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Original poster

Paying for own coffee when out

38 replies

Fortunefavours1 · 02/06/2024 13:55

A friend and I meet weekly for walks and take turns to pay for our coffee and pastries. Hers are always a lot more expensive than mine and sometimes i bring my own hot drink so am paying for my pastry and her coffee and pastry too. Prices have gone up and it does add up over the month. I've found I'm turning down walks at times because of this and making excuses not to meet. I'm thinking of saying at the next walk, 'do you mind if we pay for our own, because I am watching my budget?' or is there a better way to word this?

OP posts:
ManilowBarry · 02/06/2024 14:04

"Diane, I'm on a budget now and I'm going to pay for my own food or drink from now on or bring my own stuff from home."

That's all you need to say.

Greygreyhouse · 02/06/2024 14:04

I would suggest just meeting at the park and bringing your own stuff so she can make arrangements to go to the coffee shop en route or before you meet up

I’m surprised your friend is letting you pay if you are bringing your own hot drink to a cafe. To me that would signify you can’t afford the outing

Dulra · 02/06/2024 14:03

I would just be honest you're on a stricter budget now and are cutting back from buying snacks out so will be bringing your own in future. She's your friend she'll understand

Dryplate · 02/06/2024 14:02

For a friend I see regularly, especially when the weather's good, I'd be frank and say the coffee and cake habit is too costly and can we take a flask this time.

I used to do regular bike rides with friends, with a lunch stop, until I noticed one would only order a cuppa and take sandwiches to eat later. Once we realised she was doing it to save money, we all did the same and were glad to save money too

User364837 · 02/06/2024 14:02

probably easier if you don’t get anything for the next couple of times - bring own hot drink and don’t have a pastry: then she’ll naturally have to get her own.

LiquoriceAllsorts2 · 02/06/2024 14:01

Caspianberg · 02/06/2024 13:59

I would just tell her in advance your trying not to buy so many drink out now for bank balance and environment. So from now will bring own drink

Just mention the bank balance. Environment could sound like you are being critical of her if she is buying coffee

Tel12 · 02/06/2024 14:00

It's fine, just say you're needing to budget more, so let's just pay for our own tab.

bluecomputerscreen · 02/06/2024 14:00

talk to her.
if she's a friend she will understand.

Caspianberg · 02/06/2024 13:59

I would just tell her in advance your trying not to buy so many drink out now for bank balance and environment. So from now will bring own drink

Original poster
Fortunefavours1 · 02/06/2024 13:59

Friend is not a cheeky pisstaker and is always generous in other ways but is better off than me so do want to word it right

OP posts:
Original poster
Fortunefavours1 · 02/06/2024 13:58

To add, this arrangement has been going on for a few years so I would like to give friend a bit of a heads up before we get to the cafe

OP posts:
fruitbrewhaha · 02/06/2024 13:57

So you have a cup of tea while she orders a pumpkin spice frappa whatever.

Just say next walk you are bringing drinks and a snack, she can either bring or buy the next lot.

Ereyraa · 02/06/2024 13:57

’I’ll just get my pastry today as I’m not having a coffee’