them as you provided tea. Don’t be daft.

BobbyBiscuits · 10/06/2024 16:38

You don't need to supply any food or drink. They can get their own, and presumably they take a lunchbreak? But if you want to set that stuff up for them that's fine. Nice gesture but it's not necessary. You're not a cafe, you're their employer/client. They won't expect anything from you and will be too busy working hopefully to drink and eat much outside of their break.
You should obviously offer water in abundance if they don't have their own though.

Original poster

ThiswillDoItsfine · 10/06/2024 16:35

Seaweed42 · 10/06/2024 16:25

""they can get it when they want, without waiting for me to ask."

But they aren't waiting for you to ask.

Some builders say no, not to be polite, but because it's more professional not to get involved in taking tea and biscuits from your client.

Because relationships can be sour later on. That's why they refuse.

When they come in and do a shite job and then you feel like you know them and can't say 'oi here Jimmy you can't leave that like that!'

I wouldn't think a drink and a biscuit would make me feel like I know them tbh. I don't chat and stay out of the way!

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Sunnyandsilly · 10/06/2024 16:28

Seaweed42 · 10/06/2024 16:13

I wouldn't offer them a thing to be honest. Not in this day and age.

A man wouldn't do that, put out food for builders.

It's buying into that whole I'm a woman so I'm a servant of men and must accommodate their needs. That's just my opinion.

They can drive their van around to the shop.
If they want to use your loo that's ok but it ends there.
They won't be expecting anything and they'll have brought their own food.

If they were a bunch of friends doing a job that's fine but you are paying them for a service.
They'll be charging you an arm and a bloody leg.

My husband does that. Sorry I should have said when I said I pop out, I meant we do, I thought it went without saying. Of course my husband offers them a coffee, he’s not some throw back, and he will also offer a biscuit.

it’s nothing to do with our gender, give over. It’s basic manners.

Original poster

ThiswillDoItsfine · 10/06/2024 16:28

CJ0374 · 10/06/2024 15:39

We've just spent 2yrs renovating. Some builders were here for weeks, other trades just a day or 2. Some tips:

Get sugar cubes. Less messy and less likely to get ants after the tea table is packed up
Add a rubbish bag or 3. I found wrappers pushed into scaffolding poles, hidden in by plant pots and cans pushed between rocks!
Most appreciated some biscuits, but some didn't eat cake or sweet things at all
2 Romanian men clearing the garden, took the entire biscuit packet. It was unopened, but I didn't expect them to take the whole pack home!
Put down flattened, large cardboard boxes to protect your floor to the bathroom
On very hot days, I left out an ice box with some cool drinks/water in, and sometimes offered ice lollies

For the entire 2 years, majority of work people went to the local shops to get lunch and presumably used the loos there. I only had 1 issue with the toilet, from a man that was just there for the day. He left the worse poonami I've ever seen which somehow exploded upwards, leaving shite all UNDER the toilet seat and around the bowl. No attempt to clear any of it off either 😡

Jesus, I won't show dh your comment on the poonami toilet, it'll add fuel! That's grim, how ignorant of him.
I was just going to put a sweetex dispenser out? If they're too fussy they need to bring their own I suppose. I like the idea of the disposable cups because the poor men last time were so scared they would drop the mugs, they're better for outdoors, and saves me washing up!

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Seaweed42 · 10/06/2024 16:25

""they can get it when they want, without waiting for me to ask."

But they aren't waiting for you to ask.

Some builders say no, not to be polite, but because it's more professional not to get involved in taking tea and biscuits from your client.

Because relationships can be sour later on. That's why they refuse.

When they come in and do a shite job and then you feel like you know them and can't say 'oi here Jimmy you can't leave that like that!'

Original poster

ThiswillDoItsfine · 10/06/2024 16:18

I need to ask as well is there such a thing as biscuit etiquette? 😂
Dh is saying we have to get branded, or it looks cheap? I actually buy in and prefer the mister biscuits/Mars bars/their twix version etc from lidl, It is what we have in for the dcs. We just like the taste of them better. Do I need to get branded?

Honestly dh is confusing me no end atm! He doesn't want to do snacks now he will, but it has to be brands, wtaf 😩 He still maintains they aren't needed, but if we do , than brands.

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Original poster

ThiswillDoItsfine · 10/06/2024 16:15

jolota · 10/06/2024 15:48

Interestingly, the last time we had tradespeople in, for about a week doing the garden & fencing in the heatwave last summer - even though I offered hot & cold drinks and had a selection of biscuits available, they refused everything every time, bought all their own supplies including huge water bottles etc. Even offered them just ice/cups and they said no thanks they were fine!
I would feel rude not to offer anything though, so did every day anyway.

Exactly, it is my nature, I have to offer drink and biscuits at least. I find putting the snacks out is easier, as some say no to be polite. I find some workmen bring their own, as they don't know if they'll be offered anything or not, and have their own preferences on what they eat/drink. I always do drinks and biscuits though.

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Seaweed42 · 10/06/2024 16:13

I wouldn't offer them a thing to be honest. Not in this day and age.

A man wouldn't do that, put out food for builders.

It's buying into that whole I'm a woman so I'm a servant of men and must accommodate their needs. That's just my opinion.

They can drive their van around to the shop.
If they want to use your loo that's ok but it ends there.
They won't be expecting anything and they'll have brought their own food.

If they were a bunch of friends doing a job that's fine but you are paying them for a service.
They'll be charging you an arm and a bloody leg.

Original poster

ThiswillDoItsfine · 10/06/2024 16:09

Mossyroller · 10/06/2024 16:04

I have just done a cream tea, ice creams and cold drinks for my builders. Over winter they had hot drinks, biscuits, cakes, bacon butties etc. They’re doing a fabulous job and they’re lovely lads; I have genuinely grown fond of them and will almost miss them when they finally finish. It’s just good hosting no?

If you have the time, and feel it is needed. I supposed it depends on the job as well, time they're there. I won't be chatting, I have things to get on with, just as I'm sure they want the job done quickly so they can get away home! If I was a tradesman I would hate somebody talking all of the time!

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Mossyroller · 10/06/2024 16:04

I have just done a cream tea, ice creams and cold drinks for my builders. Over winter they had hot drinks, biscuits, cakes, bacon butties etc. They’re doing a fabulous job and they’re lovely lads; I have genuinely grown fond of them and will almost miss them when they finally finish. It’s just good hosting no?

ClawdeenWolf · 10/06/2024 16:04

I always make a cup of tea at the bare minimum and if I'm feeling flush, I'll offer them a bacon sandwich. Some take me up of it, some don't. DCs dad was a tradie and the amount of people who will offer nothing on even the hottest/coldest days is a bit sad.

Original poster

ThiswillDoItsfine · 10/06/2024 16:04

Badassnameforadojo · 10/06/2024 15:51

I grew up in a a farming family, and anytime we had work done with tradespeople coming out, they got a full feed. So I do the same. I have rolls and sausage and bacon ready for them coming in the morning and usuall a stew or roast chicken or something for lunch. They get a kettle, tea and coffee and a cake out whenever they want. But this was totally normal when I was growing up; my dad always made sure they were fed and watered.

That's very nice of you, but what if they don't eat red red meat or have other dietary requirements? They might feel obliged to eat it when you have gone to such trouble before they have arrived. I believe in a more relaxed approach, as I feel although this is kind, it is a bit too much the other way. I don't think most ppl would have the time for all of this either, esp if it's for a team of workers! I couldn't imagine sitting around the table like this they're not family, and are strangers!

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Sunnyandsilly · 10/06/2024 16:03

Badassnameforadojo · 10/06/2024 16:00

My dad did it. That’s how he treated people working on our home. So I do it too. Is that ok?

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Sure, I mean if you want to make folks bacon rolls and stew crack on.

Badassnameforadojo · 10/06/2024 16:00

Sunnyandsilly · 10/06/2024 15:59

Can’t believe folks are saying cook them meals. Who does that!

op. I buy disposable cups from Amazon, I do take teas and coffees out, usually 3 times a day, morning, lunch, mid afternoon. I ask only for the first one what they want, then rest I just do it when I have a moment, as I know what they take.

i do sometimes take biscuits but they never go down as well as they used to, most of the blokes are trying not to eat crap these days,

My dad did it. That’s how he treated people working on our home. So I do it too. Is that ok?

tuvamoodyson · 10/06/2024 16:00

DogInATent · 10/06/2024 13:56

I bet they love charging you $&%$ tax on your bill though.

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Do cafe’s allow workmen to traipse in/out simply to use their toilet, when they’re working in a house up the road?

henlake7 · 10/06/2024 16:00

Ive had a few workman round lately and I always leave a kettle and tray with tea, coffee, etc and biscuits out. Also let them know where the loo is.
Most of them never bothered with any of it and went for breaks in their van!
Still, you have to offer dont you?

Sunnyandsilly · 10/06/2024 15:59

Can’t believe folks are saying cook them meals. Who does that!

op. I buy disposable cups from Amazon, I do take teas and coffees out, usually 3 times a day, morning, lunch, mid afternoon. I ask only for the first one what they want, then rest I just do it when I have a moment, as I know what they take.

i do sometimes take biscuits but they never go down as well as they used to, most of the blokes are trying not to eat crap these days,

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 10/06/2024 15:59

PossumintheHouse · 10/06/2024 14:36

If they're starting early, a mid-morning sausage or bacon sarnie or tea and toast would be a decent gesture. They'll be working intensively by the sounds and it never hurts to keep good tradesmen on side. If it's sweltering I'd also have some ice lollies in the freezer. On their last day I'd probably offer some cakes in the afternoon. Your husband sounds as tight as a duck's.

The ice lollies are a nice occasional idea and Lidl and Aldi do great own make ones.

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 10/06/2024 15:56

Tea/coffee/water and biscuits is basic manners and when I’ve had work done it’s what I’ve offered. A table with flask is fine too.

Badassnameforadojo · 10/06/2024 15:51

I grew up in a a farming family, and anytime we had work done with tradespeople coming out, they got a full feed. So I do the same. I have rolls and sausage and bacon ready for them coming in the morning and usuall a stew or roast chicken or something for lunch. They get a kettle, tea and coffee and a cake out whenever they want. But this was totally normal when I was growing up; my dad always made sure they were fed and watered.

Badburyrings · 10/06/2024 15:51

ThiswillDoItsfine · 10/06/2024 13:49

@LlynTegid we thankfully have a downstairs toilet, as long as tjey take boots off they can use this. DH is saying they'll have a bottle in their van if they need a wee, and they will be driving off for breaks and can go in supermarket around corner. 😩

Your husband sounds like a complete tool.