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AIBU?

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Original poster

Boyfriend’s bizarre underwear routine?

213 replies

Snickerdoodle55 · 04/06/2024 09:42

I recently moved in with BF. I have since discovered that he only changes his underwear after he showers in the evening and doesn’t replace them with a new pair each morning after sleeping in them. I think this is very strange and that each time you get dressed for the day you should change your underwear.

I haven’t lived with a man for a long time so I guess I could be unreasonable to think this way?

YABU - he is still changing them daily so no issue

YANBU - he should change them when getting dressed in the morning

OP posts:
CactusMactus · 04/06/2024 12:42

I prefer to shower in the evening and might put clean knickers on for bed or PJ bottoms if it's cold.
But I would change them in the morning.

Nice to go to bed clean.

Portfun24 · 04/06/2024 12:32

My husband does this, never understood it. He showers after work, clean boxers on then doesn't change till he gets his showered the next day after work. He's a tradesman and always says what's the point I'm putting a clean bum etc in it and going to do messy work the next morning. Clean underwear when he showers in the mornings when no work obviously though or on holiday in morning and after shower in the evening.

Its different I suppose for women with pants.

LadeOde · 04/06/2024 12:31

I'm another who doesn't get what's so strange about sleeping underwear? Confused not everyone enjoys rolling around butt naked in bed.

tinkertailorsoldierpie · 04/06/2024 12:28

At least he's not doing what my ex did AKA not showering for days even after working out in the summer, and getting back into musty old boxers each day. I can see why you think it might be a bit backwards, though. But he could be so much worse!

MyOtherCarIsAPorsche · 04/06/2024 12:26

I always shower before bed.

Couldn't stand to think that I was getting into bed with the day's sweat still on me.

I like my bed to feel clean.

There's no better feeling than having a shower and getting into fresh bedding (which I change once a week). I look forwards to this day.

Now waiting for the 'I put clean bed linen on my bed every day' brigade.

montysma1 · 04/06/2024 12:15

MotherofDogs3 · 04/06/2024 10:10

How is he unclean for not changing his underwear again after putting clean boxers on after showering the night before? Only on mumsnet is this seen as unhygienic and weird 🙄 The man is showering EVERY evening and changing his boxers EVERYDAY. Yep proper trampy behaviour 🤣

This.

Wotcher · 04/06/2024 12:11

Does he smell? Does it cause any noticeable hygiene issues?

If not, then what’s the problem? Life’s too short to get hung up about your boyfriend’s undies unless there is a tangible problem!

easylikeasundaymorn · 04/06/2024 12:09

OrlandointheWilderness · 04/06/2024 09:44

He sleeps in underwear?!

You don't!?

RomanRoysSearchHistory · 04/06/2024 12:08

Unless he's shitting the bed why would he need to put clean boxers on, a maximum of 8 hours after putting clean boxers on and sleeping in an (I assume) clean bed?

Tiswa · 04/06/2024 12:07

I prefer feeling fresh in the evening as does DD and DS. Coming in washing the day off and then getting into bed feeling fresh. Given that the bedclothes are clean as are our night clothes etc I still feel fresh in the morning to go about the day.

then I like washing the day off and getting back into my clean pyjamas

l would find sleeping and changing and not showering odd

Bobbotgegrinch · 04/06/2024 12:02

Snickerdoodle55 · 04/06/2024 10:22

He doesn’t smell (wouldn’t have moved in if he did!) and I don’t necessarily think it is ‘dirty’ more just unusual and not the freshest way to start the day

Would it still bug you if he put a fresh pair on in the morning, and then was still wearing them when he slept all night? If not, I can't really see what the difference is.

Personally, I don't understand any man who can skip having a shower in the morning. Having my sweaty balls sticking to my leg all day is not my idea of fun!

Cattery · 04/06/2024 12:01

Idontjetwashthefucker · 04/06/2024 09:45

I don't understand showering in the evening only, can't imagine you'd feel very fresh the next morning and ready for the day. Shower at night if I'm particularly grubby from the day but always, always shower in the morning with fresh underwear

Exactly

mitogoshi · 04/06/2024 11:55

Unusual but to eaches own, morning showers here and sleep naked

WhisperGold · 04/06/2024 11:27

UnctuousUnicorns · 04/06/2024 11:10

No, you sound about four for saying that. Many people prefer to sleep in underwear. It's personal preference, and doesn't make them "childish" for doing so.

Show quote history

Whoosh!

PeRiO · 04/06/2024 11:13

I don't see any issue with it, he's still changing them daily which is the main thing.

I don't understand what people do in their sleep to think/feel that they are dirty in the morning?? I've always been a shower at night person, i genuinely wouldn't have time in the mornings due to work etc. I appreciate the exception if you are a particular sweaty person for whatever reason but i don't wake up in the morning feeling dirty. I wear my pj's at least twice (probably more if i've forgotten how many days its been since i put them on 😱) before washing, they are hardly getting dirty when i've showered and laid in them for 7 hours. Maybe i'm a minger?? 😂

UnctuousUnicorns · 04/06/2024 11:10

FrenchandSaunders · 04/06/2024 10:30

"sleepy time pants" 😁, he sounds about 4 😂

No, you sound about four for saying that. Many people prefer to sleep in underwear. It's personal preference, and doesn't make them "childish" for doing so.

Whisteria · 04/06/2024 11:04

FrenchandSaunders · 04/06/2024 10:30

"sleepy time pants" 😁, he sounds about 4 😂

I laughed at the “sleepy time pants” too 😂😂

Tummytroubles22 · 04/06/2024 11:00

I have been married for 18 years and just realised I have no idea if DH does this, he showers at night and put clean boxers on for bed but I don’t know if he changes them when he dresses again in the morning. He doesn’t shower before work as he leaves at 4/5 am but he’s not sweaty I’ve never once thought he was whiffy unless after a full days manual labour on a hot day. He would go straight in the shower after work anyway.

LlynTegid · 04/06/2024 10:52

Ugh would be my thoughts, but I see you are OK with it.

Original poster
Snickerdoodle55 · 04/06/2024 10:46

Thanks all, was more just to get a feel as to whether this was a bit grotty or whether I’m being overly weirded out by it! Not a dealbreaker either way he’s a good egg. Plus, as some of you have said, he is washing and changing every day and based off other threads I’ve seen here I should count my blessings for that!

OP posts:
ginasevern · 04/06/2024 10:36

MuggleMe · 04/06/2024 10:26

I guess the issue is that normally you're wearing fresh pants for the portion of the day you're around other people, then they get sweaty at night but it doesn't matter. Whereas he's starting the day with sweaty pants. Ick.

This. Basically he's going through the day in his pyjama bottoms which isn't normal or particularly nice.

UnctuousUnicorns · 04/06/2024 10:32

Wontletmeusemynormalname · 04/06/2024 10:29

So for those who shower in the morning, do you change your underwear in the evening? He is changing every day, he just does it at night. Not sure what the issue is.

☝️Yep.

Fatotter · 04/06/2024 10:31

Wontletmeusemynormalname · 04/06/2024 10:29

So for those who shower in the morning, do you change your underwear in the evening? He is changing every day, he just does it at night. Not sure what the issue is.

Don’t wear underwear at night.

Nightie for me and pajama shorts for DH. These get washed after every use too.

UnctuousUnicorns · 04/06/2024 10:31

OrlandointheWilderness · 04/06/2024 09:44

He sleeps in underwear?!

I do, but I put on fresh underwear and PJ's or nightdress for bed. I'd never wear the same underwear for 24 hours.

FrenchandSaunders · 04/06/2024 10:30

"sleepy time pants" 😁, he sounds about 4 😂