To sleep with a 23 year old?

Really that’s a very odd thought process, generally most folks think of age appropriateness and stage of life

No, most people just aren’t presented with the opportunities to shag someone much older or younger. You’re overthinking it.

I think go for it. I don’t understand why anyone else would have such strong opinions on what other, consenting adults do in their own time.

Not for me, I’m 47 and my son is nearly 23. It just seems wrong, cringy and desperate.

OP is not necessarily his mother´s age. His mother could be 60 / 18 years older than OP...

Anyhow, this would not be my cup of tea. But he is in his mid 20ies and aware of OP´s age. So these are ultimately two adults who are free to do whatever they want. They´re both free to fetishise each other´s (lack of) youth, age, appearance etc.

I personally must however admit that I occasionally can´t help but judge people in these kinds of relationships...

Really that’s a very odd thought process, generally most folks think of age appropriateness and stage of life. Do you have any limits, like if your 18 year old daughter was interested in a 70 year old bloke would you say the same? Or it is over 18 and you’ve no limits?

I honestly dont see the problem. What difference does it make as long as you are both over 18?

Why does he have to have to have a fetish just because she's in her early 40's?!

Exactly, my answer wouldn't change either.

It does abuse me greatly that the answers would be totally different if it was the other way around, and the older man would be branded a predator etc

Not from me, as I think it's insulting to any 23 year old woman to infantalise them and suggest they're unable to make rational choice with regards to their personal life.

Because of the patriarchy and our sexist society, despite the disparity in age, this is not a power imbalance.

It does abuse me greatly that the answers would be totally different if it was the other way around, and the older man would be branded a predator etc

It does happen of course. But meeting someone organically and falling in love is a different scenario to younger guys trawling dating apps with the wrong age in their profile seeking out older women for fun.

Any of us who have tried OLD know that every vaguely attractive woman over 40 is bombarded with offers of no strings sex with 20 somethings. I’m older than the OP and used to get at least one a day telling me they’re into older women. Same with all of my single friends

Zero jealousy or judging others who are happy to want no strings sex with a younger guy but just realistic about exactly what’s on offer. And managing several men of that sort of age, I’ve heard their conversations about MILF’s being up for it.

Im not interested in being a notch on the bedpost for someone young enough to be my son. If others are up for a bit of fun then go in with your eyes open and no expectations.

My flatmate was 24 when he got together with a woman in her forties, divorced, children only a few years younger than him. His mother hit the roof.
But 25 years later they're still married. He wasn't a fetishist with mummy issues, they just fell in love (she was a secretary at his work so hardly a position of power over him either).

No it isn’t creepy, it’s two consenting adults wanting some fun together. Life’s too short.

Ignore the boring pearl-clutches in their echo chambers and go for it!

In what world is 23 and 42 the same life stage? It's really not.

They're both adults, that's it.

I went out with a 22-yo when I was 26 and even then felt like we were at different life stages. A lot changes between those ages.

Let alone between age 23 and 42. Not the same stage of life at all!

So he's 23, you're both in the same "adult phase". It's not really a huge deal.

It looks different say, if he was 17 and you were late thirties. Different life stages but same age gap. V v v different.

It still wouldn't float my boat though!

Well, neither of us can prove that either way. In my opinion, there’s a lot of anger towards a woman who dares to step outside the ‘middle-aged woman’ box in terms of sexual behaviour, and I think that includes a sort of jealousy from those who’d like to do similar but feel judged/limited by societal pressure.

You said that was the ‘biggest bollocks’ though - what’s the other bollocks, if you don’t mind my asking?

You're both adults. Ignore the sex-negative rule-makers and do it.

You must be new here. He'd be called all sorts.

Wanting sex with a woman of 42 is hardly a fetish - now if he was after sex with me (69) that would be a bit yuk and I'd send him packing!

@BernardBlacksBreakfastWine I highly doubt other posters are jealous, that's the part that is the biggest bollocks.

Sorry, which bit is ‘bollocks’?

You seem to be agreeing that 40 year old women can be sexually attractive, so we’re on the same page there. Where did I say anything about me, or OP, being ‘special’?

The fact that you personally wouldn’t want to shag a 23 year-old is fine - that’s the beauty of it: you get to choose your consenting adult and OP gets to choose hers! Why so snappy?

I find it creepy with such a large age gap. His brain hasn't even full developed yet and I think he is a walking red flag wanting to have sex with someone old enough to be his mum

You obviously know what you want sex-wise, Just read your updates.
Him being younger doesn't guarantee that he will be powerful as a partner but it makes it more likely.
Suppose he is not very experienced, how do you feel about being in gentle control as a tutor to him? I would like that, I was recently the one being taught.
Great time!!