Dating short men

They do! Which is why ‘body shaming’ is 90% related to women - it’s much less acceptable to tease a woman for how she looks than a man. At work a very overweight and plain woman regularly jibes at the bald men, teasing them for losing hair. One of them said to me ‘Can you even imagine what would happen if I teased her back for being fat?’ He had a point.

Well no, it's not really. Unless those women are going on to male dominated sites and telling the men on there they are shallow and superficial for not dating those women. Women complaining to other women for solidarity and a cheer up when men reject them for their appearance isn't the same as telling men off and trying to shame them into giving women they don't fancy a chance. I mean, no one but a fool would try that with men, would they? They'd be laughed off the page.

I’ve come across a few tall men who were smug, arrogant and conceited, tbh. Height is not a reliable indicator of personality.

Men in general have a tendency to be aggressive, it’s just that if a man is short it’s called “short man syndrome” and if a man is tall it’s called “he’s a jerk”.

But it’s the same as women complaining men won’t date them as they’re short and fat. ‘He’s not worth you anyway babe’ etc

Indeed. Yet the frequency with which these threads pop up that invariably turn to haranguing women who only like tall men, calling them superficial and shallow and telling them to give short men a chance, suggests that some people think they should.
If some women won't date short men, all that means is that short men will not be able to date those particular women. Which is too bad. Very few of us get our pick of every single person we may be attracted to, and clearly there are other women who don't mind their height.
But they doesn't seem enough for them and their advocates who persist in complaining about the women who refuse them.

I have never dated, but have met some delightful 'short' men. Go for it!

I'm afraid I'm always wary of 'little man' syndrome OP. Little men often seem to feel the need to prove how macho they are, and that just because they're small, they're no less manly, so can prove aggressive in some situations. I'm afraid I'd throw this particular small fry back in the pond.

PP said that she didn't believe the statement 'you can't help who you're attracted to' was strictly true and gave her reasons, that who we are attracted to may be based in prejudice.
My comment meant well, yes, maybe so, but imo we shouldn't need to feel we have to try to overcome 'prejudice' where dating is concerned. As others have said, it's not an equal opportunities activity, no one has the right to be considered by us as a partner, so we can continue to reject short men if we like, without feeling we are doing something wrong or challenge ourselves on who we're attracted to. (Which I think is probably way more words than the original point was worth, so if you've stuck with it this far, thank you for your patience!)

It’s fine to not be attracted to anyone for any reason, but tbh it’s likely why so many people are single (and unhappy about that)

Who said short men should have the pick of any woman they want? Nobody is entitled to that.

by “help who you’re attracted to”

do you mean try to override what you’re instinctually attracted to ie force it?

Because even with correct grammar, i still think most people would look quizzically at you if you said this!

Its not my grammatical finest hour, I grant you. But I'm sure you know what I mean in context of the post I'm responding to. We can allegedly help who we're attracted to if we try, but why should we bother to try?

Then perhaps it's better to say "we don't need to try to help who we're attracted to"

If someone did say that… i think they’d get rather quizzical looks, as it makes no sense!

Then perhaps it's better to say "we don't need to try to help who we're attracted to" (just so short men can have their pick of any woman they want and not just be restricted to the millions of women who already don't mind short men.)

“You can’t help what you’re attracted to” is often trotted out on these threads. I don’t think that is wholly true. Some of what we do or don’t find attractive is driven by prejudice. The idea that certain traits are manly and some less than manly. Or fear of what your friends will think if you date, say, a ginger or someone shorter than you.

If you limit your dating pool to men over say 6 foot 2 then you are probably reducing the potential candidates by a factor of 10.

Then you need to understand that since height is seen as a very desirable trait you will be in competition with a lot of other women for that much reduced pool.

So in short (to pardon the pun), you had better be something special yourself in order to secure one of that reduced pool.

Since that pool knows they are seen as relatively desirable, they also get to play the field if they wish. Which is not seen by many women as a desirable trait (especially if that field playing doesn't involve picking them for a long term relationship).

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. In this particular case, the prize is the ability to claim "OLD is rubbish" and "there are no good men out there" (that match up with my highly exclusive requirements).

I think a large number of women do not realise how picking such options (exclusive height requirements) reduces their probability of finding a successful relationship.

Of course people are allowed to choose whatever criteria they want in picking a partner. Just don't be surprised when probability and statistics gives you a hard no in response to your chances of success.

I’m 5’3. My last BF was about my height (and about as wide as he was high!)

Current BF is 6’2 and skinny as a rake. We look ridiculous together

Last long term DP was 5’9 and chunky, like me.

i honestly don’t get why anyone thinks height or body shape is so important. It’s much more important to me that someone is decent, caring, thoughtful and honest. Physical attributes are just so unimportant, especially if you like their face and there’s some chemistry there.

My friend had a great date, spent the whole night laughing and had so much in common with this one guy, including having a property in another country where he ran a business identical to one she’d love to run. But he was shorter than her so she ‘got the ick’ and didn’t see him again. Such a waste of potential.

ignore me @Hateam it is absolutely none of my business

she can’t read a few posts?

I suppose what you need to ask is: Do you fancy him. If yes then it’s no problem. If no, well it’s probably not a keeper. Height is a bit of a loaded subject - we don’t apply the same pressure to hair colour etc. Let go of the guilt etc and just ask yourself if you fancy him or not!!

See, that's really interesting. Speaking as a woman who's dated women exclusively, and gets to have weirdly frank conversations with men without the burden of sexual overtones, I'd say the opposite. The majority of women I've encountered both online and in real life are cravenly selfish asshats with a sense of entitlement way past their ability to justify it, whereas most men just want an easy life and are willing to give what's necessary to look after their family.

Obviously, that's not a true assessment either, and the truth probably lies somewhere in between.

The difference is that a lot of men are willing to concede that there are an uncomfortable number of guys who aren't the kind you'd want to spend any time with at all, much less the rest of your life. I don't understand why more women aren't willing to admit the same.

Not really possible st the moment due to her health.

i bet your wife would have a real chuckle @Hateam if you showed her all your posts on what “what advice would 40 plus year old women give younger women”.

Go on… I dare you!

I think I've made some significant generalisations.

Not all decent men are married by 30.

I agree that nobody should settle.

There are more decent women around than men. Lots of men are selfish. This is often not apparent until after children are born when domestic tasks are slowly shifting to the woman's list whilst golf and football carry on.