To tell the next person who asks if I'm pregnant to F OFFFFFF!

I could have written your post, I get asked all the time. I'm so self conscious, constantly trying to suck my tummy in and straighten up my posture but it makes no difference, the comments keep on coming and they're so hurtful. It ruins my day every time.
I once got asked at a concert and the person was so embarrassed she bought me a drink.
I'm a member of a Facebook group called "Sewing for my non-pregnant belly". They have some great ideas for clothes that hide it. Not that we should have to hide it, but it helps me feel less self conscious when I'm wearing something that conceals it a bit.
I always try to reassure the person who asked that it's OK and that I'm not hurt (even though I am) but having read all the comments I might stop that now.

Oh I totally get this. Post kids and a c-section I've got a pregnant looking belly thatbstay even when I lose weight. Post child 2 I was back at work having lost some of the baby weight and feeling good about myself then a new member of staff (who wasn't aware of the new baby at home) asked me how long I had left. I said forever my final baby is at nursery and I'm not planning any more. I was bold and brazen in front of her and then and cried my eyes out because I had been feeling so good about how I looked. Now I'm peri meno and look more pregnant than ever and really hating it. I don't understand why people think it is OK to make any sort of comment on someone's body at all

I agree . Bringing up that you are not pregnant would make you look like you are in fact trying to conceal a pregnancy. The lady doth protest too much and all that.

Give them to all me OP!! I'm fat and pregnant and no one can tell, it's the saddest thing

A few pp have suggested telling people you're not pregnant at the beginning of the presentation, but I don't agree with that at all. It'll just draw loads of attention, and have people looking even if entirely subconsciously.

I would just have the perfect comment at the ready. Without even confirming or denying, I'd just say 'that isn't an appropriate question in this environment', and move on.

I've had it happen to me once too. I never wore the dress I was wearing again!

I had a meeting yesterday and I was putting the leftover stuff in the kitchen (milk, tea bags etc) and a man that I hadn’t seen before said ‘Aww are you the office mum? We all need an office mum’ 🙄

Love this!

I know it’s embarrassing but maybe relish in embarrassing them back. ‘I’m not pregnant’ Dead stare. Watch them fluster! Move along with the training. Make the point about not assuming / making comments about people’s bodies.

That's very rude.

The odd thing is, they don't notice when you are actually pregnant if you are on the tube going to work, and there's a shortage of seats.

I still recall being asked by an older man if I was expecting while carrying my 6 day first old baby. The look he got from his wife was actually pretty hilarious. I don’t have this problem all the time but sometimes do. It doesn’t overly bother me as I think people are just being thoughtless rather than deliberately hurtful. In fairness when I’ve been asked is times I do look pretty pregnant so I can’t blame anyone for thinking it even if I do think it’s pretty rude to say it. Even if you are pregnant you might not want to talk about it.

I was asked if I was pregnant while in a sauna. I was 60.

I would never say thst to anyone, even if I was 99% convinced they were pregnant! You just don’t! I would respond really loudly with ‘I’m not pregnant I’m just fat’ (you’re not!!) and watch them squirm!

I would have to say at the beginning before anyone asks I'm not pregnant and then no elephant in the room or uncomfortableness from you.

They should not ask, anybody with a bit of cop on, does not ask that question. Just mark them in your own head as idiots.

I'm sorry OP. I do empathise with you. My happiness is sadly linked to how I look and at the moment it's very bad. When someone asked me if I was pregnant I replied with "no I'm just fat". It ruined my evening.

I've been slim but with a pot belly all my life. I remember girls at my school when I was 7 or 8 telling me I looked pregnant, and as I got older I was told I was fat, but I was actually underweight at the time.

It's a genuine body shape that exists in women and girls, especially if you're short-waisted and naturally store weight on your abdomen. But society in general seems to want to medicalise this shape: the attitude is, if you're female and have a larger belly, it can only be one of two things: pregnancy or there is something wrong with you, something that needs correcting. As demonstrated by some of the replies on this thread.

I wish I could give you some witty, cutting retorts for the future rude people who will say this to you, but so far every time someone has told me that I must be pregnant, I've been too stunned and upset to say anything clever.

I had a cyst and cancer blood markers too. It turned out that I had a simple cyst and endometriosis (the blood marker I had can be a sign of ovarian cancer or endo). I thought I had endo so I asked the surgeon to remove any endometriosis they could find and remove during surgery which they did. I read online that you have to raise it before surgery as you have to give consent before surgery for them to operate on it. Might be something to think about?

Between carrying my fat on my belly, endo and that ovarian cyst I have had many people congratulate me or ask me when I’m due over the years. My lifetime low was the day after I had had some bad fertility test results, at a party talking to a group of people while holding a large glass of wine, and a man pointed at my belly and loudly declared ‘it seems congratulations are in order!’ Then insisted I must be pregnant when I said I wasn’t. Twice.

I for Italy not for everyone. I started doing heavy weights two years ago with a PT and my tummy stubbornly remains. It's almost worse now as my legs and arms are even more toned making my tummy more noticeably out of proportion.

Oh OP I am in the exact same boat; I get asked at least on a quarterly basis some version of "when are you due". I lost two stone before my wedding, was a very slim size 10, yet was still asked if I was pregnant.

In the past two years I've also developed mild IBS which means any sniff of stress and I bloat up like a balloon - awful when you need to stand up in front of a group.

What really kills me these days is hearing kids ask my children if I am pregnant; not commenting about women's bodies feels like a lost cause.

Gosh how hard for you.

I'd be tempted to add a preamble saying "Just out of interest, to save you and me the embarrassment later, I'm not pregnant"

Or wear different clothing.

It's not your fault, but re-educating everyone is wearing you out emotionally. 😔

id be raging. How dare they. I empathise with you as I have the same shape including stomach seems to be high up, I tend to give the look of death if I catch people looking 😂

I have the same shape figure as you. Skinny legs, no bum and a pot belly. I’ve been asked before when I’m due and to be honest, I take great pleasure in watching them squirm when I tell them I’m not pregnant. Although, right now I am pregnant with my first and no one has asked me, which is just typical.

This. Aww this is just awful. It really isn't anything to do with you. These are just awful people with zero social skills. No one should ever ask this question unless the baby is physically coming out ! Keep going. U have just been unlucky.

I can't talk for other people but for me it mattered because pregnancy was what I wanted but the reason I looked pregnant (weight gain due to meds) meant I wasn't allowed to get pregnant.
Pregnancy or lack of is very personal and steeped in a lot of emotions. As is weight and how we feel about ourselves. I knew I had gained weight and mostly around my stomach. I wished it was a baby. I wished I didn't have to take the meds. I wished I could be like all my friends and not having to make the decisions I had. The person that said it to me was just being nosy. She wanted to be in on the gossip and I was a pawn in that situation. She was mortified and I'm not going to say that I have to minimise my hurt to make her feel less uncomfortable about making me hurt

SonoBello

All sounds a bit drastic.

You're obviously young enough to look pregnant and hopefully generally cheerful enough for people to think you're pregnant.

Why does it matter if you are or not pregnant?

How does it work with people who know you're not pregnant?

If you have the appearance of being pregnant, and you're presenting .... why not make it part of your introduction?

You have the speaking point to which everyone is listening.

It could be a great ice-breaker. "Hello, thank you for being here. I'm happy to share this information. It's generated some really good conversations. Just one thing to note. Some people think my curvacious silhouhette means I'm pregnant. Thank you, those of you, for all the good wishes. I smile because I'm polite. I'm not pregant. But I'd love feedback on my presentation."