Embarrassing Doctor Stories

My dog did this! While out she got into the beetroots (rescue and previously a stray so ate anything) and started passing blood. Very expensive vet visit!

My own is went in labour with my 2nd dc, I was told to not push and to pant to try and save my previously torn vag and arse. I stuck my tongue out and panted like a dog.

Going for a smear test forgetting I had been doing a lot of pole and aerial fitness. I have a photo of my leg bruises from then!
She was horrified, convinced I was in need of referral for domestic violence and some bleeding disorder
I'm just pale, bruise easily and was spending a lot of time clambering around a metal pole

When I was 18 I had to go to hospital as I had really enlarged lymph nodes in my neck that just wouldn't go away. Off I went naively thinking they would just look at my neck area and that would be it. I had to strip down to my underwear so they could check my groin area. I was wearing really racy lingerie (early on with now DH and very much in lust stage). I was going straight to now DH house after the appointment and it had never occurred to me I'd have to take anything off at all. I remember the feeling of absolute dread and huge embarrassment standing there thinking they must think I've dressed up for this like some kind of weirdo. Obviously they were total professionals and didn't bat an eyelid but I was mortified.

Similar to this, had an appointment booked long in advance with a geneticist at the recurrent miscarriage clinic the same day we had a 20 week scan booked for a successful pregnancy. Yes we did cancel the initial appointment!

Someone I know (it wasn't me, I promise!) went to the doctor one morning in a panic. He was on new medication and has misread the dose - instead of taking it once a day, he has been taking it three times a day (which was what his other meds were) and he had been shitting very bloody stools. He was panicking that he had overdosed and something was seriously wrong.

Thankfully, the bloody stools were not linked to the meds, and the overdose wasn't going to be a problem. In fact they weren't bloody at all. He was a big fan of beetroot and had got some from his allotment-owning neighbour a day or two before...

I'm having IVF and had a particularly difficult embryo transfer. I have a high up cervix that was kind of hiding to the side, and very strong muscles which kept pushing the speculum out. The doctor tried to get good access to my cervix for about 30-45 minutes before calling time for a break. An hour later, after the doctor had spoken to other doctors on the phone for advice about difficult transfers, we tried again. This time they sat me upright with the hope a different angle would work. In the room was the doctor, my husband, the embryologist and four nurses. I was high off my face on gas and air which they gave me to relax my muscles. After another few minutes in the new position the doctor announced 'I'VE GOT IT.. I'VE FOUND THE CERVIX' and THE ENTIRE ROOM STARTED CLAPPING. It's made even more embarrassing by me slurring out some 'woop woops!!'s and 'yeaaahhhhhs' in my high as a kite state because I was so relieved they finally found it.

Having a smear test and the nurse puts in the speculum and tells me I'll just feel a little prick - I went into a fit of laughter

😂😂😂

In my early 20's I noticed that I had a large black mark, a bit like large black bruise covering the back of my upper arm. I knew it wasn't a bruise as it wasn't painful and I hadn't done anything to cause a bruise so I freaked out in a blind panic and got a GP appointment the same day. She took a look at it...then reached into her draw and took out a wet wipe she then preceded to wipe the mark away. Turns out it was dye that had come off my new black top that I hadn't yet washed. I was slightly embarrassed but actually more relieved I didn't have some flesh eating disease though to be honest. I do sometimes wonder what she wrote in the notes during that appointment. 😂

I was in for a routine smear. Did the usual preamble questions... when was my last period... about 10 days before.

Started the smear, she's having a good look and wiggling the speculum around and says "I think there's a tampon in there... has that been there for 10 days." FML. Off she went to find something to remove it with while I lay there and died.

My baby wasn't moving, so I ended up going to the hospital to get checked out.

While I was being checked over, baby started doing high kicks..

Not especially embarrassing but I was in the middle of being investigated for polycystic ovaries. I was getting it checked as a potential cause of irregular cycles that was making it hard to conceive.

The ultrasound scan confirmed cysts. My blood test happened the week I conceived my daughter. After months of trying.

I do have PCOS but still no official diagnosis of it, because obviously the blood test just showed my hormones were completely squiffy from pregnancy.

Went for a routine smear.. The nurse mentioned my - ahem- scar... Never even knew I had one there!!

I was once diagnosed with chub rub.

I mentioned it as suspected ringworm of the thigh.

Tbf it was an add on to another appointment.

As a result I lost that extra stone.