Husband wants to put all his pensions in trust for kids.

As one would expect. Took two years to actually divorce. But we shared all assets fairly according to the English laws. He thinks it’s all grossly unfair.

But a SAHW cannot provide for herself if she has given up work to facilitate her husband’s career. It’s normally a mutual decision when a wife gives up work. So if they divorce, you think it should be tough shit wife I’m keeping all the assets and you now have to provide for yourself despite having a big career break and no pension. Only an absolute selfish twat would think this is fair.

My husband and I decided together that I would give up work for 10 years (we were earning equal salaries at the time) so that I could raise our young children, run the household etc. This left him free to work long hours, be able to travel a lot for work, never have to do school drop offs or cover sick days, prioritise working his way up the career ladder to provide our family with money. Should he have decided to divorce me 9 years later, before I got back on the career ladder, you think it’s fair that he screws me over and walks away with all the money accrued during the marriage?! Ludicrous.

Luckily the law disagrees with you. And luckily my husband is a lovely fair man, who has also paid into my own pension as well as his own while I was a SAHM.

Amongst all the noise about tax law and beneficiary rules, this is the best advice.

He’s almost certainly planning to leave you for a girlfriend and he wants to ringfence his assets first. Trusts can be reversed post-divorce and that’s probably what he’s planning. He’s not thinking of your children he’s thinking of his post-divorce lifestyle!

Make an appointment with a solicitor this week OP. Protect yourself. Take the solicitor’s advice as to what to say to him and when. Good luck.

Sounds like he's pre planning for divorce and trying to hide his assets from you.

Get a divorce solicitor now.

Make your dc your heirs in your will.

Seek advice.
"Rocky" marriages don't tend to have the best outcomes.

For me it meant that I was better off not waiting - so I filed myself.

Good! How did exH react?

A man speaks.

Either that or a very ignorant woman. Of course you're entitled to half the assets that have been amassed during the marriage. They're joint assets, not 'his' that he graciously allows you to have access to so long as you're still having regular sex with him.

@messiejessie

OP - first of all - don’t worry. You have time to sort this out.
If you are in England - the rules on Trusts and marital assets are such that money need to be in a trust for 5 years before they stop being considered ‘marital’.
In other words - if he files for divorce soon after moving pensions, or anything else into a trust - the Court would consider that he was preparing for divorce and was moving assets out of your reach.

I have gone through this exact situation with ExH trying to appear preparing for children’s future and setting up trusts. As my marriage was also rocky at the time - I decided that it was a clear sign that he was preparing for divorce AND trying to reduce the divorce pot in the future. For me it meant that I was better off not waiting - so I filed myself.

I don’t know your situation or your relationship - it’s only you who can make this decision. Do talk to a lawyer - they do of course like making money from divorces, so take their advice pragmatically.

Talk to H as well. You can be honest about this act tipping your decision towards divorce.
Thing is - he didn’t have to tell you about the trust. He could have done all the paperwork without your knowledge. (Which is what my Ex did, i found out by chance)
So given he did it openly - you can tell him where you are at - and maybe you two can still sort something out?

either make last push to fix things, or not

OP's DH has plopped on the thread. Jokes.

Um, the law?

Plus the fact that many, many women sacrifice careers and decent pensions for the benefit of their family, while their husbands increase their earnings and pensions because there's someone else sorting out the rest of their responsibilities. And you think the husband should be able to say 'tough, I owe you nothing' in the event of a divorce? Not all women of course, occasionally it's the other way round, but the above should still stand.

The law makes women entitled to it.

And so it should. I’m not planning on getting divorced, but I’ve facilitated my dh’s career by looking after absolutely everything. He’s never had to say no to any extra travelling or extra work because he had the security of me taking care of everything. And it helped him rise quickly above his peers who did have to say no to stuff.

He can't take the money from a pension and put it in Trust, he can direct the benefits to a Trust on death. Nothing he does would stop pensions being considered in a divorce.

If you don't wish to divorce OP, then you would need to challenge any death benefit allocation on dependency. That said, if he does this, divorce seems sensible.

Er, current law maybe!

This.

My guess would be that he is trying to stop you getting any of his pension when he divorces you. Though its odd if he is warning you of this in advance.

Current divorce law disagrees with you.

I know someone who needed to do this. The advice was to get hold of it asap if divorce is going to happen....the explanation was that there might be more in the pot if she took it at retirement age but it can't be ringfenced and any subsequent wives who divorced the pension holder would also be entitled to a share.

And if looking after that man and bringing up his children and hosting his dinner parties and allowing him the wherewithal to amass that pension has adversely affected your own career and finances? Bugger that.

Just quiet as a mouse see a solicitor in the next town over and protect your own assets as well as protecting your right to joint assets (and I'm sure you will have facilitated his ability to amass that pension fund).
Seems to me he's working himself to a position where everything he has is his whilst everything you have is half his too. Do not let this happen.

A lot of financial experts think that labour may change the rules around pension funds and inheritance tax when they get in. The 25% tax free amount may be under threat too. They need more money and they have ruled out other taxes.

You haven't actually left it to them and the pension trustees can override you. You have made an expression of wish. It will be taken into account and generally followed, but that does become less likely the longer ago the expression was registered. Especially if you later get into a ling term relationship, marriage, kids, step kids etc. Anyone who says they are dependent on you can stake a claim for the pension trustees to review, although that doesn't mean it will be accepted. Regularly updating to keep your expression of wish current is a good idea. I have worked in pensions and it can get messy when people remarry, have an additional child, promise it verbally to someone etc and forget to update.

Legally is he allowed to nominate children to inherit his pension if the OP started divorce proceedings? Would it be seen as trying to hide funds?

Divorce him ASAP before he can remove support from you in this way.

@messiejessie

My father is in a care home costing the earth due to having Alzheimer's

Perhaps he doesn't want his pension fund money to be lost to pay for your father's care home when your father's money runs out if you find yourself having to pay for it yourself (Out of your inheritance if your husband dies before you).

I think there's a lot of benefit in passing assets down to the next generation (and grandchildren) rather than to the spouse as it safeguards money being spent on care homes and also prevents the money going to the spouse's new husband/wife if they remarry.

I’d be concerned he’s starting to remove assets so that he can screw you hard in a divorce. If your kids are leaving home, he might have been waiting for the opportunity.