DH wants to Move us all to NZ…

You can buy strawberries and raspberries all year round in Australia. Many Australians eat seasonally so was to support Australian growers and I'm one of them.

Bringing a plate is a custom, not about poverty at all. It's not one I do myself when entertaining as I do it UK-style, often having to fend off kind offers that would feck up my well-planned menu.

Bringing a plate is just an easy way of sharing the load. It's not because of cost.

Mind you, I'd estimate that frush fruit, vig, fush, meat and iggs are about 30% pricier than in the UK.

There are a lot worse places you could go, but I don't think your DH's reason will drive a well thought out decision.

NZ is an expensive place to live. I think you can move and make a good life wherever you are if you choose to. However you do need to consider the longer term impacts on your child of not having extended family around.

We lived in NZ for quite a while and ultimately departed for Australia. Economically we find it much easier in Australia and one of my children developed a significant medical condition since we moved. I am very thankful to have them cared for under the Australian medical system and wouldn't move back to NZ for this one reason alone now (barring some sort of unanticipated extreme circumstance). We have more options for treatment here, I believe. That's not to say Australia doesn't have issues of it's own, like any country, but my point is to give you some of my experience. Of course, my experience is just one and not true for everyone else.

I do love the long history of Europe, so that is something you may miss. Also, the easy access to other countries from the UK.

We thought we'd go back and visit more often than we have. We rarely have because it's so expensive.

Can you visit and get a feel for NZ to help you decide? Maybe a long term visit?

We bring dishes in the UK too. Unless it's a formal dinner party. Friends are coming for a BBQ this weekend; they are bringing the pud. They will decide what it is.

Just my observation, I should probably have said, or lucky. Kiwi dentition, outside the major towns was, in 2008, even worse than the UK. I do hope things have improved.

Perhaps he needs therapy for his anxiety first

Hahahaha. "Bring a plate is a thing that people do not because of cost. Doesn't the UK have something similar, or maybe the US "a potluck dinner". It's just a form of entertaining/ gathering. "Let's all get together for Sunday lunch. Great. Can I bring something? Sure, can you do nibbles and I'll do mains and I'll ask Cathy to bring her fabulous pavlova". It's not because they can't afford food. It's been around in Aus/NZ for decades. Some of the crap on this thread is hilarous.

You said "D) It rains even more in South Island than almost anywhere else on the planet." and then mentioned Milford Sound afterwards. Anyone reading that would take from it that the S.I. is wetter than almost anywhere else on the planet, which is very untrue.

(any Kiwi you meet with decent teeth is very well-to-do)

Another strange comment. Yes, dental care is expensive, but my friends go to the dentist regularly, as did my colleagues when I worked. Me, not so much, but I have very good teeth, and I go if I need to. None of us are "very well-to-do.

I did say Milford Sound specifically! and meant it. We had 18 inches of rain in our three days there. But yes, I have farming friends in Hawarden and have heard of their drought.

OI !!! Who's rude?

Our DS enjoyed a week in Kiwi primary school at eight. We donated the cost of local education spend to the class year group for the teacher to spend. And we did the same in the US on the same trip. As I said upthread, we spent three months there, renting a series of places to stay, at considerable expense but we were doing DH's bucket list after he survived a catastrophic health crisis. DH was at the right age to learn as much travelling as from formal school, and I have QTS so he did all the reading and writing practice anyway and his maths was learning to plan journeys by understanding airline schedules and time zones. He learned to read a map on the same trip. He even bought a tiny drawing by a famous NZ artist for the family Christmas present as a souvenir, within his allotted (£15 equivalent) budget at a museum. We returned nearly bankupt. But healthier, and we regrouped.

Typically, when most people invite you over to their house you have to "bring a plate" as the host cant afford to cater for all those that they have invited.

Oh ffs! "bring a plate" is generally reserved for a big social function. I have never been invited to someone's house and had to take my own food!

At the moment I am sitting in my heat pump heated living room and I'm toasty warm. What we don't do is heat every room in the house, normally just the living areas. I have never in my life taken an extra jumper and a pair of socks to someone's house in winter. You must know some rather odd, not to mention frugal, people!!

Point D); Specifically, the West Coast of the South island is very wet. The East Coast of the South Island is dry. I live here and it has barely rained for 6 months, we had fires over summer due to the dry conditions. The mountain range which runs up the middle of the island has an effect on the weather. Agree with your other points though!

D) It rains even more in South Island than almost anywhere else on the planet. Milford Sound doesn't blink at rain when it's measured in feet per month.

I very much doubt OP will be moving to Milford Sound to live!! As for the rest of your ridiculous statement, I live in the South Island, much of the time we are in drought conditions and farmers have irrigators or they would be pretty much restricted to sheep farming! The West Coast gets a lot of rain, the majority of people in the S.I. don't live there. Honestly, where do people get this stuff from?

Also the expensive travel thing is a bit of a red herring. If you can afford package holidays to Europe then flights home are totally doable. Again I feel like a lot of the comments here are cliches churned out without basis

Some of the comments here are inaccurate or based on nz 10 plus years ago. The dollar has become a lot stronger than pre 2008 - in my view salaries are on the whole higher here. I have certainly found that.

also be wary op. Some of the people commenting might have moved over and lived somewhere very rural and remote with miserable weather. Of course life would be shit. I would be very cautious about taking advice from a forum like this, the only way to know is to visit - trust me I have ping ponged several times.

I'm in NZ and it feels like half my work place is from the UK, I would say the biggest adjustment for some of them is how far away they are from everything else and not being able to easily travel. I have lived here all my life so being "remote" is what I know and am used to, but I can see how it would be a struggle if you're not and all your family are a long distance flight away.

As a Brit I have lived in NZ for 8 yrs, I recently left to move to Australia
I'll try and cover off some more unusual points;

Say if you earn 100k GBP in the UK and get offered $200k NZD its not the same, your pay in NZ doesn't go as far. Food is really really expensive, particularly fruit and veg. I am in the UK at the moment and food is still cheap here, in comparison.

You have to eat seasonally, you can't decide to make a pavlova and put strawberries and rasberries on as they are only available when in season in NZ and OZ, so you have to buy frozen or go without.

If you get invited to someones house in winter, you have to take an extra jumper and socks as you will likely be chilly.

Most houses have heat pumps, but they aren't that great tbh

Typically, when most people invite you over to their house you have to "bring a plate" as the host cant afford to cater for all those that they have invited.

Could you interest him in prepping instead?

A vastly cheaper option would be for your DH to turn the news off and stop doom scrolling on social media.

Cutting that out for a couple of weeks, he'll feel much better mentally.

It's difficult to compare the systems.

I've consistently heard that schools here are more relaxed.

Regarding maths, there is an acknowledged crisis and on most measures English schools outperform NZ. Regarding basic literacy, NZ appears to be best, but my observation of my kids' education is that on the humanities / arts / literature side their education has been very thin.

I've often heard it said that NZ schools tech certain topics about two years after England, though how much actually stays in English kids' heads is probably worth considering as they seem to be so bombarded.

About alleged anti-English sentiments:

This is almost entirely due to the different sense of humour. Kiwis rag each other, as a sign of affection, in a way that would be rude in English culture. Your ethnicity won't be excluded from the ragging. Also English polite self-depreciation can come across as servile / manipulative here.

there's also a reappraisal of the country's colonial background and that can be confronting if you're from the UK.

I'm English-born and I've been here for two decades and haven't ever experienced hostility directed at me because I'm English. Scotland in the 90s was way worse.

I would veto the idea

A) because I think your DH is over-reacting to his SM feeds
B) because neither of you have even visited the place, and don't seem to have done any research on anything very much that would affect any life you would have there from the cost of housing (exorbitant) to dental care (any Kiwi you meet with decent teeth is very well-to-do)
C) because NZ is not heaven on earth, though desperately beautiful. There are social issues there too.

D) It rains even more in South Island than almost anywhere else on the planet. Milford Sound doesn't blink at rain when it's measured in feet per month.

Not sure why people are so worried about “the war” we had a Cold War instead of a hot war between us and the USSR for one major reason- nuclear weapons! Mutually assured destruction! Your safe in the UK where no country would dare invade us then New Zealand who has non. Even me saying this sounds utterly nuts!!!! Also a side note on NZ- houses are very expensive there- it’s like buying a house in London, also as it’s so remote- buying things from abroad costs a fortune