To think it’s selfish for parents to retire early when their kids are renting?

But the DH is 59, so hardly a major reduction

This!

It would depend on why he wanted to retire early. Personally I would work to help my child get a leg up. In fact, we should do all we can to ensure our next generation do not end up a burden on the taxpayer.

That's a ridiculous suggestion unless you are very well off indeed. Retirement lump sums aren't for giving away. Obvious the give it all away brigade are nowhere near retirement

At 59, and if you have a degree, you have not worked your whole life. He clearly has a fairly cushy well paid job. Not a manual labouring one. The only people we know who have retired before 60 are teachers, doctors and civil servants. We, the taxpayer, mostly pays for this generosity but work longer ourselves. DH is working part time at 70. You can actually be semi retired.

I don’t really care who posted but it’s a luxury to retire at 59. I would prefer to see my DCs with a deposit for a house and we provided a very generous one.

Lots of people here don’t understand starting salaries for grads. Mostly around £30,000 or less. London more but only for high flyers. Rents at least £1000 a month when sharing. Saving becomes very very difficult. Plus one salary gets nowhere near buying anything! Most DC want to swap the rent for a mortgage but without a sizeable deposit, it’s difficult.

We saved for our DC. This dad obviously has his own interests firmly in first place. We prioritised our DC in a very overheated housing market. Nearly everyone we know has done the same. The OP now knows what her dad thinks about her so I’d back off when assistance is needed in the future. Families are two way support.

Very few people can afford to retire in their 50s.
The only ones who can seem to be in public sector roles (generous pensions) or who bought property when they were young in a cheap part of the UK. (Excluding the self-employed and people who own businesses.)

It's certainly not going to be an option for young people now who a) have far less pension and b) are often taking out 35 year mortgages.

The retirement age of 65 was established when most people lived for 10 years afterwards. It's not closer to 85.

It's been proved time after time that retirement is bad for health (unless you're digging roads) and people who live longer tend to love their work and keep working.

I personally would do this - in fact I will have an 18 year old and a 21 year old at 60 so they will likely still be on the payroll!. My parents gave me nothing. Not when they inherited from their grandparents or parents and so far not in their wills directly either. Their money, their choice, but I NEVER want to be as selfish as them. My financial plans include supporting my kids into adulthood, which is (imo) the point at when life gets tough and a helping hand makes a big difference.

I retired in my early 50s am 60 now and have never once been bored.
This perception that if you don't work you'll be bored/depressed is one of the great myths put about to keep people as a cog in the wheel of commerce.

If you are lucky enough to be able to live within your means there is a whole, fabulous, fascinating world out there that doesn't involve putting on a grey suit, schlepping to some God awful, artificially lit workplace and banging out dreary work for 8 hours a day.

You can study, travel, be creative, learn, volunteer, spend time with the people who matter to you, enjoy the small things, train to do something you really love, take in all the culture the world has to offer or anything else that makes life worth living the way you want to live it.

At 59 it's possible to have enough money to live on and the stark reality of time running out starts to play on your mind.

Money isn't everything.

The idea that I should fund my DC just so they will look after me in my later years is revolting. I nursed my dad in his last years with cancer without receiving a single penny ( no complaints there. I don't want my parents money). I am shortly going to be nursing my mum.

Dh is 56 and very much not in his prime. He is exhausted, having worked since he was 18. I am slightly less exhausted and younger, so I will continue to work when he retires.

this!

OP says she earns the same as DH in her first post.

He earns a decent £50k a year (same as me) and we have no mortgage.

I’m another who thinks the OP is the daughter. Assuming he’s 59 now, DH is hardly ‘in his prime’. He’s worked his whole life, made provision for his retirement and now he wants to retire. If OP is his DD then it’s clear that this is what she wants him to do, and with this level of entitlement I would doubt very much that she’d be involved with care in later life, beyond picking up the phone to social services.

It might be selfish, but that doesn't make it wrong. Most parents spend their children's young lives (until they are adults at least) being completely selfless - putting the needs of their children first (as they should). Once they have reached adulthood, many of us still make sacrifices, but it's okay to put yourself first.

@greedisunappealing HA! I'd not thought of that, you could be right.

Given your user name, you're not the DH are you?😂

She said they earn the same, so presumably yes.

It was almost definitely the daughter. I hope she's read the vast majority of the replies and taken the hint.

It’s not for you to bark your orders at him and expect him to comply. It’s also not his responsibility to ensure his daughter’s future solvency. @BeaRF75 hit the nail on the head with the stop the infantilisation of adults comment.

Just the initial posts from the OP then pooof - gone in a puff of smoke.

I agree with you OP. Life is going to get a lot harder for youngsters. It would be a no brainer for me

Oh well, he's chosen to do it anyway. I dare say he knows his own finances and capacity and has worked it out to suit him.

Good luck to him.

🤣🤣🤣

I'm talking about the actuarial reduction that is applied to the civil service or local government pension (ie 'occupational') that is applied if taken before a set age.

Yes, you can take it at 55, but a huge reduction faction is applied if taken earlier. State pension is irrelevant here.

I know, I've done it, jumped through all the hoops and did all the calculations.

Op also works I believe as she said in her op that they earn the same amount of money.

So if this isn't a wind up

Oh, I don't think there's any risk of that

Clearly he sees it differently, which is why the daughter is on here trying to drum up sympathy for treating her dad like a money tree.

He's not in his prime. He's nearly 60.

Economic landscapes are irrelevant. She doesn't need to buy a house. Nobody does. And there are millions of people who are managing to buy a house without any support from their parents at all. If she can't afford a mortgage, she can rent or figure it out some other way.

The father's opinion is the only one that matters, and he has chosen to retire after working his whole life and using his own money to do that.

It's also a pretty safe bet that a daughter who's willing to steal a year or more of her father's life to make hers easier will not be doing any caregiving later in life.

Fortunately, sounds like her parents have sorted their own lives out. Now she can do the same.