Dating short men

Who said it would be 'more of a stuggle'?

If you're looking for someone with the exact same opinions and beliefs on every topic you'll also struggle. If you need someone to be a perfect person, you'll struggle. What is your point?

With any specific and rigid preference - Finding that person is hard, and they may not fancy you anyway.

Why is it more of a struggle to find someone with every specific height and looks than to find someone with very specific personality traits or very specific political views or very specific interests or a very specific sense of humour or very specific culinary preferences?

This thread actually made me think of one short man I worked with, he was much shorter than average, I'd say around 5ft 1. I don't know if his height had anything to do with it, maybe insecurity or maybe just a horrible person regardless, but he was vile in the truest sense of the word. Berated people in front of clients, along the lines of "oh I'm not surprised Jane needs help, you can't cure stupid!", called on people like they were dogs, clicking his fingers and yelling "come on Steve, thaaaat's it, come here!"... Awful bully of a man, yet surprisingly had more than one affair at work without his partner catching on. I honestly don't know how he avoided being sacked.

Ah ok!

@Hateam is a man so i was wondering whether he was speaking from personal experience of being one of the “good” ones

what’s your basis for this out of interest?

Anecdotes and personal experience, probably, same as anything else written on here.

Most of us develop more realistic expectations with regard to looks over time, and preferences change.

Anyone with height and looks requirements that are very specific - you're going to struggle finding someone (who also likes you back!)

So long as he is confident in his height and himself. Some short men can be very unkind in my entirely biased opinion.

It's fine if you aren't attracted to short men, of course it is! I agree with not telling him the exact reason though, just that you don't see it working out, or similar.
Regardless of what others may think, I don't find short men attractive. Doesn't mean I would go for any random man taller than me (I didn't with DP), but I really wouldn't fancy towering over a man of around 5ft 4!

what’s your basis for this out of interest?

Well, I wouldn’t date a fat man either.

This happens to women all the time!!!
Dating is not an equal opportunities activity!

Same, very few men over 6’2 are in proportion, I’m not into the Peter crouch thing

It does. But it’s vital that it’s there at the start.

If there were a thread asking, “AIBU to consider cancelling my wedding to a kind, intelligent, generous, attentive, empathic, devoted man, just because I don’t really fancy him very much?” I suspect the YANBU response would be close to 100%.

Have to add I do like shorter men with a stockier build not into skinny men at all!

I’m one of those rare women that prefer shorter men. I’m only 5ft 4 and prefer men my height or slightly taller.
I find really tall men intimidating and I don’t want to have to strain my neck every time I reach up for a kiss!

If he's too short for your liking, walk past him and try for a taller guy. If you can't find one and still want to date, then consider dropping your bar and including shorter guys in the group you'd consider. How picky you can be depends a great deal on how much you want a partner and how much you offer yourself.

I’m 5ft 2 and DH 5ft 7. I prefer shorter stockier men, I don’t like feeling loomed over!

I have had three serious relationships in my life. I’m 5ft 4 they were 5’10, 5’6 and 6’1.

The 5’10 proved to be a massive dickhead, the other two were both great and both husband material and I mean really good. Who is lucky enough to meet one let alone two in a lifetime. Unfortunatley religious and cultural differences meant the shorter guys family kicked off, mine were not exactly pleased, we could have maybe got through it, he thought with children his parents would have come round but why complicate life, this was almost 30 years ago.Been married to 6’1 for 25 years.

Have you examined why you want to feel 'small' next to a partner?

Nothing at all wrong with this. You fall for a person based on what they're like as a person, height is irrelevant. I have been married to a very tall man (almost 30cm taller than me) for most of my adult life. While I like and love him very much for his personality, I've often thought that if I could change one thing about him he wouldn't be quite so tall, and my hypothetical ideal partner would be close to my own height. This would be purely for practical reasons as I don't think being either tall or short is unattractive in itself. But I'd never reject him simply because he was so ridiculously tall. I'm about average height for a woman which would be shortish for a man, but that wouldn't bother me at all.

@CheekyHobson add in a few saying how their lovely partner is skinny but completely theoretically they wouldn't mind if he was fat.

Ah height discussions.

Op hasn't done this her part, but there have been a few "I only date men over 6'" like clockwork as always.

I'm a 5'11 (and a half) woman in an all male team, always the tall girl throughout life. Not one of the 11 men I work with are taller than me, and this is in London. Your 6'2 DH is not 6'.

I've learnt height isn't important quite early. Taller men seemed to be very insecure about being seen with a woman their height or slightly taller. Give me a medium/shorter man with confidence who doesn't give a flying fuck any day - partner of 5 years is 5'8.

I'd go on a second date if you liked him. It's too early to tell if you will find him attractive. Some people we are instantly physically attracted to then turned off by personalities. Some, their character is what makes them sexy.

Don't force yourself to pretend it doesn't matter if it does, but do find out whether you like him so much it stops being a feature that bothers you.

I'm 5'8 and have dated guys my height or 1-2 inches shorter but I'm attracted to fit men and have dated a few men into combat sports so there's no issue of feeling protected there. I think it's silly and shallow to care so much about height, especially when you're so short as it's not something a man can change and would work on why you feel the need to have a taller man when it's turned into social capital as of late. Then again you're into what you're into, but you will lose out on alot of good men this way.

Also, the tallest man I dated was a total wuss and not very nice - his height was a big part of his personality which I found offputting. My brother is 6'6 and is also a big wuss, as far as feeling protected goes 😂

What each of us is attracted to differs. I sense he isn't right for you. He's too keen, and that has nothing to do height.