Just want to go home

We took our 15 month old to Thailand many years ago. Such a mistake! 😂 Zero percent restful. It was routine out the window, none of the usual safety stuff or toys and me and DH tag teaming all day long around the pool. Collapsing into bed at 7:30 with DS sleeping like a starfish between us as he hated the travel cot 🤦🏼‍♀️

We then waited till he was 3.5 years to go skiing, which was great at that age. Our youngest was 4 (eldest 5) before we all went on a sun holiday. A lot more fun at that age.

Probably just don’t go on holiday until they are more manageable. I didn’t go when my kids were little. It’s just work and not a holiday.

We used to holiday in the UK when our daughter was a toddler. We went to a place called Crieff Hydro, which was great for kids of all ages. That said, it was still stressful! Busy hotel, in a new unfamiliar bed - it's all quite unsettling for them when they're young.

One of our holidays to Crieff was hell from start to finish, when our daughter was around 3. It was like she'd been possessed the entire trip! Her behaviour was horrific. She slept/dozed the whole journey home, when she woke up at home it was like a switch flip, back to her normal jolly self 😂

If nothing else @holly201 the trip will make you appreciate your home comforts on a whole new level - so hang on to that thought!

I remember my sister calling me in tears - she and her husband drove 7 hours so their girls could see Tobermory because they were obsessed with Balamory, and they got there, the kids weren’t interested and just wanted to see “proper” balamory on the telly, so much of the time was spent in a shit B&B in the rain watching ceebeebies. Her advice was don’t go away until they’re old enough to order from a menu themselves and only go to places where daytime drinking is acceptable.

@TheBirdintheCave totally! We've never had a ton of money (relatively speaking) so our holidays abroad are more 'budget' than some of what's suggested here, but they've all been great!

My kids are not angels and I don't expect it of them. But spending time together seeing new sights, eating (hopefully) nice food, no work, no chores, better or at least different weather, hearing a different language, different scenery, watching your kids explore new situations... This is all good stuff in my book! I love holidays. We expect some tricky bits because that is life, but it's still always fun.

It is extremely hot in Greece currently. July temps in early june. Will hit 43 on wednesday, so trying to relax around a busy shared pool with a 1 year old is never going to be enjoyable.

No more words of wisdom or advice that hasn't been mentioned upthread OP. I live in Greece and used to escape with mine by flying back to UK in summer holidays, where rain and queues would have me checking for flights back home by day 3 😂

I have great memories now and we are going next month with a full itinerary planned. But it was always so challenging when they were little. Holidaying with babies and very young children isn't much fun for many. We try with all our optimism but invariably being away from home and routine is often a lot of upheaval, and really trying and so effing tiring.

I found from aged 5 it became much easier (hang in there!!) and by aged 8 we could traipse all over on city breaks etc. Then you hit the teens and another set of challenges arise... 🙄

Do complain about the sunbeds situation though. And if finances can stretch whenever you feel ready for a next time, rent a villa. Shared pools like the one you are describing is hell.

Holidaying with kids isn't a holiday, I always said it was just a change of scenery! Maybe don't go somewhere so hot next time - and take the IL's!!

@ThatTimeIKnewFamousPeople Right?? I don't understand the negativity towards holidays with kids here 🤷🏻‍♀️ I see the same phrase on a lot of threads 'holidays with kids aren't a holiday' and find it so irritating 😂 It's such a blanket statement when everyone's lived experience is different. It really is a subjective thing. Just because one person had a hard time with their kids on holiday doesn't mean everyone will.

I can only empathize and feel your pain @holly201 !

Dream: they will be entertained and well behaved whilst travelling
Reality: they will only be quiet when put in front of a screen and comment loudly on other travellers to your embaraasment. They will require zillions of wee stops including when they just went 5 minutes ago because they didn't realise they needed a poo as well.

Dream: they will enjoy trying new foods and culture
Reality: even if they enjoy trying new things at home they will steadfast refuse them on holiday and be highly suspicious of anything which is not chips or rice despite much cajoling.

Dream:They will enjoy the beach
Reality: they will get sand in every orifice, and scream like a snot ridden sand banshee

Dream: they will love the heat and being able to wear less clothes
Reality: they will moan and complain and become lethargic in heat and only be happy in air conditioned bliss. Can't really blame them as we Brits aren't really used to proper heat!

Dream: They will enjoy being allowed to stay up later with the grow ups and get used to the new time zone
Reality: they will be fixed on their existing routine and you will find yourself staying at the ceiling in the dark at 5pm whilst other holiday makers enjoy the sun.

Dream: they will enjoy sightseeing and learning about new culture and trying out the language
Reality: they will get bored sightseeing and their 'highlights' will be things they weren't supposed to see or non events such as finding a packet of crisps they recognise in a local shop. They will not appreciate the finer things.

I could go on...

Save yourself the trouble next time and do a stay cation or leave the kids at home!

Snap @TheBirdintheCave

I must be a rarity - I have loved all the holidays with my kids, even the toddlers. I think it's because we don't do poolside ai holidays tho. If you have a rental car you have an air-conditioned nap option. And if one 'option' doesn't work (pool is boring, beach is sandy, whatever) you can switch it up the next day. City breaks are good for this too.

My eldest is 22 and my youngest is primary school aged. I've holidayed abroad nearly every year I've been a mum. It doesn't have to be miserable, I love it!

No pretending here.

Honestly a lot of how you view holidays post kids is dependent on how you holidayed pre kids.

We are not people who find sitting by a pool relaxing. Our holidays were always go go go city breaks in apartments or apart-hotels (we still eat our for every meal bar breakfast) and we just carried on going once our son was born.

We've only really had to make adjustments from two onwards (as son became more of a person and less of an accessory 😂) and add in more child friendly museums, a trip to a park or a day or two at a beach.

So yeah, if your idea of a holiday pre kids was cocktails and reading on a sun lounger, then sure, it would be very hard to achieve that post kids without help but city breaks post kids are definitely achievable to a similar standard.

I love holidaying with my son and this year we get to take his baby sister with us too 🥰

Is there a shaded kids pool? When mine were that age me and DH would just take turns sitting at the edge of the kids pool during the day and letting them splash then we'd put them in the pram for a walk and nap around lunchtime- then lunch and indoors for a bit during the midday heat- that seemed to work quick well.
I personally don't like the beach but i've seen people put a little paddling pool beside the sunbeds in teh shade and then they can play in the sand beside but shaded.

Poor you. Sounds awful.

I don’t agree that holidays abroad are not worth it with babies and toddlers. You just have to think carefully about the type.

We always took ours away from when they were under a year, our eldest’s first flight was to Miami when he was 8 months. We have only done UK breaks with them 2 or 3 times (and if the weather’s shite, they can be very boring), but trips abroad dozens and always long flights.

But we ALWAYS booked a villa or a house. Hotels are too restrictive imo. I think it’s so much easier when you have a home from home and your own pool to wear them out in. In the evenings, we could sit outside and grill then use the hot tub while they were happily zonked out in a bedroom.

I've had similar experiences OP. We all get so sick of the gloom in this country that we rush to book holidays in the hottest, sunniest places we can find. But we forget how horrendous the heat can be. I remember a holiday in Spain where it remained in the mid-30s the entire time we were there. By the end, I was almost insane. I yearned for cold and drizzle!

It does get easier. I had one holiday with an 11m that I remember being quite stressful. It got easier generally after that and this year was lovely with a 5 and 7yo with the latter being even easier than the younger one. Both were happy in kids club for a few hours every day.

You do have to be quite careful about the quality of accommodation. There’s no point going if It’s going to be harder than at home. I’ve got to the point where I’d rather have a luxury holiday every few years rather than something a bit rubbish every year.

When ours were really small we didn't take them abroad ever. Just maybe a 4/5 day trip to a cottage in Norfolk and we would go on outings from there. (Dino Land, BeWilderWood, the little steam train etc).

When they were a little older (up to about 11) we went on many Euro / Key Camp holidays to France. One place in Picardy had a fishing lake and my 3 boys and husband would fish nearly all day and i kept a spreadsheet of who caught what. Sounds dull but i say on the veranda of our plastic house and sunbathed and or read and dished out ice lollies. Simple fun.

Maybe i got lucky but i didn't have to pretend, our holidays were never hell, she adapted to new time zones and new temperatures very well, loved new foods, she's 7 now and LOVES her holidays and still trying loads of new foods.
Sorry you've had a tough time OP.

I feel your pain! It's a big adjustment for all and the heat creates a massive amount to deal with with a young one.

Just put it down to experience and go on a lovely UK holiday another time. I hate the flying now and just dream about UK holidays.

I hear you, op. We took eldest dc away when he was 2 on a holiday that was arranged precovid and kept getting delayed so he wasn't even born when we booked it. It was absolute hell. Even with my family there as help. DH and I agreed no more until our kids are older. We're now doing local Eurocamp holidays with a drive shorter than 4 hours..

This is the exact reason I never took my kids abroad when they were younger, I was waiting until they were a bit older and the plan was to go a few years ago however I then had an unplanned pregnancy the year we were planning to go and never went. Now my little one is almost 2 and we have booked Spain for Aug, I'm absolutely dreading it but don't want to leave it another few years and my two older daughters miss out on that fun 😔 I know it won't be a holiday but I'm going to try and make it as fun for my older girls as I can while dad deals with the toddler 🤣🤣

You've done the hard bit, which is realising that expectations were probably a bit off base.

I love taking my children anywhere and everywhere. Life isn't a doddle at home with 3 under 4 so it's not really put me off the added challenge of travel because I kind of figure... At least I get to do these extra things. But please don't mistake that for anything other than radical acceptance lol. Lots of things go wrong and the daily grind comes along for the ride.

Really hope that you enjoy the rest of your holiday. It's new to you all and the advice of many pp's is solid.
Hope you make some amazing memories, even if some of it tests your sanity.

This sounds like a holiday we had when DC1 was about 15 months. OMG. I love travelling, and we had some great holidays when he was a baby, but that one was the only holiday when I was seriously looking for flights to come back early.

He wouldn't sleep. He wouldn't eat. Only whining, constantly whining. All he wanted to was toddle around, but he was not stable enough to do it independently, and hotel consisted mostly of stairs. So one of us could sit and quickly eat, while the other had to hold DS' hand and walk around with him.
Beach? Ha. He HATED sand with passion. Only beach he liked was the pebbly one, where he proceeded to stuff all the pebbles in his mouth. Then whined some more when I removed them.

It will get better though. And I agree, for next trips, try a child-centered hotel, not just children allowed one. Kinderhotels in Austria for example are brilliant.

Oh bless you, deep breaths. I think the first holiday abroad with a small child really wakes you up to the BIG CHANGE life has undergone. No more sunlounger/cocktail/good book, no nice dinners out (replaced by mad sprint round the buffet to eat in shifts), no more lazy lie ins - i think in some ways we expect daily life to be a grind but holidays to be different and have maintained their relaxation magic, but it is actually harder caring for a toddler abroad and it's just same (literal) sh*t/different place. Try and find the good bits, maybe she loves the pool or loves the sand (once you find it, do it on repeat!). Try and split off if you're with other couples, can the dads take the kids for a nap and the mums go for a drink or the spa for a couple of hours to breath out?
I'd suggest center parcs for this age, the pool is perfect, you know exactly what you're getting, everyone has their own bedroom and there's great food for kids.
There's light at the end of the tunnel (unless you go for baby two). We had an awesome holiday at ages 6 and 4, covid had just finished, we went to Greece AI, they loved the beach and were swimmers by then so I genuinely could relax with a book. I read three novels, I went to the spa when they did waterparks with dad, we ate OUT and they ATE GREEK FOOD, everyone will sleep ok by then too and we could all do the slides at the little waterpark and some lovely historic day trips. My hubbie and I both just sat on the plane home in wonder at how well it went! Now we go everywhere and it's fab. It won't last long till you get there

OP, you poor thing. I agree, it's no holiday at all. We never took DC abroad until they were about 7 or 8 and old enough to actually enjoy things being a bit different from home.

But I don't want to sound smug. Instead, we had endless overpriced UK holidays in rank, damp, decrepit cottages in Devon and Dorset and Wales, trying to stop them swallowing Monopoly board houses while the rain poured down.