Going partying with a group of strangers then back to hotel room?

I'd use your own judgement and not that of exes. I was a wild one in my 20s, a complete outrovert party girl. I'm the complete opposite in my 40s, I very rarely drink and if I can choose not to be in big groups, I do so. However it always amazes my DP how when I'm in big group situations where mingling is expected, I come across as a social butterfly, as if it's a normal daily occurrence. He on the other hand is introverted all the time.
It's not something fake, I can just enjoy group situations more, because I'm not in them a lot.

Don't judge him on unusual situations that aren't a daily or even weekly occurrence.

Do you actually mean to sound condescending and disdainful? Because that's how it's coming across, in most of your posts in this thread really but especially in this one. 'Swanning off' on holiday sounds so unpleasant and whether you mean it or not, so judgemental of other people who have kids and work commitments, but also like to have a relaxing holiday once in a while.

And re the rest of your thread, yes, YABVU. I'm like you, I'm an introvert and I love to be alone, and I would hate to socialise this way, but lots of other people enjoy it, and your boyfriend has not done a single thing wrong. Like a few PP have said, it's like you're picking away at every tiny little thing he does and says to have a go at him.

You are not compatible for many reasons so don't flog a dead horse.

Honestly OP, this is not the hill to die on.

In his shoes I'd have done the same.

Many's the time I'll befriend folks, add them to FB (whether male or female), go back to their place etc.

I'm in a 40 odd year partnership/marriage and have zero interest in anyone else.

My DH doesn't bat an eyelid.

Let it go.

And now he’s having a good time and is really happy, and that makes you feel uncomfortable. He’s not the issue here OP, it’s you. You’re begrudging him for having a good time and it’s really really strange. I feel sorry for him.

Absolutely. I love my peace and quiet and time alone. I’m very very content with my own company but equally there’s times I’m very social and love other people around me.

Theres not mutually exclusive positions. I would imagine most people even introverts have times like on holiday when they want to join in and mix with others.

He didn’t swan off on holiday, he booked a trip as he is entitled to do. The majority of people have work commitments and still go on holiday. You didn’t want to go, just leave it at that rather than comment that he swanned off.

It’s obvious that you’re borderline repulsed by this man, you find him childish and embarrassing, and you definitely don’t like him.

Break up with him when he gets back,
I don’t think discussing your disdain of him any further on this thread is going to do anything for you.

just having to see someone more than once a week has been tough…. If you're happy with own company and secure in yourself, how on earth can you feel lonely? Friends should be a bonus, not a must have.

Eek. You sound very cold OP. Just because you don’t want friends doesn’t mean he should sit alone for the week. I’m starting to understand why he went away alone - you definitely didn’t want to go with him!

I feel a bit sad for him that you find it tough to see him more than once a week. You are definitely not compatible.

I think it depends on where you choose to go. If you're travelling to a city, packed full of sight seeing or a dream destination you have always wanted to go, you're happier alone so you can see all you want to and you can keep yourself busy and where you will find many solo travellers. That's completely different to choosing a place that is full of couples and groups who are off doing things and having fun together.
Even in Greece, there are some places that are just fabulous for a solo, totally chilled holiday, whereas drive 20 mins away, you'd feel completely out of place being alone.

I don't think thats a position many people will identify with OP, I think you're fairly unique there.

I love my own company, will happily take myself off on a trip by myself, sit in the pub with a good book. I'm not great in big social situations, much prefer 1 to 1 with someone etc.

But that doesn't mean I never want to spend time with others, or have a night out with a group, or meet new people. Yes, its out of my comfort zone but I'd get proper FOMO if I was on holiday and everyone else is having fun in the bar and I'm all on my own.

You would've HATED us when I was a holiday rep in the Canaries. Whenever we found someone holidaying alone, they were invited out with us reps to bars and for dinner and it continued that way for their holiday (regardless of age) I still keep in touch with a couple of them now.

Do you realise what it's like for people in a place like Tenerife alone? They see families, couples and friends groups and it can be terribly lonely and isolating. I still remember how gutted I was for one woman in Gran Canaria, who was sobbing to me one afternoon as she didn't expect to feel so lonely.

YABVU

Gonna be honest OP you sound like an absolute controlling superior hard work nightmare.

The poor sod having a bit of fun on a solo holiday and you’re finding every excuse under the sun to slag him off. So what if he calls randoms his friends? What skin is that off your nose?

Many of us done things on holiday we probably wouldn’t do at home but what? He’s having fun stop dragging him down

Do the guy a favour. End the relationship and you can both find people who suit you better.

"Withholding information"

He doesn't have to tell you everything he does or says. He's his own person, you're in a relationship with him, not sharing a single brain.

And why does it matter if he adds some people to facebook, or decides to keep in touch with people he met on holiday?

You sound deeply controlling, and honestly I think he'd be better off without you.

OP you aren't a good match, you are very critical of him early on. There's nothing wrong with someone making friends while they're on holiday alone. Just end it when he gets back

What are you on about? Completely fine to act that way in your 40s too. Being sociable doesn’t stop once you’re no longer in your 20s…

The whole thing is weird; why didn’t you go on holiday together?

Whether or not the meeting people and partying with them is dodgy or not will depend on his personality and how trustworthy he is. You shouldn’t overreact though; maybe he’s just lonely and enjoying himself.

Up to you whether or not you think he wouldn’t do anything silly.

you sound crazy

hes better off without you

Tenerife is hardly the place you go to by yourself. What did you think he was going to do there
Dont be daft, I've been going to Tenerife by myself for 20 odd years, so does my best friend. We are both female and like our own company.