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Original poster

Why do I get nervous around managers?

33 replies

OctanuTs · 09/06/2024 16:31

All my life I’ve been nervous around my mangers. Doesn’t matter if they are male or female my reaction is the same. I feel embarrassed how I act. I get so nervous and tongue tied. I spent all weekend going over conversations and feeling embarrassed and analysing what I’ve said anyone else feel like this or have any advice? I work in schools for context.

OP posts:
DistinguishedSocialCommentator · 09/06/2024 16:48

HarridansOfUsAll · 09/06/2024 16:34

I think more information needed. Are you a dreadful employee, given to continual lateness or petty pilfering or something? So your conversations with managers are usually about a disciplinary or being fired? Otherwise this seems quite odd.

A cruel and uncalled for post!!

OP - look at it like this - they are only human like you and they are no better, nor worse than you. Yes, show them respect if they deserve it but they have a role, you have a role and you ALL work for someone. You have every right to be there as they do

They don't keep you on because they like you, they keep you on as you do a damn good job

Original poster
OctanuTs · 09/06/2024 16:44

I think it comes from childhood where I was told I wasn’t good enough but it shouldn’t be affecting me still should it?

OP posts:
HarridansOfUsAll · 09/06/2024 16:39

OctanuTs · 09/06/2024 16:38

I’m very hard working and been told lots of times I’m “conscientious”. I’ve had amazing references from every job. I do supply so I’m going from school to school. I probably do at the most 2 teens in a school then move on. I have got offered work in every school I go to and agencies always comment “they want you back”. I get pre-booked quite often.

I don’t know what it is maybe a confidence thing.

Why, though, if every authority figure in your professional life has given you 100% positive feedback, references etc.?

Original poster
OctanuTs · 09/06/2024 16:39

@MishkaNorushka sounds very familiar! I had same childhood.

OP posts:
Original poster
OctanuTs · 09/06/2024 16:38

I’m very hard working and been told lots of times I’m “conscientious”. I’ve had amazing references from every job. I do supply so I’m going from school to school. I probably do at the most 2 teens in a school then move on. I have got offered work in every school I go to and agencies always comment “they want you back”. I get pre-booked quite often.

I don’t know what it is maybe a confidence thing.

OP posts:
MishkaNorushka · 09/06/2024 16:37

I am the same and mine stems from oppressive childhood, domineering mother and despot primary school teacher.

Manager myself, I am overcompensating to my direct reports by being nice, worried sometimes I am being a pushover. But also still get clammy around anyone senior. Does this sound familiar?

EatCrow · 09/06/2024 16:35

Is it a power thing?

HarridansOfUsAll · 09/06/2024 16:34

I think more information needed. Are you a dreadful employee, given to continual lateness or petty pilfering or something? So your conversations with managers are usually about a disciplinary or being fired? Otherwise this seems quite odd.

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