Health visitor is a waste of time

Just don’t go. I remember them telling me with my first that a newborn doing 12+ poos every day is normal. Never met a mum who thinks it is. Mentioned to the doctor at 4 months and cows milk dairy allergy was diagnosed. Honestly sometimes I think the HV is worse than nothing as often they are so keen to tell you everything about your baby is completely normal that you ignore your own instincts.

If she’s not helping you just don’t go!

Fair enough, but to be honest, it was more the comment about feeding a breastfed baby less. There’s so much misinformation out there about breastfeeding that it’s better to be corrected three times than for somebody to see the incorrect advice. It’s not meant to be personal (genuinely.)

Another message in support of HVs.

They do a thankless job (as seen here). They are an essential component of safeguarding and protecting our most vulnerable children. They have had cut back after cut back and intolerable work conditions. Most HV teams are running around 50% vacancy.

Cut them some slack if an appointment didn't go well. This often reflects issues on the day with both sides of the HV/mum relationship.

Thank goodness so many of you are not struggling and the HV is a burden in your good life.

Mine was useless. Showed up knocking at my door 5 days in, without any warning. Except my baby was born at 24+2 and still firmly in the hospital incubator. Then I got a phone call demanding I present myself with my baby in HV centre 2 hours away from my home... IN AN HOUR'S TIME!!! Yeah, sure, let me just unbrake the incubator and pop the oxygen tanks on. Then I kept getting almost threatening letters about vaccinations, hearing tests etc to the tone of show up or else. No matter how many times the head NICU nurse called them to explain the situation, it was to no avail. Absolutely useless.

I quite enjoyed getting my DC1 weighed regularly and the HV was alright. I had a car, though, so could drive there.

For my second I went less often and the HV was less nice. Seemed racist, (I’m white British) when she talked about a certain area of town known for its ethnic mix being a bit of a ‘black’ spot with noticeable emphasis. Didn’t bother going back after that. They are just people, some nice some less so. Some competent some less so.

@CorpusInterruptus I have said TWICE that I miss read and thought the baby was 5 months.
At 5 months some babies may be ready for solids and HVs would advise on this.
I DO NOT think a 3 month old should be given solids.

I had one, over 40 years ago, who was English. She was pretty hopeless, so I blew her out, and just used to go to the clinic for weighing etc.

That's nonsense though, it is a requirement of all public sector public facing roles to have good enough English to to the role adequately.

"Public authorities must ensure that members of staff in such roles, whatever their nationality or origins, are able to speak fluent English or Welsh. This means that they must have a command of spoken English or Welsh which is sufficient to enable the effective performance of their role."

If the service users struggle to understand them, or build relationships with them becuase of difficulty communicating, they can't be effective.

I found their visits completely pointless. They didn't tell me anything that I didn't already know and I didn't need to know their weights as they were growing really well.

If you need breastfeeding advice, you're best to contact la leche League and a lactation consultant. Health visitors are not trained in that area, wouldn't know the reasons why breastfeeding on demand is of benefit to mum and babe.

Thank you but we'll be declining your service from now on. We know where you are should we have any need in the future. Please update your records accordingly.

Most are not health visitors. Most are child development practitioners who work with the health visitor.

Oh my goodness. Do not feed a breastfed baby less. Or start solids.

It’s a very long time since I’ve seen a health visitor but they’ve always been either brilliant or a total waste of time.

The last health visitor we had was awful. My son was diagnosed with a disability at 10 months old, she rang to ask if I could bring him in to show a student what a child that will never walk looks like.

I think I only ever had the two visits at 1 day pp and then two weeks pp. and then never heard from them again until the 1 year review 🤷‍♀️ in our area they don't even take calls, they just have a parents text line but it's only open 9-5pm on week days so they have a bit of a backlog each day of all the evening and night texts.

They were cheery and nice but a little pointless.

Yeah mine was rubbish.
There were two things that I really could have done with help and support over and she couldn't have been more disinterested.

I remember discussing and laughing at/being horrified by some of the advice given by HVs with other mums IRL nearly 20 years ago, and have heard some disparaging remarks about them from midwives and GPs. Personally I've found some of them good, some not so good. Certainly not just a MN thing.

I had an HV come for one visit when my first was born then she resigned (hopefully this was just a coincidence). Never had one for my DD. I live in an affluent neighbourhood of London but they just couldn't hold on to them. So as part of my routine I'd walk to the clinic (about a mile) and visit them. Not that I got any good advice - my son was a bit cranky and it was always 'he's teething'. Well he was 'teething' forever as he didn't get his first tooth til he was 13 months!
Just say thanks but no thanks, though perhaps a constructive letter to whomever's in charge?

I've never encountered as much hate for health visitors as I read on here, asking routine questions is seen as prying and commentary on parenting, it's just bizarre.

I had a midwife come to see me and check DDs almost daily for about two weeks after I had them.

HV appointments were always optional and it was just a drop in. I went every week religiously with DD1 for quite a while then dropped it to one a month then stopped going.

DD2 I didn't go to as many drop ins. She was such bouncing baby and I was much more confident about feeding etc. We did get a HV home visit also when she was very small.

My health visitor was a godsend.

I'm always at the amount of people who say they are a waste of space for asking routine questions to get a baseline of what support or information a woman or family may need.

You may be ok, but women in your exact same background, education, financial circumstances could be going under. The only way to find out is to ask rather than assume someone with a degree isn't being financially abused or knows not to give a 3 month old honey.

A lot of mumsnet comments seem to be a mix of how dare you imply I'm less than norland trained because you're checking if I'm properly cosleeping and why didn't someone (hv, midwife) do something by mystic megging a problem- can't ask about breast feeding or latch because it is deliberately guilting formula feeding and simultaneously responsible for low breastfeeding rates by not offering targeted, support that doesn't involve checking what/how the baby is fed or getting on.

I'm much better than these 'bints', after all what does an experience nurse with an additional specialist qualification have to offer over Google

All while making mums who desperately need support or a sounding board anxious about the first appointment or failures for valuing help they receive.

@ObliviousCoalmine no I'm not a health visitor 🙂
I would like to repeat I miss read and thought the baby was 5 months not 3.
No solids just yet OP 👶

Like should you feed less? Cut down on breast milk and start adding solids.

Sounds like HV advice to me...are you an HV in disguise @Needmorelego