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AIBU?

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Does she owe me the money?

86 replies

Sendmeapostcard · 05/06/2024 18:19

Hi all,
A few months back me and 2 close friends decided on a theatre show, so friend 1 put the tickets on her card and was paid by friend 2 and I within a week. (Friend 1 also bringing her husband).
The week before I got tonsillitis and my daughter was also ill, so I messaged both 2 days before the event to say I was feeling ropey but messaged friend 2 privately to see if her husband wanted my ticket, no charge (as they’re our best friends, and my fault if she no longer wanted to go with friend 1 and husband). I didn’t hear back from her (turns out she was ill too)
Friend 1 didn’t know this, and for all she knew I’d sold it or gave it away (although yes they would be seated with my friend 1 and husband), but I was then told her sister was there in my place (this was during the show) and friend 2 wasn’t going as also wasn’t well.
It since turns out she gave her sister my ticket..she did send a message “I was going to give you the money for it but I don’t know what to do now”, I think because she gave it away, not told her sister she wanted money for it but she hasn’t said that directly. It was £30, not loads but still, to me it’s wasn’t hers to give away without asking me. She’s now gone quiet on our chat because I know she’s avoiding it.
Also what is bugging me is her sister is notoriously tight, and she’s got something free again (she is a whole other thread).
So, am I owed the money- should friend 1 made it clear the ticket was for sale?
Thanks if you have read this far

OP posts:
Fleamaker · 05/06/2024 18:36

You paid for that ticket, it was yours.

She should've asked you if her sister could use it.

It wasn't hers to give away, and sister should cough up the £30.

I would ask friend about sister offering money back for MY ticket.

saltinesandcoffeecups · 05/06/2024 18:36

Your description of events is confusing …

Honestly I think you need to get over it. You couldn’t use the ticket and it would appear that your friend found someone at the last minute who could use it. Job done.

Sendmeapostcard · 05/06/2024 18:36

@Trickabrick friend 1 was going with her husband. She wouldn’t have been on her own and I would never have expected her to go on her own.
I thought I’d lose the money as no one was going to buy my ticket, I didn’t say someone could give it away. Hmm

OP posts:
Trickabrick · 05/06/2024 18:34

Sounds like you hadn’t found anyone to use your ticket so it was going spare - the other option was for friend 1 to go by herself which would have been rubbish for her. I wouldn’t expect to be paid back if my friend was facing an outing by herself that I was meant to go to with her.

What did you reply when she said “I was going to give you the money for it….”? because that was the time to say “Here’s my bank details”

Sendmeapostcard · 05/06/2024 18:33

Friend 1 had had her husband going as well, she wouldn’t have been on her own.
But taking all points on board.
I do take the view of @HateMyNewJobSoMuch that it wasn’t hers to give away though. There was no “as you’re not coming, have you sold it?”. Also I think she told her sister she could have it before she even knew that friend 2 wasn’t coming so she could have bought her own husband. But I am grateful for everyone’s views.
Definitely won’t lose a friendship over it.

OP posts:
StormingNorman · 05/06/2024 18:33

She was a CF and should have asked if her sister could have the ticket.

Meadowfinch · 05/06/2024 18:32

You couldn't use the tickets and neither could your also-ill friend. They were going to waste. None of you had returned them to the box office for possible onward sale. So I can understand why friend1 offered them elsewhere.

It would be nice of her sister to offer some cash but perhaps she can't afford it. Perhaps she was offered the ticket as only going to waste - which it was. I'm slightly puzzled why you resent the use of something you didn't want to use.

nobeans · 05/06/2024 18:29

I can't understand it sorry.

You spent the money and you couldn't go so you're out of pocket. That seems fair enough.

MaybeImbad · 05/06/2024 18:26

No. You and friend 2 both pulled out (albeit because you were ill) I wouldn’t expect money in this situation for friend 1 to invite someone else to accompany her.

I would probably offer in sister’s position, and if sister offered me would probably accept half.

If you’d explicitly asked for it to sell on that’s one thing, but I think you’re being a bit unreasonable to expect it when the ticket was just going spare.

HateMyNewJobSoMuch · 05/06/2024 18:25

IMO the ticket was not hers to offer.

The fact that she did is complete CF territory and I’d be annoyed. That said, if she asked in advance I’d probably give it away for free.

Tbskejue · 05/06/2024 18:25

Hmm really she should have offered you the money but you were expecting to lose the money and wouldn’t have been able to resell so I’d leave it as it’s not worth losing a friendship over

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