Husband wants to put all his pensions in trust for kids.

Most marriages really aren't rocky

Most marriages are not "rocky" and any change to savings are discussed and agreed between partners.

It seems like he is planning a future without you - he has had advice on how to minimize his assets in the event of a divorce.
Are there any other signs? New clothes/hairstyle/ staying out late "for work " / a new hobby which keeps him out on his own?

Take the advice offered here and get proper professional help, like he obviously has.

Most marriages are rocky! Maybe I am being naive but your husband may not have a sinister plan. If OP feels that DH's pension assets should be shared equally with her, then the same should apply to her rental property! Fair is fair?

THe ISA situation strongly suggest he's depleting his assets so he doesn't have to split them with you.

Don't be blindsided.

I'd get legal advice immediately and look to divorce if you have reason to believe he might do this behind your back. He may be 'lining his ducks up in a row' as everyone says on here.

But you are entitled to benefit from your combine assets as you were supposed to be a team in raising your DCs all these years. Your standard of living deserves to be equal to his, not lesser. And if he's looking out for himself only, then you need to protect yourself. And that may well mean divorce and securing your rightful percentage of the marital assets now.

And then you can plan what you need to do to move forward and add to your secure future.

Just echoing previous posters that pensions are exempt from IHT so his story makes absolutely no sense.

He's trying to protect his assets prior to divorce.

DB pensions are different.

You also cannot simply change beneficiaries of a trust and in particular, if the settlor is also a beneficiary the trust may be ineffective for whatever purpose it was set up.

He should leave his pension to you, but in the unlikely event of him dying young and you not needing the money, you can do a deed of variation so that it goes directly to the children. That way, you have the flexibility to assess what is best at the time, depending on circumstances. If he died next year you might need it for raiding the children / paying the mortgage.

The nominations under pension schemes are not challengable in the way you assume. It is only 'discretionary' because if it were legally binding, the pension lump sum would form part of the deceased's estate and subject to IHT

Depending on when he passes and her finances she may need it to live. The right thing will be to pass it to her in case she needs it and the kids inherit from her not cut her out and pass it to the kids directly to spite your wife.

It’s not his decision alone to make, it’s family finances and she should engage outside counsel.

Does it make a difference if the reason for her smaller pension is because she took time off work to look after their kids? But you think it’s right he unilaterally makes the financial decisions now especially when their marriage is rocky?

Change your will to leave everything directly to your children.

you need to see a lawyer and get things going on separating and sorting finances and divorcing. He is trying to sort the finances so you get nothing here as others have said IHT is a red herring. He can mark them as beneficiaries which is different, if you divorce they are still on the table in terms of assets of the marriage even if they are beneficiaries

@messiejessie

You are doing what most women going through this sort of situation do. Which is NOT believing your H has turned into a man protecting his interests at the expense of yours.

The talk of doing it for ‘the children’ is a smoke screen. The only person who benefits from this arrangement is HIM when (or if) you divorce. Any asset put into trust will have him as a trustee. So he will be able to use them.
But - for the purposes of divorce and asset division - these assets will not exist.
While EVERYTHING in your name will be divided 50/50. Your properties, your pension, etc.

Do not fall for this manipulation. His story of saving on inheritance tax is a lie. (mine also had a story about a trust for the children. Also totally made up).

So many women around me did not believe their H’s turned into those men hiding money. And got badly burned in the end.

You are lucky he showed his hand.

@cannonballz

no it doesn’t. What is OP supposed to live on? Fresh air?

Remember in the marriage service, all that I have I give to you? Well there are quantifiable laws to back this up, one person may bring earnings to a family, one person unpaid caring or cleaning or childcare, if still has a value and is misogynistic to think otherwise.

See a solicitor pronto!! This man is miles ahead of you in getting ducks in a row.

In the meantime, tell him that since he feels things need to be set up to benefit the children, you will be leaving the house and rental property in trust for them with a solicitor as trustee with the instruction that they be sold when the youngest child reaches majority (or finishes Uni) and the proceeds invested in trusts for the children.

Two can play at the assets deprivation game.

1 Who are you to say what someone else "needs"?
2 Its possible for the person who sets up the trust to "undo" some kinds. Its possible his plan is to divorce, get the assets business sorted then undo the trust again.

Divorce him

But the pension is jointly theirs, too. Yes, it's in his name now but in a divorce it would be divided, just the same as it would be if he'd had a savings account in a bank. It's not just up to him to make that decision.

Really!!

His money, his choice!!

The children are jointly yours so his plans make sense to me. And you have a small pension and a rental property that is extremely lucrative so you don't need his pension

Go and get independent financial advice

Including what would happen in the event of a divorce

He’s not very kind op.
My dh cherishes me as all dh’s should cherish their wives.

I think you need to get advice quietly and ensure he doesn’t deprive you of a share in his pension.

You need to get as much information about all finances as possible and speak to a solicitor as a priority. Somebody somewhere is advising him it seems.