How to deal with the anxiety of finding out you were the butt of a groups joke

Sometimes the most beautiful people are the most fragile and insecure. What have they got when their beauty goes....

Meanwhile you're a success. They are just jealous if anything, or perhaps it's just a joke at the other girls expense rather than yours as someone else said.

I'd be inclined to ignore. No good can come of getting involved. If they are bitches they will be gossiping over that involvement "oh did you hear what she said..." !

No better to let go. Who cares what they think. All of us on MN are proud of your achievements. Well done. You're doing great. They're just jealous and shallow.

Honestly if I saw this I'd just think, how mean, she's someone to avoid. I probably wouldn't say anything but I'd be thinking it.

Exactly- and how embarrassing for her that she's meant to be the "expert" in that field and someone with no experience out played her and got success without her input! It couldn't be more obvious that she's feeling rubbish that OP didnt need her and sorted it out herself. She's incredibly stupid because for her own business, it reflects really badly on her and I wouldnt seek out someone for content creation who engages in juvenile nonsense like that and pokes fun at potential clients. You never burn bridges in business- the OP could have recommended her to others if she hadn't behaved like a 12 year old.

Feel sorry for her, she's made herself look like a right dick

For a laugh? Yes that’s the whole point though. Laughing at her in front of other people is an attempt to bring her down and make her look silly. It’s competitive. That’s the goal. People don’t do things when there is nothing in it for them, even if that ‘thing’ is their own satisfaction at having tarnished someone else.

Someone told OP, but the other person probably knew there was a chance it would get back to her.

Tbh, if she gave the OP a quote and the OP didn't take her up on it or didn't engage in her services any further, it was most likely to be a daft joke between them to make her friend feel a bit better about it.

Essentially, her friend might just have been doing what all the people offering advice on here are doing - offering a way to take her mind off it and bolster someone else's confidence.

It desnt need to be taken any further.

People don’t play stupid petty games for no ends.

Of course they do! They do stupid stuff to make each other laugh. It's not intended to go any further.

The OP only knows about it because someone else told her. if they'd said nothing, the OP would be none the wiser.

I always think people like this are making themselves look a dick. All that's required from you is to ignore it!

Honestly if I saw this I'd just think, how mean, she's someone to avoid. I probably wouldn't say anything but I'd be thinking it.

Exactly this.

They'll have moved on and possibly even taken the piss out of someone else already.

It's hurtful to the OP but it was just a silly game - a joke between friends - it needs to stay as that.

I think you need to understand that this isn’t really anything to do with you or what you’ve done. She sounds really pissed off that you decided not to work with her. She has clearly decided to take this personally and has probably been mean about you and how you thought you were ‘too famous’ to need her services, rather than understanding that you just didn’t have the time to give to her. She has decided that it must be you at fault, rather than the way her business works being incompatible with your needs and has obviously made a big thing about this with her friends. Do not make that same mistake by taking it personally.

The perfect revenge would be to ignore it and carry on doing exactly what you’re doing (whatever it is, it is clearly working for you). Keep on growing your business and being successful. Don’t concern yourself with the hurt feelings of someone who has bitched to their friends about you because of her own insecurities. Let’s be honest here, if she’s bitching about her clients, that’s going to get out. It’s already getting out. You don’t need to do anything here; she’ll be the architect of her own downfall.

People don’t play stupid petty games for no ends. The whole point of that kind of behaviour is to knock OP down a peg or two to other people, to get a kick out of making OP doubt herself and ruin her self esteem or attempt to blacken her name. By reacting to it, OP gives the silly clown the satisfaction of knowing she has hurt her and she will rub her hands with glee while OP sinks to her level. It’s worked as OP is embarrassed and upset, but she shouldn’t make that known to be used against her.

I just wanted to pop on and say how sorry I am to read what this woman did. How incredibly mean and hurtful.

I agree with the advice not to respond. People who dont know dont need to know.

Hugs xxx

She’s a bitch. Well done on your success

Just be glad you didn’t take your professional relationship any further with her

I would do a post about "bespoke phone cases" and how easy they are to order and make it about the joke to make her question if you know!!

You sound lovely and as a business owner going from 1-12 is bloody amazing and very exhausting!

You've got guts to put yourself online and it's paid off and that rattles little people.

I’m sorry to hear this OP. It sounds like this woman is jealous of your success or holding a grudge because you stopped working with her.

My small business was recently trolled for no reason by someone. I knew it wasn’t a customer as what they said made no sense so I figured it was someone who just doesn’t like me. I actually did address it on my business page as they kept commenting on local groups.
I got a huge amount of support from my customers and the trolling actually stopped.

Lots of good advice given already.
Rise above it.
You've achieved your goal you can afford to be magnanimous. Not everyone is nice and you can't make that happen.

Just in the interest of general education, you 'bare' your bum and 'bear' a burden!

She sounds incredibly unprofessional and possibly in breach of contract- your marketing strategy is presumably information confidential to your business so not something she should be telling her friends about at all. Appalling.

In your shoes I would get in touch with her and ask her to set out exactly what information about the business has been shared.

Definitely don’t post anything about this online.

Tempting as it is to turn it into content or comment in some way, it will just feed the drama.

Whenever I see tiktok/FB content of the type you suggested, or other people have suggested, it just makes me roll my eyes. It's not what I follow you for, it's not what I'm interested in.

It sounds like your business and marketing strategy is insanely successful. Don't let some random woman derail you and take up head space. She's clearly mentioned you several too many times, otherwise how would someone she knows in a social setting have any idea about someone she met up with about business. This is very much more about her than you. It could have been any of her clients, you're just doing well, so they noticed you.

And congratulations on the success of your business, it sounds amazing 😍

She doesn’t want a reaction! She doesn’t want anything. It was a stupid petty game, it occurred at a specific situation and it’s over and done.

What you are doing is working for the business. Thats the most important thing. Enjoy your success.

First, congratulations on your successful business. No mean feat, and with the constraints of being a single parent, pretty awesome.
Second, ignore her. This has come from a place of jealousy, so turn it around and see it as a boost ('I've got something others are jealous of').
Third, this is all on her. She did a quote, didn't get the work, and then seemingly took the piss out of the potential client in a public setting. Childish, and utterly unprofessional.
Ignore, ignore, ignore.

That’s what occurred to me too!
Why focus on this silly negativity?
Think about the people you’ve given work too who are most likely grateful and think you’re amazing.
Haters gonna hate, so let them.

OP- Do NOT mention it on SM, ignore it and laugh at them privately- they're clearly jealous, noone is that spiteful without a negative inner motivation. If you post about it, it will reflect badly on you and it will continue the drama.

Yes it was hurtful but you said yourself, your strategy worked so they are the ones being idiots arent they?

I run a business and let me tell you- the more exposure you get, the more haters you will attract. Check out Mel Robbins podcasts on this phenomenon. Sadly, the more successful you become, the more people will like you and the more people will dislike you. You have to develop a really thick skin to deal with this so consider this a wonderful learning experience for you in letting shit go.

I can guarantee you that the most successful people I know all have followers or haters/trolls online and for no real apparent reason than their own bitterness. Having haters is unfortunately a mark of your success so think of it as a good thing in a weird way because what's the alternative?- noone knows who you are, noone knows about your business because you fly so totally under the radar that your business is anonymous and small.

You are doing amazingly- be proud of what you've achieved and for the love of God, dont stop now- dont let a few petty idiots ruin this for you. Dont dwell on this but do look online for other examples of this as you will find this phenomenon everywhere- take heart that it happens to all of us and it says everything about those people and nothing about you. x

First of all, congratulations on your business success. That’s fantastic! You must be very proud.

Don’t take to heart a silly game on a weekend away by a group of people you don’t know. I question the motives of the person who told you about it - how could that be a helpful thing to tell someone?

We all do things or make choices that other people on the planet might find daft, weird or game for mockery. So what? Screw those guys.

Don’t say anything, don’t “address it”. It was a silly in-joke between friends you aren’t part of.

(I assume you don’t actually have phone cases with your face on, and this was something they had made.)

But what you did worked didn’t it OP? You’ve made your business a success. Focus on that and do not let them distract you from carrying on.
There will always be jealous and bitchy people around. They aren’t worth your time or energy

Fuck them, they are not friends. Move on and network with other successful women entrepreneurs.

Whoops sorry pressed send by accident.

I doubt the other women are laughing about this. If it was my friend, I would like to think I would point out how mean a thing it was to do, at the very least I would disassociate myself from her in future and quietly make sure I never used her professional services in case she decided to take the piss out of me.

It's one very stupid and short sighted person. Don't feel you need to lose other friends over it.

Maybe the way to go is write a post saying how important it is as a woman to support other women entrepreneurs and list and thank a few people who are super stars. Makes the point by taking the high road.